Chapter 15 5 страница

As he pondered this, a different thought occurred to him, something that Lord Nox had just told him. About how, when a Sith was ready, they would cast aside their old name and take a new one. The names were often given in relation to what they were expected to do or what they'd accomplished. But they also served as a means of severing their ties with their past and forging a new future for themselves. 'I can choose my name. Be who I want to be. Not who others want me to be, ' he thought, finally coming to the realization of just what it meant. 'My names, Jaehaerys Targaryen and Jon Snow, in grand scheme of things mean nothing if I do not allow them to… Jaehaerys Stark…no. Not Stark. I, I might want to be a Stark. But, I – I need something new. What was it my mother called me? Dragonwolf? Yes. Jaehaerys Dragonwolf. That…That is my name. That is the name that I choose. That is who I will become. '

Moving to close the book, he realized as he flipped through a few more pages that there was a second set of writing on the back pages. Flipping the book open to the very back, he regarded the writing that stood in stark contrast to his mother's delicate hand.

" Your grace. Before you read further, please know that I have not read what your mother has left for you. That is for your eyes and your eyes alone. While I may not know the exact words that your mother used, I can guess. I know that my death is coming for me in the form of your uncle. Even now, while your mother labors to bring you into this world with but a single wet nurse for aid. I pray that your Uncle will arrive here in time and bring aid for both yourself and your mother, neither of you deserve this accursed fate that has been set upon you both. And I shoulder the blame for that. But the oath of the Kingsguard is both absolute and a crutch. I have done many terrible things and stood witness to more heinous acts than you can possibly imagine, unable to do anything as my oath as a Kingsguard prevented me from doing anything while my oaths as a knight, a lord, and a man demanded that I stand up and stop what was happening. It may sound odd, but I wish that I had the strength of will, the conviction, to do what Ser Jamie Lannister did when he ended the Mad King's life. I would've been put to death and called an oath breaker and kingslayer, but how many lives could I have saved had I done what needed to be done instead of what was easiest? It is a question I have pondered for months now. And I have not found an answer.

" Forgive my ramblings, my King. I have had so many doubts ever since I became a member of the Kingsgaurd. I thought that Rhaegar was free of his father's madness. But he wasn't…not entirely. He merely had a different form of madness. Obsession. Obsession with the prophecy of the 'Prince-Who-Was-Promised'. At first, he thought that he was the promised Prince. He dedicated himself to the art of a warrior in preparation for what lay ahead, even if he didn't know what it was. But then, one day, his obsession shifted. No longer did he think that he was the promised prince, but rather that the prince would be born directly of him. His son. And after speaking with his Uncle Aemon, who is a Maester at the Wall, he became convinced that his son needed to match Aegon the Conqueror exactly. 'The dragon needs three heads', he would constantly tell me. Elia gave birth to their first daughter Rhaenys. And when she was confirmed to be pregnant for a second time, he knew it would be a son. But then Aegon died a stillbirth and what was left of my friend died with him, though I did not know it at the time. He retreated into the library at Dragonstone for nearly a week. And when he emerged, it was with a revelation. 'Fire and Ice, ' he kept saying over and over. 'We were sent for Fire and Ice. And through Fire and Ice shall the prince and his second wife be born'.

" I thought it mere ramblings, my King. As once we left Dragonstone with the fake Aegon, he never once spoke of it again. But now, now I realize. The Tourney of Harrenhal was indeed so that your father could gain allies so that he could overthrow his father peacefully. But it was also so that he could find a second wife with Elia's blessing to provide more children. I realize now that Rhaegar had purposefully targeted Lyanna Stark. This was not known to Elia, who I feel truly had come to love with the she-wolf. Everything was seemingly going to plan, but then everything fell apart so quickly that we were not able to recover. Rhaegar showed himself no better than his father as he raped your mother several times a day to ensure his seed took hold in her womb. Gods, I wanted to split him in half the first time I had to stand and listen to him forcibly take her. She was but a girl of six-and-ten! But my oaths to the Kingsguard prevented me from doing anything. Then Rhaegar left and died. Then Elia and her daughter died. And now your mother lay on the birthing bed with naught but a single wet nurse to aid her, and I fear she will not survive you coming into this world.

" I ask—no, beg—for your forgiveness, my King. Even though I know that I do not deserve it. Forgive me for being a weak man, unable to do what was right and who instead let my oaths bind me into inaction. Ser Oswell Whent is of similar mind. He truly liked your mother. He enjoyed her wit and northern forwardness. And I know that listening to her screams and tears cut him far deeper than a sword ever could. We both wished we could stay by your side as your Kingsguard, or even your friends should you decide you not want the throne. But we know that we do not deserve such an honor. Death is the only thing we deserve. But while we have too much stubbornness to simply die, we will both meet our end at the edge of Ice when your Uncle arrives. It is no less than we deserve, and I could never harm the man that my sister loves more than life itself. Even if he has been forced to marry another, despite everything that happened.

" One last thing, my King. I know that these events have more than likely colored your opinion of your father's family. But I beg you to not remember the Targaryen dynasty and your ancestors based on the few bad apples. There were just as many good and just kings during the Targaryen Reign as there were bad. Perhaps more so. And if you truly need confirmation of this, I implore you to seek out your Great-uncle Aemon Targaryen at the Wall, provided he still lives. He will be able to tell you much more than I. Live long and live well, my King. Whether as a King, pauper, or knight. I know that you will do well in life.

" Your loyal Kingsgaurd, Ser Arthur Dayne. "

Not able or willing to read any more, Jon closed the journal and buried his head in his hands. The past half a day had been the most turbulent of his life. First, he found out his father wasn't his true father. Then he learned that his mother was dead. Then he read her last words to him and learned that while he wasn't a bastard, he was a child born of rape. Then the words of Ser Arthur, the Ser Arthur Dayne, the man he had always looked up too as an idol. Well, learning that the man he had tried to emulate his life had stood outside the door while he listened to his mother be violated time and time again. Gods, how was he supposed to deal with this?

" Jon? "

Jerking, he just barely managed to stop himself from drawing his lightsaber and turning it on Robb, who had somehow managed to enter Lord Nox's private meditation chamber without him even realizing it. Nox would've tanned his hide or made him run till he dropped from exhaustion for such a lax in awareness. Hell's even Ghost and Greywind had managed to get in with Robb without him noticing. " Robb, " he gulped, not even sure where to begin.

Robb approached him slowly, his eyes shifting towards the book laying closed before Jon. " Are you alright brother? "

" Brother, " Jon hiccupped, the one word meaning more to him that anything, " am I? I'm…I'm your cousin. A cousin brought about by rape thought justified because of…I don't even know what my…father thought justified it. "

The chair next to him scrapped across the floor as Robb sat down beside him. " You might be my cousin by birth. But you're my brother by choice Jon. Hell's, we've been through everything together. The first memory I have you are in it. And when your cock got hard for the first time you came to me in fright. And father, he's still our father. Regardless of who sired you or…or how you came to be. "

Chuckling through the sadness within him, Jon lightly knuckled Robb's shoulder. " I thought you swore on the old gods never to talk about that again. "

Laughing, Robb knuckled him back. " I swore I'd never speak of it to anyone else. I never said anything about when it was just the two of us. And besides, you know just as many embarrassing stories about me, perhaps more. "

" Yeah, " Jon nodded, his mood lightening. " Does Lady Stark still not know about the whore that Theon snuck into your room just before we left? The whore you couldn't do anything with. "

" Hey, I was ambushed, " Robb countered. " How would you react if you walked into your room after a long day and found a naked woman kneeling on your bed saying she was there for whatever you wanted? "

Jon didn't need to imagine. Princess Arianne had pretty much done the same thing. And he hadn't reacted any better than his brother had. But he wasn't about to admit that to Robb, not yet. So, he was going to tell a little lie. " Oh, I'm sure I would have handled it better than you, Stark. "

" Really? " Robb countered as look Jon did not care for entered his eye. " Are you sure, brother? Cause Dacey told me the most interesting story about how you escorted Princess Arianne back to her room. And how after you left you were in a complete daze and, well, you know the reputation of the Dornish. Did she show you her appreciation for defending her honor in the yard, brother? "

" Careful, brother, " Jon said, cursing Dacey in his mind and starting to try and plan his revenge on her. " Or I might just arrange something similar for you with Lady Talisa. "

" Hey, hey, she's off limits and – oh, you…" Robb tapered off as he realized he'd walked straight into Jon's trap. " Fine. She's, gods I've never met anyone like her. She's smart, almost ungodly so. And she acts more northern than most northern ladies I've met! And her skin, her eyes and that hair of hers…alright so she's been featured in my dreams more than once since we've met. So what? "

" No judgment, brother, " Jon nodded as he watched Ghost and Greywind play around the room. " I can understand where you're coming from. The difference between us is you might stand a chance with Talisa. Arianne, she's a princess and I—"

" You're the Apprentice to the Northern Sorcerer, a son of the Warden of the North, a brother to the future Warden of the North and you have the blood of two of the oldest and most well-known families running through you. " Robb said, fixing him with a look that brokered no argument. " Yeah, there's absolutely nothing there to make you a decent match for a Princess from Dorne. "

Smiling, Jon gave a thankful nod to Robb. " You know, Arianne might have said something similar. She said, well, I – gods. Alright, she said that it wouldn't have been unheard of for a Princess of Dorne to take a bastard as her consort. "

Smiling, Robb gave him a nod. " Well there you go then Jon. It seems like you have a far better chance with your lady then I do with mine. "

" And what about Theon? " Jon asked, scratching at the back of his head. " I mean, I might not always get along with him but…hells he's our brother also. "

" Yeah he is, " Robb nodded. " Hmm, that's a good question. We'll have to find a lady from somewhere far to the south, that way it can be a complete southern invasion on the purity of us poor Northern boys. "

" Not sure there's much purity left in Theon regarding women, " Jon laughed. " Not if even half of the stories he's told us about his exploits in Winter Town are true. "

" Half, at least, " Robb laughed.

Feeling the tension leaving him, Jon nudged the book with his hand. " Do you – Do you want to know what she said? "

He could see Robb's throat move as his brother stared at him. " Yes, but only if and when you want to tell me, brother. And not a moment sooner. "

" I do…just…not now. " Jon sighed. He knew he needed to talk about it. But, for just a short time, he wanted the words to stay private between him and his mother.

" Then when you're ready, " Robb nodded before clapping his hands and standing. " Well, now that that's all out of the way, let's get to the baths. We need to get ready for Lord Nox and Lady Nyra's wedding tonight. And gods help both of us if my mother or, gods forbid, Sansa finds even the slightest fault in either of our appearances. I swear, with the tear that our sister has been on since the announcement back in White Harbor you would think that she would be the one getting married today. "

" One would think, " he agreed, rising to his feet and taking the book with him. Walking over to the one section of the wall, he held his hand out and used the Force to unlock a hidden compartment in the wall that could only be opened with the Force. Giving the journal one last caress, he carefully set the book inside and closed the compartment up tight. " Well, Robb, let's go get sheered like the sheep our sister seems to think we are. "

" Not sheep, brother, " Robb laughed, slinging his arm around his shoulders as the two walked out of the chamber with their direwolves nipping at their heels. " Wolves. "

The slight chill of the Northern air was almost calming as Nox stood before the weirwood tree within the heart of the godswood of Winterfell. A calmness that he was in almost desperate need of. Some may find it odd, or even ridiculous, that a Dark Lord of the Sith, a Darth in rank, and a Member of the Dark Council could feel even the slightest hint of nerves. But in this time and place, it was all Nox could do to remain firmly planted to the ground beside Ned Stark, the man who had quickly come to be one of his few true friends, along with dozens of other Lords and Ladies from the North and the Vale as they waited for the woman who would soon become his wife to emerge from amongst the trees.

" Relax, friend, " Ned said quietly out of the corner of his mouth as they waited for Nyra to appear. " Enjoy this moment while you can, for the wedding will be over quickly enough and you will only be able to wish to repeat the events over and over again. Trust me, I know from experience. "

Nox was about to respond, but his words died in his throat as two people made their way from the trees and into the clearing between the rows of those assembled. Robb Stark stood tall and proud; the sigil of House Stark clearly displayed with the pin on his chest as he walked forward. And on his arm was the woman who would soon be Nox's wife, Nyra. And Force, if there was ever a divine entity, he swore that it'd descended and blessed Nyra. She was breathtaking. The white dress and fur that hugged her curves beautifully. The white maiden's cloak over her shoulders and her dark hair woven into an intricate braid and slung over her right shoulder. Force, she was beyond beautiful.

" Who brings forth this woman before the gods and men today to be wed? " Ned's strong voice called out, almost startling Nox, he'd been so focused on Nyra that he hadn't even realized that her and Robb had crossed the distance separating them and were now standing before the weirwood.

" I, Robb Stark, Heir of Winterfell, do hereby bring forth Nyra, vassal of House Stark, to be wed this day. "

" And who accepts this woman before the gods? "

" I, Lord Alim Nox, do hereby take this woman, Nyra, vassal of House Stark, to be wed this day, " Nox answered Ned's question, taking care to ensure that his voice was loud and steady.

Motioning for Nyra to take the last step forward, Robb let go of her before retreating to join Jon and his siblings, while Nox held out his hand for her to take. Nyra's presence was radiating pure joy and light as she grasped her hand in his and stepped even with him. " Nyra, vassal of House Stark, " Ned spoke loudly, a slight smile playing at the corners of his lips as he placed a single hand atop of theirs. " Do you accept Lord Alim Nox as your husband, from this day forth and until you are reunited in the realm of the gods? "

" I do, " Nyra responded, her head held high. " He is mine and I am his. From now and until we are reunited in the realm of the gods. "

Turning his attention to Nox, Ned placed his other hand underneath their joined hands so that he was holding them together. " Lord Alim Nox, do you hereby accept Nyra, vassal of House Stark, as your wife, from this day forth until you are reunited in the realm of the gods? "

" I do, " Nox said, feeling a joy he had not felt ever in his entire life as the words left him. " She is mine and I am hers. From this day forth until we are reunited in the realm of the gods. "

" Then kneel before the gods and may they recognize your union, " Ned said, stepping aside so that the two were left with an unobstructed view of the carved face of the weirwood.

While Nox was not of the faith of the North and would've perhaps preferred a different ceremony, Nyra was very much of the North and the faith of the old gods, even if she agreed with many of his views on the Force. And this ceremony was for her. Everything now was for her. So, with their hands still tied together, Nox and Nyra knelt before the weirwood tree and bowed their heads before rising once more. " Lord Nox, you may remove the cloak of Nyra, and place upon her shoulders the cloak of your house. And with this cloak comes your solemn vow to take and protect her, now and forever. "

Letting go of her hand was one of the most difficult things he had ever done. Unclasping the cloak at her shoulders, he gently removed the maiden's cloak and handed it off to Sansa, who'd stepped forward to accept it with tears of happiness running down her face. Undoing his own cloak, Nox wrapped the heavy black fabric around Nyra's petite frame, signifying that she was no longer a direct vassal to House Stark, but rather the Lady of House Nox.

" Lord Nox, Lady Nox. " Ned spoke, his voice gradually rising in pitch as he did. " You have come before the old gods and have sworn yourself to each other. And now I, Lord Eddard Stark of Winterfell, Warden of the North, do hereby proclaim you to me man and wife! May no man tear asunder what the gods have brought forth and witnessed this night! "

The cheers of the crowd were almost deafening, but Nox didn't care as he leaned forward and pressed his lips against Nyra's, sealing their bond. But as he pulled back, the cheering abruptly cut off into gasps. Nyra, both physically and in the Force, was glowing. To everyone save for Nox it might've looked like she was being blessed by the gods, but Nox could see what was truly happening. For there was a second presence that'd made itself known and was blessing their union as well. 'Ashara, ' Nox thought, reaching out for her presence and feeling a warmth in response. She was gifting Nyra both her blessing and protection through the Force. 'Thank you. '

The lingering presence of his lost love flared once more in comfort and warmth before fading, the light that'd been around Nyra dissipating slowly until it disappeared completely. " Fucking hells! " Greatjon Umber bellowed, slapping a massive hand to his equally massive thigh. " The sorcerer is a true Northman now! And Lady Nox, blessed by the old gods themselves! Now what are we all standing around here for? There's a feast and drink to be had! "

Sweeping Nyra up into a bridal carry, Nox pressed a quick kiss to her lips as she wrapped her arms around his neck. " I love you, my lovely Lady Nox. My wife. "

Her joy was almost blinding as she tucked her head onto his chest as he walked out of the godswood with the Lords and Ladies of the North and the Vale following behind. " And I you, my husband. "

The next several hours passed in a blur for Nox as he and Nyra sat in a place of honor within the great hall of Winterfell while a feast unlike any Nox had ever experienced since coming to this strange land took place. There were several different animals roasting on spits within the fireplaces all around the hall. Wine and ale flowed freely and there was a sense of revelry that Nox would not have expected of the usually serious Northern people. It seemed that when the people of the North found an excuse to celebrate, they did not do it in half-assed. Jon, Robb, and Theon were both being permitted to drink undiluted wine, in a limited quantity of course, but given their age it certainly hadn't taken long for both boys to go red behind the ears. And they'd even managed to get Samwell Tarly to down a full cup of wine, which of course was almost enough to do the boy in as he quickly ended up on the floor giggling while the other three laughed at his antics.

By the time the younger children were put to bed, an exodus which had been started when Lady Stark had announced that it was time for her children, save for Robb, to head to bed, all four boys were well on their way to being drunk. Of course, they were relatively tame in comparison to some of the others in the hall. He wasn't quite sure just what had started it, but the Greatjon and Maege Mormont had at some point in the night started a drinking competition, and now Nox was seriously starting to wonder if they would run out of wine before either one or the other would concede defeat. And there were more than a few of the younger men that were chasing anything with a skirt around the hall. Though, to be fair, it seemed like there were quite a few women who were chasing the men as well. The atmosphere was such that Nox was relatively sure that there would be a 'baby boom' within the next year given how many in attendance were pursing such delights.

Feeling the night starting to wear on him, not to mention the persistent ache that hadn't left him since this morning, Nox wrapped his arm around his wife and leaned in towards her ear. " Have we stayed long enough for propriety's sake, my love? " He asked, nipping at her ear slightly. It had to have been the wine. " As beautiful as you look in that dress, I would much rather show you my true appreciation for your beauty in private. "

Blushing fiercely, Nyra nodded as a servant placed a new chalice of wine down on the table next to him. " Aye, that we have. Let us finish this wine and retire so that, well, so that we can show each other our appreciation more appropriately. "

Nodding, Nox picked up his wine and downed most of it while Nyra slowly sipped on her own. " Ned, " Nox called out lowly, getting his friends attention. " Not to break with tradition or anything, but Nyra and I are going to slip out here. Like hell am I going to let a bedding happen. "

Smiling, Ned nodded. " Aye, I can understand the sentiment, my friend. Enjoy your night together. "

Feeling more than a little warm, Nox took Nyra's hand in his own and got to his feet. And then promptly almost collapsed as his legs didn't seem to want to support his weight. " Gods, husband, " Nyra chuckled with him as she somewhat supported his weight. " Just how much have you had to drink tonight? I surely do hope you haven't indulged yourself to the point where you will be unable to perform your husbandly duties. "

" There is not enough wine or ale in the world that could keep me from performing that duty my wife, " Nox laughed, though on the inside he was confused. How out of practice was he that such a relatively small amount of wine as he'd drunk tonight was enough to put him in this state?

Rising to his full height, he almost immediately collapsed again. " Gods, maybe I – had more than I thought, " he laughed, his throat suddenly parched as he searched for a glass of water to try and gain his wits about him.

Coughing again, he started to feel something was…off. It started low in his gut, then it exploded. Doubling him over in agony he hadn't experience since he been under the Overseer's watch in Korriban. Letting loose a hacking cough, Nox frowned as he felt something wet leave his lips. 'Spit? No, ' he wondered, confused as to what was happening. 'Blood. My blood…What…? '

The pain intensified again, doubling him over and making him almost collapse onto the table. " Nox! " Nyra screamed as his Force Vision started to waver.

'What – Poison?! ' he realized as he started coughing up globs of blood onto the table. 'The…The warning! It – It was not about the darkness! It – Shit! '

Something hard and sharp pierced through his shoulder, nearly spinning him around as his shoulder was thrown back. 'A…bolt? ' He realized as he could feel the bolt still quivering in his flesh, 'how…when…shit! ' Throwing his arm out in front of Nyra, he let out a pained yell as the crossbow bolt that'd been intended for his wife's heart imbedded into his outstretched forearm. " Run! " Nox yelled with a pained cough as his vision darkened even further while all around him the great hall which had once been a sight of joyous occasion turned into pandemonium.

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