CHAPTER THREE

CHAPTER THREE

Shattered, Caroline could only look at him. Grandy? A stroke? No! Nothing could touch him. He'd never been sick a day in his life, not even a cold. When her whole world ended last year, he was the one who kept her from falling apart by going on with his abrasive, no-nonsense, everyday routine. It hadn't changed in all his sixty-five years. It couldn't change now. He was tall and spare, a man of the earth. Nothing bothered Grandy. It couldn't be a stroke. That only happened to people who were over-weight and who smoked and who had high blood pressure. None of those things described him. Grandy was healthy.

Or was he? Her thoughts screeched to a halt then began rushing in another direction. Maybe he'd been failing all along and just never said anything. Maybe that was why he was so insistent on hiring a housekeeper and someone to help him with the farmwork, only he was too proud to tell her the real reason. Oh, Grandy! Why hadn't he trusted her enough? She trembled. Each of them in his own way had leaned on him and now she realised how selfish that was. She drained his strength when she should have been lending him some of hers. He was always there when she needed him. She'd have to be there for him now.

A small sob rose in her throat as the mist cleared from her eyes. She felt David's hands on her shoulders. He was looking straight into her face with eyes that unnerved her. She had never seen them this close before. They were brilliantly blue and full, of a calm quiet strength he was more than willing to share with her. Her legs were curiously weak and shaking as panic tried to claw at the edges of her mind. This wasn't the same as when they came and told her her mother was dead in a road accident. David was here now, shielding her from the pain.

He gently drew her into the warm secure circle of his arms. It was safe here. She had nothing to fear. Nothing could touch her. Just for a minute she buried her face in his chest, breathing in the warm earthy scent of him.

He was sweating and had spent his time with the cows this morning but Caroline could only smell the fresh clean scent of the sun and the wind and the sea that was uniquely his. Her arms curled around his broad back as if she had every right to embrace him. He was warm and solid against her palms, his length fitting so perfectly against hers. She wished she never had to let him go.

For a long minute he simply held her, his chin resting on the top of her head, then with obvious reluctance, he gently loosened his hold, his hands slipping down her arms to support her trembling body. Before he released her completely and stepped away, she caught a fleeting look of something in his eyes but she had no idea what it was.

'Where is Grandy now?' Morwenna asked softly, her face full of concern.

'On his way to hospital. John Polgearon was with us when he collapsed. He took Grandy in his car. I left Sharon with her father and came for Caroline.'

'You were right to do that. If Grandy needs anybody now, it's Caro.' Her husky voice suddenly became brisk when she noticed her standing there so stricken. 'Go with David,' she said. 'Steven and I will see to your father and the boys when they come home from school. We'll wait for you there.'

Caroline nodded dumbly. So many things were trying to crowd in on her. She couldn't make sense out of any of them. Her legs were like rubber when she tried to move forward. All she had to do was put one foot in front of the other but her legs refused to move.

David reached out and gently linked her hands with his, letting his strength flow into her cold shaking fingers. Then he touched her cheek. 'I'm here,' he said gently.

A convulsive shudder trembled through her. Nothing could happen to Grandy. David was here to make everything all right. A travesty of a smile pulled at her mouth when she looked blindly up at him. 'Yes,' she whispered through the tight ball of pain in her throat.

His strong arm curved around her back, guiding her to his car. In reality, he half-carried her there.

Everything flashed by in a blur on their way to the hospital in Penzance. A stiff breeze was blowing through the open window but it didn't cool her churning emotions. It was a warm afternoon .with the sunlight glittering on the tossing blue expanse of Mount's Bay as they streaked along the road. Seagulls wheeled in the distance and the water foamed against the rocks.

Can't this car go any faster? she thought, her hands trembling in her lap.

A smile loosened the tense muscles of David's jaw. 'We're flying low as it is.'

She froze, her gaze clashing with his. How could he know what she was thinking? She hadn't said a word out loud.

As if in answer, he simply reached out and curled one big hand around both of hers and squeezed. The pressure was pleasurably firm and comforting and she found an enveloping warmth creeping up her arms and flowing to the rest of her. At once her anxiety lessened. He was a man of few words and somehow it was right that he didn't need them. She knew if it was at all possible he would make everything all right.

The hands of the clock dragged interminably in the hospital waiting room. John Polgearon had to leave after waiting with them for more than an hour. David promised to let him know as soon as they had something to report. Caroline jerkily paced the floor, tensing every time someone walked past the door. This isn't the same as when Mum died, she kept telling herself. Her head was throbbing and she roughly rubbed her temples with her fingertips before finally subsiding on to a chair. Surely somebody ought to know something by now?

David sat across the room from her, silent and unmoving, yet she knew this must be hard for him as well. It must bring back memories of the hours he spent in hospital waiting while Judith slowly died of cancer. Her heart went out to him. How could he sit there so calmly?

His hair was windblown, a stray light brown lock falling across his forehead. No matter how many times he pushed it back, it kept falling into his eyes until he finally left it there. The calm strength she noticed before was still in his eyes. They were a darker blue now and compelling. His nose had a slight bump on the bridge of it as if it had been broken at some time. Deep craggy lines of time and experience were etched on the sides of his mouth. Like brackets, she thought, cleaving his strong jaw, enclosing the fluid line of his lips. His chin had a faint cleft in the middle of it. She followed the movement of his neck when he swallowed.

A pale blue shirt stretched across his flatly muscled chest with sleeves rolled back to his elbows exposing strong arms tanned and sprinkled with glinting blonde hairs. His jeans were faded and worn soft, hugging his long legs as they stretched out in front of him and crossed at the ankles. His boots were a dusty dark brown and she wondered how far and what kind and how many places they had taken him.

She never gave much thought to her own appearance before. Sharon was the beauty of the family. Caroline was plain and took it for granted. Tall and gangly with long brown hair usually falling down her back in a single braid, she was suddenly conscious of her plainness and how disheveled she must look to him. Her white blouse was clean but wrinkled and had a button missing where she had torn it earlier. Her jeans were old and stained. Canvas shoes, no longer white, were on her feet.

Her eyes returned to his steady gaze seeing something stir in those dark blue depths before she abruptly turned away. Warmth flooded her body. She had been caught staring and somehow he knew exactly what she was thinking. She marvelled that he could walk around in her mind like that.

Just then a white-haired man with a stethoscope around his neck came in and David was forgotten. She jumped to her feet and held her breath.

'Miss Pentreath?'

She nodded jerkily, her eyes widening.

His face was bland. 'I'm Doctor Treveglos. Your grandfather's had a stroke,' he said quietly. 'He's resting comfortably at the moment. Will you come to my office where we can talk further?'

At once David was beside her, his arm tightening around her shoulders to give her the strength to follow him.

'Your grandfather's a very lucky man,' the doctor said dispassionately, motioning for them to sit down. 'It was a relatively slight stroke. Just enough to shake him up a bit. I've been warning him this might happen if he didn't slow down.'

Caroline let out a gasping breath, unaware until now that she had been holding it. 'I didn't know.' She subsided awkwardly in her chair, staring at him. 'He never said anything.'

'Evidently Mr Pentreath's been seeing you for some time, Doctor,' David's quiet voice came between them, soothing her raw nerves. 'Has he been having problems long?'

'He's had a rheumatic heart condition for years but we've been able to keep it under control. For the past year, however,' he glanced at the chart in front of him, 'he's been under a great deal of stress with—his son?' He raised his eyebrows and looked at Caroline over the rims of his glasses. 'Your father?'

She nodded unhappily, twisting her fingers together. She thought she had done so well caring for all of them, but all this time Grandy was worrying himself right into a stroke. 'He never said anything!' she almost cried, sudden guilt and anger and dismay running across her face.

David's strong fingers closed over hers, stilling her fears. His calm eyes probed hers with disturbing intensity. 'You must know he wouldn't have wanted to burden you with it. You were already doing the best you could do.'

She shuddered, remembering how only last week Grandy said her best wasn't good enough.

His face softened with compassion, as if he knew, then he looked back to the doctor, taking charge without taking over. 'What can we do?'

The older man visibly relaxed in the face of this calm acceptance of the inevitable.

'Very little at the moment. Mr Pentreath's vision is affected in one eye and his speech is hesitant. There's some paralysis on his right side as well. He's being given medication to stabilise him and we'll begin therapy later today. I see no reason why we can't expect a complete recovery in a matter of months. The main thing is to keep him calm and free from anxiety.'

Caroline compressed her lips wondering how that was possible. Nothing had changed. When he came home, her father would still be the same. She'd still be his jilted granddaughter, the inadequate substitute for her mother, the cause of all his problems. 'May I see him?' she asked.

He regarded her intently. 'Can you go in there and reassure him? Make him believe he has nothing to worry about?'

'We will,' David cut in forcefully, not looking at her.

Strangely enough she knew it just might be possible. There was something about David that inspired confidence. Maybe something would work out after all. She nodded to the doctor and smiled tremulously. 'Yes, we will,' she echoed.

Grandy looked frail against the white sheets in the high hospital bed. His face was grey and his workworn hands looked oddly pale lying there so flaccidly at his sides. Caroline's bottom lip quivered but somehow she managed to smile. 'Oh, Grandy,' she whispered.

One side of his face was twisted and a small muscle was jerking in his jaw when his eyes fluttered open and he tried to speak. Harsh unintelligible sounds came from his throat. His good hand clenched and his eyes strained angrily.

'It's all right,' David soothed, gripping his hand hard. Leaning closer, he gave him an eloquent wordless look, willing away his fears. 'You don't have to say a thing. Just rest. Morwenna and I will stay with your family until you're well again. The doctor said your stroke was slight. You'll be up and around in no time. Do you believe me?'

Grandy stared at him for a minute then his eyes suddenly filled with tears.

'Believe me!' David said fiercely. 'I wouldn't lie to you! Nothing will happen to any of you. I won't let it!' He made himself smile more gently and curled his free arm around Caroline, moulding her close to his side. 'This is a good woman you've got here. Between us we'll keep everything under control.'

Grandy's eyes flared then flickered closed and he relaxed, falling deeply asleep, a faint smile softening his lips.

Caroline trembled, wondering how David could project such calm assurance like that. He barely knew them, after all. How could Grandy trust him so completely? It wasn't right. Every instinct told her it wasn't right.

She stiffened suddenly and pulled away from him, some strange compulsion telling her she was crazy to trust him. That was the first step. First came trust, then love, then betrayal.

David's mouth twisted and with a curt nod, he motioned that it was time to leave. 'We'll let him sleep. That's the best thing right now.'

Once in the hallway, she sagged against the wall. 'He looks so awful!'

'You should have seen him when he collapsed a few hours ago!'

The harshness in David's voice jerked her head up. He had been so calm, so gentle before. She almost didn't recognise him as the same man of only a moment ago. His face was rigid and cold and stern, as if he was controlling some fierce inner anger.

And then it dawned on her and something inside began to shrivel. All this time it was an act! A grand gesture! He wasn't the strong silent one totally in control, taking on the responsibility of their well being. He was a stranger suddenly trapped into helping them, dragged in because he happened to be there when Grandy needed someone and now because of some mad impulse on his part, he was being forced to keep on helping. They were nothing to him and it was wrong to impose on him like this. She had two perfectly good feet. It was time to stand on them all by herself.

Something stiffened inside her and she stepped away from the wall, straightening her shoulders, her chin coming up with stubborn pride. Smoothing her shaking hands down the sides of her jeans, she bunched them into fists to steady them and gave him a bright smile to hide her painfully evident distress. 'Thank you for all your help, David. I . . .' she swallowed past a dry lump in her throat, '... appreciate all you've done. If there's some way I can repay ‑'

'Oh, stop!' he cut in harshly. 'I have to make a 'phone call. I'll meet you outside in a few minutes.' He strode away without another word or a backward glance.

When he brought the car around, Caroline was still reeling from his harshness. He could have accepted her thanks. It was all she had to give. Her teeth were clenched so tightly they hurt but she got in the front seat without a word, her thoughts racing.

How could she be so stupid? David was a stranger. She could have died of embarrassment when she remembered how willingly she went into his arms earlier. As if she belonged there! As if he could make everything all right! Was he going to think ...? She shuddered. She didn't want to know what he thought.

By degrees the silence between them became frigid. The sun was sinking into the bay with a brilliant rosy splash as they drove home. Caroline barely noticed. She was only conscious of the sharp line of David's profile, all stony and hard. He ignored her, his eyes staying on the road, his mouth a thin bluish line.

She felt sick with self-recrimination. The air was heavy and oppressive and her throat ached with the sudden need to cry. Her chin quivered and she blinked furiously at the hot tears rising in her eyes. This had to stop. Men hated tears. If he saw, it would only bring more and greater humiliation down on her head.

The motor stopped humming and she pulled herself together, looking around uninterestedly. They weren't even near home yet. David had left the motorway for a little used lane ending in a cove and was thrusting open his door and getting out as if he couldn't stand to be near her any more. She watched him walk to the edge of a low cliff with its boulders tumbling headlong into the sea. His hands were shoved deep in his pockets and he was staring moodily at the swirling water below.

It was deserted here, the bracken thick and blowing. Dusk was rapidly falling and Caroline got out and breathed deeply, trying to get things back into perspective. The future never looked so bleak but somehow she'd survive. Somehow she'd do it. Scrambling down the rocks closer' to the water, she told herself it wasn't the end of the world. She was capable of taking care of herself and her family without asking any favours from anyone.

A stiff breeze struck at her, loosening her hair from her thick braid and she had to drag it out of her eyes to keep herself upright. Reaching some loose, shifting sand and rock, her feet shot out from under her and she pitched forward, tumbling almost into the water, sprawling flat on her face in a shower of sharp wet gravel. In a way she was glad. It gave her a reason for the uncontrollable tears that began to trickle down her face.

There was the sound of more loose gravel still falling behind her, then: 'What are you trying to do? Break your bloody neck?' David bit out violently, hurtling down the cliff. Falling to his knees, he lifted her by the shoulders and turned her roughly on her back.

'Well if I am, it's my bloody neck!' she sobbed. Tears were streaming from her eyes and her nose was running and there wasn't a thing she could do about it. 'Go away and leave me alone. I don't need you!'

His hands tightened, hurting her, digging into her shoulders. 'You selfish little fool! That's what this is all about, isn't it? All of a sudden you realised just how much you do need me. I saw it in your eyes when you looked at your grandfather. And then you had to pull away from me, didn't you? You couldn't let me help you.' His voice shook with jeering contempt. 'Oh no, not Caroline. She doesn't need anybody. Nobody gets close to her. That might mean leaving herself wide open to hurt again. Damn you, Caroline! Do you think I'd ever hurt you?'

Her eyes widened and she glared at him in this half light. How could he know that? How dare he know her better than she knew herself? If there were times when she was strangely restless and felt a painful sense of emptiness, she never let herself dwell on it. If she deliberately stayed away from people and cared for her family, it wasn't because she was afraid of needing someone and being hurt again. That wasn't it at all. He was wrong. He had to be wrong.

She quivered, wanting to voice her resentment, but she couldn't utter a sound. The sudden shimmer of pain in his eyes caught her and held. He knew everything and understood and wanted to help her.

An abrupt stillness came between them, a breathless suspended moment needing no words. They kept looking at each other and neither of them dared to breathe.

Her eyes probed his for one more long second before his face came closer, his eyes closing before his mouth came down on hers. It was inevitable, unfathomable, but not the least bit hesitant. She never would have believed anything so gentle could be so masterful. If he had demanded a response, she wouldn't have given him one. But he drank from her lips as if from a fragile vessel and everything inside her melted.

Yielding, pliant, she lay on the sharp stones feeling only the warm touch of his lips on hers, the silken strength of his hands sliding up her shoulders to cup her neck, his fingers disappearing into the tangled thickness of her hair.

He wasn't taking a thing. He was giving.

Her arms came up and settled on his broad back, the wild leap of her heart quickening and flooding with a bruising sweet rush of desire. Instinctively her mouth opened like a flower and she was lost in a devastating surge of feeling she never knew was possible.

His breath filled her. He was giving so much. The well was endless. He kept on giving.

Philip had kissed her many times but never like this, never ever with this soul-stirring gentleness. For the first time since she had been left waiting at the church, hope flared. The ice surrounding her heart began to move.

David had been kneeling beside her but at some point he must have shifted his position.

She became conscious of the entire length of his warm heavy body against hers and delighted in the exquisiteness of being so close to him. It was glorious and reassuring and somehow so right. If only she could stay with him forever. If only she had the right-to lie with him and love him in all the ways there were ...

Her eyes flew open.

It couldn't last. He was giving her so much and she had nothing to give in return. He didn't want her gratitude yet she couldn't give him anything else. To draw from his strength the way she had done to Grandy would make her a taker and she would never be that. It went against every principle she believed in.

Everything stopped. David sighed as if he knew where her thoughts were taking her and gently eased himself away from her. Sitting up, he dragged his hands through his hair. After a moment he got to his feet and stood looking down at her, something suspiciously like anger running across his face before it settled into impassive lines. Then he carefully lifted her to her feet.

'You're not taking advantage of me by accepting my help,' he said huskily, brushing down his jeans. 'I wouldn't have offered if I hadn't wanted to do it.'

'It's wrong, David. It's an imposition.' Her voice shook and she hunched her shoulders.

'I don't want to argue with you.' He kept his voice gentle with an effort. 'And I'm not going to apologise for what just happened either. I wanted to do it and we both enjoyed it, though I'm sure you'd be the last to admit it. Everybody needs somebody, Caroline. You're not alone any more whether you want it that way or not.'

⇐ Предыдущая 10 11 12 13 141516 17 18 19 Следующая ⇒