BRIDGET. BRIDGET. HECTOR. HECTOR. HECTOR. HECTOR. HECTOR. HECTOR. HECTOR. HECTOR. HECTOR. BRIDGET. BRIDGET. BRIDGET. HECTOR. BRIDGET. HECTOR. HECTOR. BRIDGET. BRIDGET. Telephone rings

BRIDGET

‘Rock Thrust? What a stupid name! ’

ANNIE

I know!

BRIDGET [composing email]

‘Hector and Nick come in without knocking! ’

NICK

Go, go, go, go, go!

BRIDGET

And Annie is crazy about adverts!

ANNIE

" Popcorn in your tummy, they're pop-tastic! "

NICK

... ... guess what? I've got the part.

HECTOR

Man, that is great!

NICK

I'm gonna be a star!

[composing email] ‘My own show, every night at 6 o'clock in front of a huge audience! ’

HECTOR

Today, London, tomorrow, Hollywood.

NICK

Ah, I co-starred with Russell Crowe in this one.

HECTOR

You, in Gladiator? Wow, Nick, I didn't realise. What were you?

NICK

The centurion.

HECTOR

Which centurion?

NICK

Ah! Here it is. There, that's me, on the ground.

HECTOR

Huh! A dead centurion.

NICK

Yeah, good, eh? I had some words, but they were cut.

HECTOR

What did you say?

NICK

" Nwrraaahhh! "

Hey, but now I've got the whole script just for me on television every night.

HECTOR

Nick, tell me, what is it?

NICK

It's my show. When I'm a star, I will not forget you, my friend.

VOICE ON TELEVISION

... Join me at 5. 30 PM today when I'll show you how to make a delicious chocolate mousse, a dessert for lovers. You'll need chocolate, eggs and butter.

And don't forget the way to a heart is through the stomach.

HECTOR

The way to the heart is through the stomach. What does that mean?

NICK

It means if you want a girlfriend, cook for her.

HECTOR

I want to learn how to cook.

ANNIE

Anyway, what do you mean by I watch too many adverts?

BRIDGET

Well, remember when you wanted us to change our washing powder?

ANNIE

Oh, ho! " Hello there. As a mother, I must fight different stains every day. Tomato ketchup. Chocolate - huh! Gravy. And egg.

But help is here! I will wash one shirt in ordinary washing powder and the other in new Zap! So, the shirt washed in normal washing powder is - oh! - still dirty, but the shirt washed in new Zap is …” Oh!

BRIDGET

Annie, have you seen my red T-shirt anywhere?

ANNIE

Oops!

BRIDGET

See what I mean?

HECTOR

Oh, hello, Bridget.

BRIDGET

Hello, Hector.

HECTOR

Oh, hi, Annie.

NICK

Oh, thank you. Yes, I know.

HECTOR

Do you know where Nick is?

BRIDGET

No, we've just arrived.

NICK

I'm a great actor.

ANNIE

I think I know where Nick is.

NICK

..... Would love to do the part, but I'm too busy.

No, it's not the money, but I don't need 15 million quid. Look, talk to my agent, Bridget, huh?

BRIDGET

I have an idea.

NICK

Oh, so Robert de Niro said yes already.

Hmm, well... hello?

Telephone rings

BRIDGET [pretending to be a Hollywood agent's secretary]

Hello? Nick Jessop?

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