CHAPTER THREE

Roxy could not explain it to herself, but she felt chilled despite the warmth of the sun beating down on to her face and arms as she sat silently beside Marcus in the motorboat cleaving its way back to where they had started from earlier that day. He was angry; she had felt it in his touch when he had helped her into the boat, and she felt it again now as he lifted her on to the wooden platform, and it left her feeling tense and uncomfortable, wishing she could offer him a reasonable explanation, but unable to find the right words.

'Roxy! ' A light, faintly petulant voice interrupted her turbulent thoughts. 'Well, fancy meeting you here of all places! '

Recognition ignited a deep-seated irritation in Roxy and she said stiffly, 'Hello, Vera. '

'Aren't you going to introduce me to your friend? ' that petulant voice demanded, and Roxy sighed inwardly. She had problems enough without Vera making it worse, she told herself, but she made the introductions nevertheless.

'Marcus, this is Vera Sinclair. Vera... Marcus Fleming. '

'How do you do, Miss Sinclair, ' Marcus said quietly.

'Oh, please don't be so formal, Marcus, ' Vera insisted with a hint of seductive laughter in her voice. 'Roxy and I have been friends and neighbours for years, so we're sure to meet again. '

'No doubt we shall meet again, ' Marcus replied, and he, too, sounded as if he were smiling.

Impatient voices called to Vera from across the parking area, and she sighed, saying with obvious reluctance, 'Oh well... be seeing you, and soon, I hope. '

There was an excited clamour of voices mingling with loud laughter, then a car's engine was being revved with unnecessary violence before it was driven away at speed with the sound of gravel scattering beneath the spinning wheels.

'She's a friend of yours? ' Marcus asked Roxy some minutes later when they were driving back to Johannesburg.

'I wouldn't exactly call her a friend, ' Roxy replied almost defensively. 'We've known each other since my father and I moved in next door to them, but we have very little in common except for the fact that her mother does quite a lot of charity work for the blind. '

'So you can't exactly tell Vera to get the hell out of your life, ' he remarked dryly, obviously sensing her dislike.

'I'm under no obligation to her, ' Roxy said tritely, and they lapsed once again into that stony silence which lasted until they had arrived at her home.

She felt guilty about her behaviour now as he accompanied her to the door, and she was desperate suddenly to ease the tension between them.

'Marcus, I ‑ '

'I won't come in, if you don't mind, ' he interrupted the hesitant beginnings of her invitation, releasing her arm at the same time. 'I'll call you some time. '

She tried to say something, but couldn't, and moments later a car door slammed before it was driven swiftly from the house. 'I'll call you some time, ' he had said, but Roxy had a sinking feeling that it would be some time never. She sighed as she went inside, and decided that this was just another chapter in her life which she would have to write off as an unfortunate experience.

She was not surprised when Vera put in an appearance early the following morning. Her interest in Marcus had been only too obvious, and Roxy smiled inwardly with a touch of cynicism when quick, light footsteps entered the small room downstairs which she had turned into a workroom for herself.

'Hello, Roxy. It's me—Vera. I just had to come and see you this morning. '

'Oh? ' Roxy remarked, feigning innocence as she sat back in her chair and placed a soothing hand on Sheba's bristling back.

Sheba had never taken to Vera, and her low growl had warned Roxy of Vera's arrival long before she herself had identified those light steps.

'Where on earth did you meet that gorgeous hunk of man you were with yesterday? '

There it was; direct and to the point, and so typical of Vera Sinclair, Roxy thought.

'Is he gorgeous? ' she asked, her innocence tinged with curiosity.

'Oh, Roxy, if only you could see him! ' Vera exclaimed with an ecstatic sigh, and then she drew a sharp, uncomfortable breath. 'Sorry... that was clumsy of me. '

'For heaven's sake, Vera, ' Roxy said irritably. 'I'm well past the stage of being touchy about remarks like that, and you know it. '

'Yes, of course. ' There was the scrape of a chair on the floor as Vera got to her feet. 'Oh, well, I just thought I'd let you know. If you ever get tired of Marcus Fleming, toss him my way, darling. '

A tinkling, almost inane laugh filled the small room, and then Vera's heels were clicking across the floor and growing fainter down the passage and into the hall until the front door closed behind her.

Roxy expelled the air from her lungs, then, for some inexplicable reason, she was laughing, and she was laughing still when Maggie brought in her tea.

'What did Miss Vera want? ' Maggie asked suspiciously.

'She wanted to know more about Marcus Fleming, ' Roxy replied, trying to stifle her laugh behind her hand.

'That Mr Fleming ‑ '

'I know, ' Roxy interrupted humorously. 'He's a gorgeous hunk of man. '

'Who told you that? ' Maggie demanded sharply.

'Vera, ' Roxy laughed. 'She was quite ecstatic about his looks. '

'Are you going to see him again? '

Roxy sobered at once and stirred the tea Maggie had placed on the desk in front of her. 'I don't think so. '

'That would be a pity, Miss Roxy. '

Maggie left the room without explaining her statement, and Roxy was left feeling curiously deflated.

Roxy had little time during that week, and the following, to think much about herself, or Marcus Fleming. Chris Thompson was making a rapid recovery, and she found herself dividing her time at the clinic between him and several other patients, often snatching a light meal at the clinic and remaining until Basil could give her a lift home.

The pressure fortunately eased off towards the end of the second week, and she was in her workroom one morning when Sheba's excited bark interrupted her work. She switched off the tape recorder and removed her earphones.

'Sheba? ' she questioned, wondering whether Sheba had decided it was time to go for a walk, then she sensed someone else's presence in the room with her and asked warily, 'Who is there? '

'Marcus, ' came the abrupt reply. 'Am I welcome? '

'Yes, of course, ' she said quickly, her heart leaping wildly in her breast as he crossed the room and pulled a chair up close to her own.

'It seems to me we parted company on a sour note a few weeks ago. '

'It was my fault, ' she admitted apologetically.

'I seem to remember it was mine for taking unwanted liberties, ' he corrected, and there was the warmth of a smile in his voice.

'Marcus... ' She extended her hands towards him in a silent gesture of appeal, and a warmth rushed into her heart, lifting the corners of her mouth in a smile when those strong fingers clasped hers.

'I rushed the fences a little, ' he said softly. 'Will you allow me a re-take if I promise to take it slow? '

Her smile broadened and, in reply, she asked: 'Will you stay and have tea with me? '

'If you'll have dinner with me this evening, ' he countered swiftly.

'I'm afraid I can't, ' she declined, her heart sinking. 'I promised a little boy at the clinic I'd visit him this evening, and I can't let him down. '

'Then I'll take you there, and we'll have dinner afterwards, ' he offered without hesitation, but Roxy felt disinclined to accept his kind offer after the way she had treated him before.

'I couldn't impose on you in that way, ' she said simply, and the hands which held hers were instantly withdrawn.

'Why don't you just tell me you don't want to have dinner with me, and forget the excuses? ' he demanded harshly, and the waves of anger emanating from him made her shrink inwardly.

'That isn't what I ‑ '

'Hello there! ' a light voice interrupted Roxy's explanation. 'Anyone home? '

'In here, Vera, ' Roxy called back disconsolately, a staying hand going at once to the agitated Sheba's collar.

'I just dropped in for a moment to ‑ ' Her footsteps halted just within the door, and that familiar tinkling laugh tripped off her lips. 'My goodness, I wondered whose Lamborghini was parked in the drive, and it must be yours, of course, Marcus. '

Marcus rose to his feet. 'Good morning, Vera. '

There was a brief silence during which Roxy sensed they were summing each other up, and then Maggie's footsteps could be heard entering the room. 'Tea, Miss Roxy. '

'Thank you, Maggie. '

'Shall I pour, darling? ' Vera offered the moment Maggie had left, and Roxy nodded slightly.

'Please do. '

Vera was in her element, naturally, playing hostess, and she talked incessantly during the next half hour, engaging Marcus in conversation almost to the exclusion of Roxy, then, after a slight pause, she asked casually, 'By the way_s what were you both looking so serious about when I walked in earlier? '

There was an uncomfortable little silence, then Marcus replied in a clipped voice, 'I was trying to persuade Roxy to have dinner with me this evening. '

'Oh, Roxy has this thing about eating out, and she's always been a bit of a stick-in-the-mud, ' Vera told him unkindly and untruthfully and, before Roxy could protest, she added with a beguiling laugh, 'If you need a stand-in, just remember that I live next door. '

'Would you have dinner with me this evening, then? ' Marcus's request surprised Roxy into abject silence.

'Just you try and stop me! ' Vera laughed without hesitation.

'Very well, I'll call for you at seven—and now I must be on my way. ' Marcus stood up and crossed the floor towards the door. 'Thanks for the tea, Roxy. '

'I must be going as well, so I'll come out with you, Marcus, ' Vera said hastily, her heels clicking swiftly across the floor. 'Cheerio, Roxy. See you some time. '

Roxy sat there behind her desk as if turned to stone while she listened to their footsteps growing fainter down the passage. She was stunned, incredulous, and deep down inside her there was a stab of pain that made her frown with angry irritation. What did she care about Marcus Fleming? He could do as he pleased, and was not answerable to her for his behaviour. She got to her feet agitatedly, stumbled over the chair Marcus had carelessly left in her path, and then, stupidly, she knelt down on the floor and cried as if she were a child and someone had run off with her pet toy.

She went to the clinic that afternoon, and again that evening to see Chris, but she found it difficult trying to concentrate on their conversation while her mind was busy thinking of Marcus and Vera together, enjoying a meal somewhere which had initially been intended for her.

'Oh, damn! ' she muttered when she eventually left Chris's ward. 'Pull yourself together, Roxana Cunningham. You're becoming obsessed with Marcus Fleming, and that's the worst tiling you could ever do. '

'Hello, what's up? ' Basil asked laughingly, taking her arm and falling into step beside her. 'I've never known you to talk to yourself before? '

She smiled reluctantly. 'I must be getting old. '

'Nonsense! ' he retorted. 'What you need is a strong cup of tea before I drive you home. '

On their way to his office he ordered a tray of tea, and when it was eventually brought to them he poured and handed her a cup. Under the influence of Basil's charming company and the strong cup of tea, Roxy found herself relaxing and forgetting temporarily about Marcus and Vera while she laughed with him as he passed on some of his patients' funny anecdotes.

Her father was still up when Roxy arrived at the house an hour later and, for the first time in some years, she refused the glass of wine he offered her and went straight up to her room, leaving a baffled Theodore behind in the living-room.

'You sound pretty, ' Chris said the following afternoon when she sat talking to him on the lawn in the gardens of the clinic. 'I wish I could see you. '

Roxy smiled to herself. 'You could always see me with your hands. '

'How? '

'Like this, ' she said and, finding his hands, she raised them to her face. 'Explore my face with your fingertips. Go on, don't be shy. '

Small, cool fingers trailed hesitantly across her features, and finally came to rest against her lips. 'Are you smiling? ' he asked uncertainly.

Roxy's smile broadened as she murmured, 'Yes, I am. '

'Your skin is soft, ' he announced, trailing his fingers across her cheeks once more, then she felt him lean closer to sniff at her lightly. 'And you always smell so nice. '

'You're getting very clever at being blind, ' she laughed softly.

'It's funny, but ‑ ' Chris paused, removing his hands from her face.

'What's funny? ' she prompted when the silence lengthened between them.

The child sighed and laughed a little self-consciously. 'When I'm with you, Roxy, I'm not scared any more. '

Roxy's heart warmed to him. 'There's never any need to be afraid, Chris. No matter who you're with. '

'My bandages are coming off tomorrow, ' he said eventually, and some of his anxiety was transferred to her. 'I don't think I'll mind so much any more if I never see again, but. .. will you be here when Dr Vaughn takes them off? '

'If you want me to, I will. '

There was the rustle of a starched uniform, then the nursing Sister's authoritative voice said: 'It's getting chilly out, Chris, and it's almost time for Dr Vaughn's visit. '

Chris sighed, but said goodbye to Sheba and rose obediently to his feet. 'You'll be here tomorrow, Roxy? Promise? '

'I'll be here, Chris, and that's a promise, ' she replied calmly. 'Go along with the Sister now. '

The sound of the starched uniform grew fainter, then Roxy placed an arm about Sheba's neck and said tiredly, 'It's time we went home too, Sheba. '

'Want a lift? ' a deep, familiar voice asked directly behind her, and Roxy's nerves coiled into a knot at the pit of her stomach as she rose slowly to her feet and turned towards him.

'Marcus? ' she murmured his name questioningly.

'At your service. '

She suddenly felt incredibly nervous as she said: 'Maggie will be here to fetch me any minute now. '

'No, she won't, ' Marcus contradicted. 'I telephoned the house and told her I'd be collecting you. '

She felt confused, bewildered, and the strained silence did nothing to relieve her tension. 'Why are you here? ' she finally asked.

'I've been invited to dinner, and your father tells me you play an excellent game of chess, ' he said, confusing her more, then his hand was on her arm, sending those little shivers of awareness through her. 'My car is this way. '

They walked across the lawn in silence towards the car park, and Roxy was assisted into the front seat. Sheba willingly climbed into the back, then Marcus walked round to the other side and climbed in beside Roxy.

'Well? ' he demanded harshly, slamming the door behind him, but not starting the car. 'Why don't you say what's on your mind? '

There were several things she could have said, but suddenly they seemed childish and quite unnecessary. 'I have nothing to say, ' she told him warily.

'Well, I have plenty to say to you, ' he exploded with a violence that made her shrink back against the door. 'Firstly... when I asked you to come out with me yesterday, it was because I desired your company, and I wouldn't have offered to bring you here to the clinic if I'd considered it an inconvenience. Secondly... I took Vera up on her suggestion that she'd act as a stand-in because I was so damnably angry with you that I wanted to hurt you in some way. Thirdly...

someone really ought to tell that young lady that, even in this permissive age, men still prefer to do the running. And lastly... ' he drew a sharp, angry breath that made her wince inwardly, 'take those damn glasses off when you're with me so I can see your eyes! '

They were removed roughly from her face as he spoke, and suddenly her vulnerability made her resort to anger. 'You have no right to speak to me like this, ' she accused coldly. 'You chose to misunderstand me yesterday, but that's beside the point. Whom you choose to spend your time with is also entirely your own affair, and I would prefer it if, after this evening, we don't meet again. '

'Right! ' Marcus said sharply, thrusting her glasses back on to her face. 'Then we understand each other at last! '

Sheba whined softly in the back of the car, sensing something in the atmosphere, then she, too, fell silent as Marcus started the car and drove away from the clinic.

During the drive out to Houghton the antagonistic atmosphere between them became almost explosive, and Roxy was ridiculously close to tears when he finally parked his car in front of her home. She could not spend the rest of the evening in his company with this tension between them, and when he switched off the engine she turned in her seat towards him.

They started speaking simultaneously, broke off abruptly, tried again, and finally gave up when they were reduced to laughter.

'Do we call a truce? ' he asked at last.

'Yes... please, ' she whispered, relief choking her.

He removed her glasses gently this time, drawing a sharp breath when he saw the tears brimming her eyes, and then she found herself in his arms with her head being pressed into his shoulder. His masculine cologne was in her nostrils while his warm breath fanned her cheek, and suddenly it seemed so right to be there close against him.

'I'm a cad! I know it! ' he grunted, stroking her hair away from her face. 'Let's try again, shall we? '

She nodded, her throat too tight to speak, and they sat like that for some time until Sheba whined impatiently and tried to push her nose between them.

They laughed as they drew apart, then Marcus remarked with mock sadness in his voice, 'Ah, Sheba, you've just ruined a beautiful moment. '

Sheba whined and barked in response as if she had understood, and Roxy reached over to the back to stroke her.

'Don't worry, Sheba, ' she laughed happily. 'Marcus was only teasing you. '

The evening turned out to be pleasant and relaxing. After dinner her father brought out the chessboard and set it up on a low table between Marcus and Roxy, then he sat back, literally rubbing his hands together with satisfaction as Marcus set about beating Roxy at the game.

When Marcus finally announced that it was 'checkmate' Theodore exclaimed delightedly, and clapped his hands, but instead of being embarrassed, Roxy felt oddly pleased that Marcus had won.

Theodore poured wine and they talked for some time until he was called out unexpectedly to a client, then Roxy found herself alone with Marcus, and she was inexplicably nervous for some reason.

She sensed more than heard him approach her chair, then her hands were taken and she was drawn to her feet.

'I was watching you while we had dinner this evening, ' he said, ushering her towards the sofa and seating himself beside her. 'Was Vera telling the truth? Do you feel embarrassed about eating in public? '

A slow smile curved her mouth. 'I've been blind for ten years, Marcus. I think I've mastered the art of eating without embarrassing those who are with me, don't you? '

'I agree entirely, but Vera said ‑ '

'She was having fun at my expense, ' Roxy interrupted a little bitterly.

His fingers tightened about hers. 'Do I take it then that you'll dine out with me one evening soon? '

'If you feel inclined to ask me again, yes. '

'Tomorrow evening? '

'Isn't that a bit too soon? ' she teased, but when he remained silent, she added hastily, 'Please, I'm not trying to find excuses. '

'If tomorrow is too soon, then what about Saturday evening? ' he suggested, and Roxy could find no reason to refuse.

'I'd like that, ' she replied, conscious of a hard thigh against her own.

'Seven o'clock? '

'Yes. '

They talked quietly after that, about the things he hoped to achieve in the business he had inherited from his uncle, and although her awareness of him grew, her nervousness evaporated, and she felt strangely disappointed when he finally said goodnight and left.

She lay thinking about him for a long time that night, her desire not to become too deeply involved fighting against the strange attraction she felt for him. It was a dangerous attraction, and she knew instinctively that she could get hurt, but was it not worth the chance she was rafting? Was it worth risking her peace of mind to become involved with a man like Marcus Fleming who could never endure being tied down to someone like herself? There were so many questions rushing through her mind, and for none of them could she find an answer. Perhaps the only solution would be to wait, and allow circumstances to develop in whatever direction they pleased.

Roxy slipped behind the screens in the children's ward of the clinic the following afternoon. Basil was there, and the ward Sister, but the young boy in the high bed had recognised her light step.

'Roxy? ' he whispered anxiously.

'I'm here, Chris, ' she assured him hastily.

'Hold my hand. '

She found his hand and held it tightly between her own as Basil proceeded to snip away at the bandages.

'Just relax, young fellow, ' Basil warned when Chris began to fidget. 'We'll have these bandages off soon. '

'Where's my mum and dad? ' Chris asked unexpectedly.

'They're waiting outside, ' Basil told him. 'Do you want me to tell them to come in? '

'No, ' Chris said a little anxiously. 'Not yet. '

'Right, ' said Basil at length, and the scissors ceased their snipping. 'Open your eyes, Chris. Just take it easy, and don't expect too much at first. '

'It isn't so dark any more, ' Chris announced excitedly, his fingers tightening about Roxy's. 'There's something moving. It's your hand. I can see it now, and it's getting clearer. '

'That's wonderful, ' Basil laughed softly.

'Roxy, I can see! ' Chris laughed, his young voice vibrating with excitement. 'I can see just a little, but I can see, and... oh, you're pretty! '

'Oh, Chris.. Roxy swallowed down the lump in her throat, 'I'm so happy for you. '

The ward Sister had called in Mr and Mrs Thompson, and in the excitement Roxy stepped aside and whispered to Basil, 'I'll wait out in the corridor. '

In the passage outside the ward Roxy leaned against the wall and unobtrusively brushed away her tears with the tips of her fingers. She was a fool to cry, but she was happy for Chris, and—yes, she had to admit it—more than a little envious. It would be cowardly to hide from the truth—her father had taught her that. 'Be honest with yourself, ' he had told her once when she had rebelled against her blindness. 'When you admit your failings to yourself, then you can face them and conquer them. '

She was being honest with herself now. The old rebellion had stirred within her once again, but she had clamped down on it hastily. She envied Chris, but she was happy for him, and her happiness outweighed her envy at that moment. She did not wish upon the child those years of struggling to overcome the mental and physical obstacles caused by blindness. Independence was difficult to obtain, and even now she was not entirely independent.

Approaching footsteps interrupted her thoughts, and she recognised the ward Sister's voice inviting her to join her for tea in her office. It was there that Basil found her some minutes later.

'Chris's parents wanted to see you, but you'd vanished, ' he told her, accepting a cup of tea from the Sister.

'I thought it best to leave them alone together, ' Roxy smiled a little unsteadily.

'Chris is asking for you. '

She nodded slowly. 'I suppose he'll go home soon. ' 'He's going home tomorrow. '

'I'll miss him, ' she said sadly.

'Believe it or not, ' Basil laughed, 'so will I. '

Roxy finished her tea and returned to the ward to see Chris for the last time. The screens had been removed from around his bed, and with Basil no longer there, the children were noisy with exuberance.

'Roxy, ' said Chris as she approached his bed, 'I'm going home tomorrow. '

'I know. '

'Dr Vaughn says I'll have to wear glasses, but he thinks my eye will get stronger. '

'I'm sure it will. '

He was silent for a moment, and then she felt his small hand slipping into hers. 'I'm going to miss you, Roxy. '

She swallowed the rising lump in her throat and laughed with forced gaiety. 'No, you're not! You're going to return to school one of these days, and then you'll be with all your friends once more. '

'I won't forget you, and I won't forget Sheba, ' he insisted with a certain stubbornness that was touching.

'It will be nice to be remembered, ' she admitted eventually, fighting against the tears that threatened. 'Sheba and I won't forget you either. '

When Maggie drove Roxy home that afternoon, she did not question the tears that flowed from behind those dark glasses on to Roxy's cheeks, but she did produce a wad of tissues for the mopping-up process before they arrived at the house.

'It's never easy saying goodbye, ' her father had once told her when he found her crying after saying farewell to a patient. 'But tomorrow there'll be someone else for you to worry about, and then the others will be forgotten to a certain extent. '

Wise words, Roxy realised, but Chris had somehow crept right into her heart, and she suspected it was going to take a little longer to forget him.

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