Prologue 7 страница

“Yep. So, don’t feel sorry for her. She doesn’t regret it. In fact she went back to school two years later and finished her two year degree and then started work at the firm with everyone else. She loves it. ”

“Your parents didn’t try to make her have an abortion? ”

“No. They wouldn’t but I think they thought what she did. That she’d never get the chance for a baby otherwise and if that’s what she wanted, they’d support her for it. ”

“Wow. ”

“That’s like your favorite word, huh? ” he teased and chuckled.

“Oh yeah. ” I bet I sound so young and stupid. “I just can’t believe that she-”

“I was just joking. ” He put his arm around my shoulder and squeezed me to him. “It’s cute. I like it, a lot actually. ”

“Cute? ” I said playfully incredulous.

“Yep. Cute. ”

“I’m not sure if that’s a compliment or not, ” I said and leaned away in mock distress.

He grinned and followed me as I inched away laughing, he inched closer.

“Oh, it’s a compliment. ” I came to the edge of the seat and stopped. But he didn’t. He smooshed right up next to me and smiled deviously down at me. “Where you gonna go now, cutie? ”

“Um. Away. ”

I bolted from him and took off down the boardwalk.

I heard him chuckle and then footsteps pounding behind me on the wood planks. The moon was bright and there was plenty of light to see him. He chased me and was fast but so was I. I was on the track team for crying out loud.

“Hey! Jeez, you’re fast. ”

“I’m sorry you can’t keep up, ” I yelled as I ran backwards. “I figured a big bad swimmer could handle a little jog. ”

“Ooooh. ” He feigned anger. “You are so gonna get it now! ”

“You have to catch me first, slow poke! ”

“Ok! Ok. I give! ” he called out and bent down to rest his hands on his knees.

I came back to him slowly and stood next to him.

“Hmm. I’m not sure I can be seen with you anymore. I’m thoroughly disappoint-Ah! ” He grabbed me around my stomach from behind and lifted me, swinging me around. “You tricked me! ”

He pressed his face to my ear.

“And you totally fell for it, too. ”

This savored strongly of the vision I had had of us when we imprinted. His breath on my ear, so close to my neck... I felt goose bumps glide down my skin rapidly and instantly blushed because I knew he could feel them too.

“Yeah, I guess I did, ” I said but it was all wrong and breathless.

He set my feet to the ground but didn’t let me go, his hands moved to my upper arms. We stood looking out at the lake for a minute. I could feel every breath he took behind me. I pressed into his mind, focusing on him, to see what he was thinking. He was wondering the same about me. I could feel his pulse in my veins and it was faster than normal. I took some comfort that he was just as affected by my presence as I was by his.

“I think I’m more affected if you ask me, ” he said suddenly.

“You are getting really good at that, ” I said dryly.

He laughed softly.

“You get better at it the more time we spend together. You’ll only block me when you’re trying to. Soon, you’ll be able to pick up exact thoughts too, not just my feelings. ”

“Are you nervous about your ascension? Getting your abilities? ”

“Nah. I’ve waited for this all my life. Are you nervous? ”

“Terrified, ” I breathed truthfully.

He turned me in his arms to look at my face, his arms held me firmly to him.

“Don’t be. It’s not that painful. ”

“Not that painful? ”

“Yeah. And the chills, fever and convulsions only last a couple days. ”

“What? ” I said and even though he was touching me, I felt a spike of terror.

“Yeah, but don’t worry. The little green spots that appear all over are mostly under your clothes. ”

I gaped at him and he smiled widely and cockily.

“Caleb! ” I pushed at his chest playfully. “I believed you. ”

“I know, I’m sorry. ” He hugged me to him so I couldn’t see his face as he spoke into my hair. “You really think I’d be so happy about something that would hurt you and I couldn’t fix it? ”

“I don’t know what to think. ”

“I don’t want you to be scared about it. It’s a good thing and it doesn’t hurt at all. And it won’t happen if I’m not around. ” He pulled back to look at me. His hands moved down, slid really, to rest on my lower back and I thought my pulse couldn’t possibly race more than it was already. “We’ll be together and I’ll know exactly what’s happening so don’t be scared. My parents said it feels kinda like the imprinting. You feel hot and cold, your heart races. Our abilities will compliment the other’s so we’ll be even more in tune and drawn to each other after that. ”

“I don’t see how that’s possible, ” I muttered and then realized I’d said it out loud. I pressed my lips together and he smiled. “So, you’ll be with me when it happens and it won’t hurt? ”

“I’ll be with you and it won’t hurt, ” he assured and his hands flexed on my back.

“Ok. So what do you think you’re ability will be? ”

“No clue. But none of us have the same ability. So it will be something that no one else in the family has. ”

“Can it be something like making honey buns appear out of thin air, because I could get used to that. ”

He laughed and pulled me closer, pressing his forehead to mine.

“I don’t think so, cutie. ”

“Dang, ” I whispered.

We sat for a few minutes just like that, eyes closed. I breathed him in and enjoyed the feeling of clarity and calm from his touch.

“Are you ready to go home yet? ”

“No. But I guess I better. It’s getting late. ”

“Here, ” his hands went inside my jacket and he pushed my arm through the sleeve. “Better zip this up. It’s dark so it’ll be even colder on the bike. ”

I let him pull both my arms through and zip my jacket up before he took my hand and we made our way back to the parking lot.

“I picked a good day to wear a dress, huh. ”

“It may not be practical but you look very pretty. ”

“Thanks. So, um. ” I had wanted to ask him this question since I first found out about all this but couldn’t get up the nerve. “Do you-” I sighed.

“What is it? ”

“Do you, uh, feel withdrawals like I do? ”

“Of course, yeah. Significants always feel withdrawals for each other, especially in the beginning. ”

“But are they like mine? I mean, this morning I thought I was having a heart attack or something. ”

“Well, ” we made it to the bike and he leaned against it, “no, from what Gran says, humans feel it a lot more than we do. This morning I felt sick and sore, just like you said, like I had the flu. It sucked but I knew what was going on and got to you as soon as I could but I wasn’t in pain. I’m really sorry about that. I’ll be there sooner tomorrow. ”

“It’s ok. I think it’ll be better tomorrow now that I understand what’s going on. ”

“So, that’s what you wanted to ask me? ” he asked and looked unconvinced.

“Not all of it. I-” I so didn’t want to say the words.

Then a thought hit me. He could read my thoughts earlier, my actual thought. I decided to try it again. I thought about how I feel when he touches me. How I feel calm and collected and have no worries. I wondered if he felt that way with me. If my touch calms him and makes him feel better like his does me. Like a balm to soothe and comfort.

I pushed my thoughts to him and watched his face to see if he heard me. He looked at me expectantly and then his mouth opened. He looked shocked and surprised. He smiled and laughed.

“You did that all by yourself. I wasn’t even trying to read you! ” I smiled too, enjoying his happiness as he moved to stand in front of me. “Wow. You are amazing, you know that? You’re constantly surprising me. But even with that, I feel like I’ve known you my whole life. ” I stood listening and looking at him in complete agreement of what he was saying and complete awe at how we seemed to always be feeling the same thing. Then he pushed my hair behind my ear as he stepped a little closer. “And to answer your question, yes. Every time I touch you, it’s like a switch is flipped. I do touch you a lot when I feel your anxiety, but I do it for me too. It’s like everything that was wrong is right and it’ll all be fine if I can just touch you. It takes everything away that I don’t want to feel. I could touch you all day long. ” And as to demonstrate, he let his fingertips coast down my cheek. “I can’t believe I only met you yesterday. ”

“Me neither, ” I breathed and then sighed. “And you won’t see me tomorrow if we don’t get me home before midnight. ”

“Right. Yeah, let’s get going, ” he said hurriedly, not liking the outcome of that.

He put on our helmets and climbed on, then I hopped on behind him.

“Hang on, gorgeous. I’m not taking it easy on you this time, ” he said, my heart flipped and I heard him laugh trough the helmet.

Whether it was because he could hear my thought or he could feel my excitement through my heartbeat, I didn’t know but didn’t care.

“Ok. ”

“You trust me? ” he asked as he cranked it up and I gripped him tight around his stomach. I could feel his muscles were hard and bunched through his shirt.

“I trust you. ”

We rode in almost silence the way home, except for the occasional squeal from me. I let him ride as fast and as crazy as he wanted to. I was scared sometimes, especially on the curves where we leaned the bike into them, but I was having just as much fun too. I’d laugh and I’d hear him laughing too, through the helmet mics. He’d reach up and grip my hand or sometimes he’d reach back and rub my knee to soothe me and I felt instantly calm yet excited at his touch at the same time.

We pulled up in front of my house with twenty three minutes to spare. I got off and handed him his helmet and jacket. He took his helmet off too and we stood by the bike for a minute as I thanked him again for dinner and he thanked me for going.

I wondered again if he was going to try to kiss me.

“Alright, I better let you go. I’ll be here first thing in the morning. ”

“Ok. I’ll see you then. ”

I started to go but he stopped me by grabbing my hand.

“Maggie. I just need one more thing. ” He pulled me close and I knew this was it. He was going to kiss me, but he didn’t. He pressed his forehead to mine and his arms went around me. “I just needed to touch you one more time, ” he confessed softly, kissed my cheek and ran his hand down my arm. “You’re so soft, ” he said too quietly, more to himself.

“Thanks, ” I muttered breathlessly and lamely.

“Bye, Maggie. ”

“Bye, ” I said but couldn’t take a step to go. “Caleb. ”

He glanced at me.

“I’m sorry, ” he said sincerely. “It’ll get easier, I promise. Maggie, I want you to go inside and get some sleep. Don’t worry about anything. I’ll see in the morning, I promise. And I can’t wait. ”

Then somehow I turned and made it to the steps, albeit wobbling and stumbling in my stupor. It was actually painful to watch him mount the bike and drive away. My gut twisted and pulled as I closed the door and leaned my back against it. My feet tingled and begged to take off running after him. I closed my eyes and took a deep breath, smiling and remembered his words to me about seeing me in the morning.

I pushed off the door and stepped into the foyer and saw my dad, sitting at the kitchen table.

“Did you have a good time? ”

I was flabbergasted. What was up with him?

“Uh, yeah. Sure, dad. ”

“Not too good I hope. ”

“Dad. Eew, ” I said as I poured myself a glass of water.

“I’m still your father, Maggie. You may not like it but you are not an adult yet. I want you to be careful with that boy. And I don’t remember you getting permission to ride on a motorcycle. ”

“I didn’t think I needed permission. He had a helmet and jacket for me. He’s very responsible. ”

“I’m sure, but that’s not the point. ”

“What is the point, dad? ”

“That you’re seventeen and still live under my roof. You can’t just do whatever you want to do. ”

“I’m not. I told you I was going out and you said it was fine. ”

He grunted and ran both his hands through his hair.

“That’s not what I’m talking about. ”
“What are you talking about? ” I asked exasperated.

“Look, I-” He choked on his words.

Like really choked up. His head bowed and he sniffed. I saw his shoulders shake. His hand came up to swipe his face and I couldn’t take it anymore. I walked swiftly to him and knelt down in front of him.

“Aw, dad. What is it? ”

“Maggie. I am so sorry. ”

“What for, dad? ”

He looked at me closely.

“I did everything I could for your mother. She was everything to me. And then you came along and you were everything too. My girls. Then your mom left for no reason, out of the blue and took everything with her. She was spiteful and hateful. She didn’t care what happened to you or me and I couldn’t handle it. I loved her with everything I had and she gave me no reason, no real reason, for leaving. Just that I held her back. I don’t know what I did to her and I know that I’ve been a horrible person, let alone father, to you lately. I was bitter and nasty. I know you’ve been angry with me-for good reason. You just look so much like her and are so independent, I just assumed you didn’t need me or didn’t want me like she didn’t. ” He took my face in his hands, the first time he’s touched me at all in almost a year and I saw another tear roll down his chin. “But I love you so much. It took me seeing you walking out that door with someone who could actually take you away for me to remember that. I’m so sorry, Maggie. ”

He hugged me to him tightly, crushed me to him really. My body was rebelling. It wanted to remind me of all the things he had said to me. All the things he needed to have done or said and didn’t. He let his grief over my mom ruin his life and I let my grief for him ruin mine.

I felt utterly at his mercy. My heart ached with wanting. I wanted him to be telling the truth so badly that it hurt. I needed him, as much as I took care of myself, I still needed my dad.

“Maggie, please forgive me. I know you’re about to turn eighteen and you’ll probably be leaving home soon. I can’t live with knowing how I’ve hurt you without trying to fix it. ”

He sniffed again and pulled back to look at me.

“Dad, I understand. I do. I know it sucked for us both when mom left but you more than me. She was my mom but your wife. It’s different, I know that. But I’ve missed you. ”

“I’ve missed you too. I’m so sorry. ” He hugged me to him. “I love you, baby girl. ”

“I love you too, daddy. ”

“I have an idea. Why don’t we go to the boathouse? I’m sure that old place is still available. We can just spend some time away, you and me? ”

Before I could balk at his idea-for he knew nothing of my predicament with Caleb-the doorbell rang.

I went to answer it and peeked out the peephole.

Caleb. And he looked nervous.

I opened the door. He sighed with relief and pulled me to him.

“Oh, thank God. You heart was going nuts and I could feel you were upset. I thought something was wrong. ” He pulled back to look at me and wiped a tear from my cheek. I didn’t even realize I’d been crying. “You are upset. What’s wrong? What happened? ”

“My dad and I were just... patching things up, I guess. ”

I heard my dad coming and pulled from Caleb’s grasp, painful as it was.

“Maggie, it’s midnight. Who in the world could it... be? ” Dad stopped in the doorway and stared with a mixture of curiosity and annoyance. “Caleb. It’s kinda late, son. ”

“Yes, sir. I uh... just needed to check on something. ”

“What’s that? ”

“Dad, ” I interrupted. “Caleb forgot to tell me what time he was coming tomorrow. He wanted to make sure it wasn’t too early. ”

“Well, Caleb. I think, ” he put his arm around me, “Maggie and I decided to head up to the lake for a couple weeks. So, she might not see you for a while. ”

Just saying the words letting alone thinking about it sent my body is a panic. I gasp and let out a little cry of distress to my embarrassment but I had no control.

My dad looked at me sideways as Caleb stepped a little closer.

“Sir, please don’t do that. I, um, have a few things that I asked Maggie to help me with, before I go back to school. It’s kinda important. ”

It wasn’t completely a lie.

Caleb’s hand snaked out slowly and low to touch the ends of my fingers with his and him and I both sighed. I looked up to his face, he was just as upset as I was about the prospect of not seeing me. So much for no trouble with my dad.

“Yeah, dad, ” I insisted. Dad glared at Caleb’s fingers as he caressed mine. “Please. I’d love to go with you but I already promised Caleb I’d be here. ”

“Alright, ” he said stiffly. “But I don’t want you spending every day, all day with each other. It’s not good for you, especially if he’s leaving for school in a few weeks and leaving you here. ”

Another jolt of pain ran through me.

“Dad, please don’t say that, ” I almost moaned.

“Sorry. But it’s true. The sooner you break it off, the better in my opinion. ” I bit the inside of my cheek to keep from screaming at him. “Alright. Say goodnight to Caleb. ”

Oh crap. I couldn’t move. Caleb had to release me or whatever it is that he does to let me leave him and my dad was standing right here. Oh crap!

“Maggie, ” Caleb said immediately, I assumed he realized what I just had and I locked my eyes to his. “Go up and rest. We have a busy day tomorrow. I’m sorry I bothered you but I’ll see you in the morning, ok? ”

I nodded.

“Ok. ”

He waited to see if that was enough to help me go and when he saw me turn he blew a grateful breath and smiled. He waved to my dad and said a goodnight as my dad shut the door.

“That’s a strange boy, Maggie. Are you sure he’s who you want to waste your summer on? ”

“Dad. ”

“Ok. Ok. I’m going to go to bed. I have a lot to think about and an early start at the mill tomorrow. Goodnight, baby girl. ”

“Goodnight, dad. And I really appreciate you telling me all that before. I’ve been really worried about you. ”

“I know and I’m sorry. But things are gonna be back to normal around here. You’ll see. I love you, Maggie. ”

“Love you too, dad. ”

I smiled and made my way up the stairs to my bed. I had texts from Bish and Beck both and answered them eagerly. Once I had gone back and forth with them both for about half and hour I laid down and thought about dad’s new awakening. The ‘event’ was just something of the past.

In my opinion, and even though things were looking up, or down depending on how you looked at it, morning couldn’t get here fast enough.

Ten

I woke with the same aches and pains as the day before. But this time I understood them. Unfortunately for me, it didn’t make them better. My head pounded, my back and stomach groaned and pulsed with painful jolts. My legs wobbled when I tried to climb out of bed.

I glanced at my alarm clock. Six fifty five. Pretty early. Caleb said he’d be here earlier than yesterday so all I had to do was wait it out. I went to the mirror on my dresser and saw the same ashen and sickly skin as before as I looked past the stars in my vision. I decided I should change out of my pajamas for when Caleb would be here. But wasn’t fast enough.

I heard the doorbell and my legs were wobbly no longer. They propelled me forward and down the stairs as quick as I could make it. I yanked open the door... only to find Kyle. My heart sank painfully at seeing it wasn’t Caleb and I collapsed against the doorframe and slid to the floor as the ache in my bones engulfed me.

Kyle came and yanked me up into his arms and held me tight. Then he whispered into my ear.

“Maggie. I’m so sorry. I got here as soon as I could. ”

“Where’s Caleb? ”

“Who’s Caleb? ”

I pushed him away and stared at him incredulously.

“That’s not funny, Kyle. ”

“Here. ” He reached for me again. “Maggie, I know you’re withdrawing. I am too. Come here, you need me. ”
“What? ”

“Maggie, it’s just the withdrawals. Touch my hand and everything will be ok. ”

“Kyle, I am not your significant. What are you doing here? Where’s Caleb? ”

He looked hurt and shocked. He started muttering to himself.

“Dad never told me about this. I thought you’d need me, right away. I didn’t think you’d fight me and hallucinate. ”

“I’m not hallucinating! ” I yelled. “Where’s Caleb? ”

“Mags, ” he said more pronounced. “Who is Caleb? ”

I started to falter. Had I just imagined it all? Kyle looked serious. He looked startled. He looked hurt and his eyes beseeched me to take his hand. I didn’t know what was going on but I held my hand out and let him grasp it. His fingers were cold and rough, not like Caleb’s and his touch didn’t calm me or sooth me. In fact, it made my skin crawl.

“Maggie. What are you doing? You’re blocking me somehow. Let me help you. ”

“I’m not doing anything. Kyle, come on. Where’s Caleb? I need him, he’s the one. This isn’t right, ” I yanked from him and pleaded.

Even I heard the hysteria in my voice and I turned away from his betrayed expression.

Kyle pressed his mouth to my ear.

“Caleb can’t come out and play right now, ” the voice said but it was no longer Kyle’s voice. It was deeper, more menacing and definitely not nice. “Neither can Kyle. Sorry. ”

I turned, looking around but saw no one.

“Who are you? ”

“You don’t remember? I’m hurt, Maggie, really, ” the voice sang with sarcasm.

He appeared in front of me from the shadows off the porch and smiled as he saw recognition flash in my face.

“Marcus, ” I gasped. I backed into the wall. “You scared me. What are you doing here? ”

“Oh, I scared you? Well, you’re scaring me. You see, you’re special. Not like in a get-a-big-head special, but special enough for us to be pissed about it. It’s not fair that the Jacobson clan gets to start getting their ascensions back when we’ve been just as patient as they have. They will have the upper hand now, you see? We’ve have had many a discussion about you in my clan. There is a reason for you, there has to be. There’s something special about you and we can’t let it come to pass. ”

“What? You can’t let what come to pass? ” I asked but was afraid of the answer.

“Your ascension. If we take you away from Caleb, you won’t ascend and neither will he. ”

I gasped with pain at the thought.

“You can’t do that! I’ll die. ”

He laughed manically.

“You won’t die, silly human! ” He laughed again. “You’ll be in agony, but you won’t die. Well not at first, anyway. That’s a sacrifice we’re willing to make. ”

“No, please, ” I whispered my plea.

There was nothing else to do. He pointed outside. I saw a black car waiting on the curb for us.

“Get in. ”

“No! No! Please! ”

“Too late for that. If only you hadn’t saved him. This is your fault, I want to make sure that you see that. He will be in just as much pain as you, you know. He’ll writhe in wanting and agony just as you will, with no cure. Now, how’s your conscience? ”

“What did Caleb ever do to you to make you hate him so much? ” I ground out.

“He was born, ” he growled and then we were standing beside the car and I had no idea how we got there.

He grabbed me around my arm and threw me into the darkness of the open car door.

I screamed and scrambled to get a footing but there was none. I fell farther and farther into a dark place of nothing. I felt nothing, I heard, smelled, nor saw anything. Except the burning black handprint on my arm and when I finally hit the bottom, a loud boom.

I was jolted awake in my bed like I’d been dropped. I was sweating and crying. I reached up to my cheeks and felt the wetness and then the aches in my body pounded into me. It was almost too much. Even though I knew what was happening, I wanted to freak out and cry more from the pain.

I heard the doorbell in the back of my mind, heard voices. I laid on my bed and tried to catch my breath but it felt like I was suffocating as the stars danced in my vision.

Then I felt a hand on my forehead and wanted to sigh until I realized it wasn’t the hand I needed. It wasn’t Caleb. I opened my eyes to see dad looking at me with clear worry, the stars bouncing in my vision behind him.

“Honey, Caleb’s downstairs but I’m gonna go tell him you’re sick. You’re burning up. ”

“No, dad! I need him! ” I yelled and kicked off the covers.

“Maggie. ” He scoffed and held me down. “Look. I know you like this boy, but he can wait a day to see you if you’re sick. ”

“No. Please. Caleb, ” I breathed painfully.

“I’m right here. ”

He actually pushed my father aside to get to me. Pushed!

His hands were on either side of my face and I almost cried with relief. Everything felt normal and right and I could breath again. Except for when I opened my eyes and saw how pissed my father was.

“Excuse me, son. But I think you need to leave, right now, ” he boomed.

“Dad, wait. Listen-”

“You be quiet. No boy is coming into my home and pushing me around while he jumps into my daughter’s bed in the morning like it was completely normal. What have you done, Maggie? ”

“Nothing-”

“Sir, ” Caleb butted in as he set me and him up on the bed beside each other. He kept his arm around me, for contact and I felt his protection seeping out. Even though this was my dad, my dad was pretty red faced. “I’m really sorry. I just heard Maggie so upset and I panicked. I shouldn’t have pushed you. ”

“You’re da-darn right you shouldn’t have! I don’t know who you think you are but-”

“Dad. He said he was sorry, ” I said and he looked at me finally.

Then he cocked his head and pressed the backs of his fingers to my forehead and then down my cheek.

“What happened to your fever? You looked like death warmed over when I came in here. ”

“I feel fine, ” I said and shrugged, trying to seem nonchalant.

“Hmmm. ” He looked between us. “You can go with Caleb today but he is not to come over so early in the morning like this anymore. Understand? ”

“Dad-” I started to argue but Caleb squeezed me and interrupted me.

“That’s fine, sir. Thank you for understanding. I am sorry. ”

“Fine. Whatever. You be careful with her on that deathtrap of yours. ” He turned to go but then pointed his finger at him. “And if I ever catch her on it without a helmet, so help me-”

“No, sir. Never. I promise you that. ”

“Fine, ” he said and huffed out of the room.

I turned to Caleb and reached my fingers around his neck just to have the contact and then started to protest about his non-protest.

“How can you say you won’t come over in the mornings? ”

“I will, he just won’t know it, ” he whispered and smiled conspiratorially.

“Oh. ”

He pulled me close to him, hugging me to him and inhaled deeply from my neck, his nose grazing my skin.

“Wow, you smell good, ” he muttered and nestled closer. My heart rioted in my chest. My hand was still on his neck and I felt my fingers pulse with need to bury them in his hair. “And you look very cute in pajamas. ”