Prologue 5 страница

“I’m so sorry. They’re all crazy. Don’t judge me by them, please, ” he joked as he pulled me chair out for me.

The birds were jabbering as we sat under the shade of a huge oak in the backyard. I looked around at his family as they all passed the dishes around, laughing, talking, bickering. It all looked so perfect. I missed it, though I’d never had this before, I missed it something fierce.

“Are you kidding? Your family is so great. I’d give anything to have a big family like this. I mean, you all drove over here to see Kyle graduate, right? ” I asked and he nodded.

I smiled remembering Kyle’s cheering and clapping section and his obvious enjoyment of it as his name was called. I’d never know what that felt like.

Caleb leaned in to whisper in my ear.

“Yes you will. They are your family now, too. ”

I looked over and his face was so close our noses almost bumped. My heart galloped and I turned back to focus on my garlic bread. I decided I needed to talk to him. Understand him. Know him. I knew he went to Tennessee and was studying to be an architect, other than that, I had no clue.

“So, you live with your family? ”

“Yeah. When I’m not at school I stay with my parents about thirty five miles from here. When I’m at school, I have a little apartment there. ”

“And, Maria’s mom is your sister? ”

“Yep. Jen. ”

“What does she do? ”

“She works with us. ”

“Us? ”

He looked at me and warred with whether to tell me or not.

“We all work together. Our great great grandfather started Jacobson Buildings and Things Architecture. It grew and it’s now it’s a pretty big company. ”

“So, you all go to school to be architects and go work for the family firm? ”

“Pretty much. ”

“What if you didn’t want to be an architect? ”

“You could be an accountant, lawyer or secretary. Anything you wanted as long as you work for the company. There’s a lot that goes into a big business like that. ”

“Ok. So what if you didn’t want to work for them? ”

“Uh. I’m not sure. That’s all we’ve ever done. That way we can stay together and, work together. We all have knowledge of how to take care of the family in case something happened to one of us. Everyone’s taken care of. It’s a security thing. ”

I nodded.

“So, when do you go back to school? ”

“Aug 1^st. ”

“That’s eight weeks, ” I sighed.

“Yep. ” He looked at me and rubbed his chin. “I talked to my uncle and he’s agreed, in fact he insisted, I stay here with them until I go back to school. That way I’ll be closer to you. ”

“And when you do go back to school? ” I asked softly.

He leaned close.

“One thing at a time, Maggie. ”

“Yeah. Ok. So, now what? ”

“Well, it’s Saturday. I was going to ask if you wanted to do something with me tonight. ”

“Yes, ” I said a little too quickly and rolled my eyes at myself.

He laughed softly and scooted his hand close to mine on the table, a few of his fingers grazing over my knuckles.

“Great. We can go see your dad if you need to ask him first. ”

“Nah, ” I mumbled, relishing the way my mind clears of anything negative every time he touched me. “He won’t care. ”

“You sure? ”

“I’m sure. You saw him, he’s almost catatonic. ”

“He’s been like that since your mom left? ” I nodded as I picked at my pasta. “And what about the diner? Are you still gonna work there over the summer? ”

“Well, I have to if I want money. My dad sure won’t give me any for anything. ”

“So you only work there for extra cash? ”

“Basically. School stuff. Clothes. What is it? ” I asked at his relieved expression.

“Nothing. That’ll just be one less thing to worry about later, ” he said cryptically.

“What do you mean? ”

He smiled and bumped my shoulder with his.

“Nothing. Try the pudding. My grandma won county prize three years in a row for it. ”

I allowed his subject change but put it away for future reference.

“So where are we going tonight? ” I asked as I tasted a bite of pudding and found that yes, it was delicious.

“Mugly’s. ”

“Mugly’s? ” I said thinking I’d heard him wrong.

“Yep. A little place in my town, if you don’t mind the drive. They have awesome homemade corn nuggets and barbeque. ”

“Mmm. I love barbeque, ” I crooned.

He laughed around his spoon of pudding at my enthusiasm.

“Well, I’ll file little tidbit away for later use. What else do you love? I’m making a list here. ”

It was my turn to laugh.

“Um. Popcorn. Cherries. Coffee. Anything pasta. My all time favorite, honey buns, I eat at least one everyday. ”

He smiled, leaning on his elbow watching me like he was thoroughly enjoying himself.

“What else? ”

“Concerts. ” He made a noise to indicate he did too. “Sci-Fi movies. The beach. The color blue. Convertibles. ”

“Really? Convertibles, huh? Well, then you’re in luck. ”

“Why? You drive a convertible? ”

“I do indeed. ”

It hadn’t slipped my mind the cute flirty banter that was flowing easily between us. That every time he smiled at me there were sparks in my veins. That I suddenly realized he was way out of my league and there is no way this guy would have given me the time of day had we not been imprinted.

But I remembered yesterday, when he walked me to Kyle’s, he did seem somewhat interested then. In fact, he seemed outright disappointed when Kyle was ready to go. Hmm.

Then I remember he can read my feelings and peeked at him. He was still watching and shaking his head in amusement. I wrinkled my nose and he laughed.

“You said there was a way to turn that off, right? ”

“Yep, ” he answered. “It takes practice and concentration. ”

“I’ll work on it. ”

“Hey, ” I heard from behind me. I turned to see Kyle. “You done? ”

“Uh, ” I looked down at my plate. I’d barely touched any of it. I’d spent most the time talking to Caleb. “Sure, I guess. What’s up? ”

“How you holding up? ”

“Good. Your family is really nice. ”

“I told you they would be. You didn’t have anything to worry about. So, since you’re feeling ok, what are you doing tonight? ”

I glanced at Caleb. He was watching Kyle with annoyance.

“Caleb and I are going to dinner. ”

He laughed humorlessly.

“Are you? Well at least he’s gonna try to date you. ”

“What is that supposed to mean? ” Caleb asked.

“It means this is some fluke. Some joke. She’s nothing like you, she already got rid of one jock in her life and now you think you can just take her out on a date, like everything was normal, and it’s all just gonna be hunky-dory from now on? ”

“Kyle. I don’t know what’s wrong with you. ” As Caleb spoke I looked around and saw that everyone was watching them with concern. “I’m sorry. I already said that. ”

“Oh yeah, you’re real sorry. Strutting around here, in my house, like you’re just king of everything, ” Kyle spat and I was shocked by the venom in his voice.

“Kyle. That’s not fair at all. I didn’t choose-”

“But you were still the chosen one weren’t you! ” he sneered.

“I can’t change that’s she my significant, no matter what you feel about her. This right here is a prime example why they have the no-dating rule. ”

“You hated that stupid rule just as much as me! ” he yelled and pointed angrily.

“I know but I didn’t break it, ” Caleb countered quietly. “If you’d spent less time trying to get her to go out with you, you wouldn’t feel this way about someone who doesn’t belong to you. ”

Kyle paled and then turned beet red.

“That has nothing to do with it, though if I had touched her first instead of you, things would be a little different not wouldn’t they? But she’s my friend. ”

“I disagree, ” Caleb said steadily.

Kyle’s hand shook with his drink in his grasp at his side. I wondered what was going on. I mean, I knew Kyle had a little crush on me but Caleb knew an awful lot about it. Then Kyle’s dad came forward and put his hand on Kyle’s shoulder.

“Son, ” he said softly. “I know this situation isn’t ideal but Caleb’s right on this. What are you doing? Don’t stir trouble where there doesn’t have to be any. ”

“I’m not. But, dad, you should have heard the things he used to say. He hated this whole thing. He wanted out. ”

“Kyle! ” Caleb yelled and stood up.

“He thought the whole significant thing was a joke. He said it was faked or something. He wanted to leave and go to school in Arizona. ”

“Kyle, shut up, man! That was before it happened to me, ok! It’s different now. And it’ll be different when it happens to you too. ”

“But it’s not gonna happen to me, is it? You’re the special one and I’ll be stuck alone forever. The one girl I thought I’d risk it for. ” He stuck one finger in to the air to drive home his point. “The one girl and you stole her right out from under me! Literally! ”

This was more uncomfortable than sex talk with Granny. I just wanted to crawl under the table. And the following silence after his statement was deafening. They were in front of me but I could slip behind Caleb to the house. Get a refill or something. So I did. But Maria caught me.

“Where are you going, Maggie? ”

I turned to look at them over my shoulder, completely embarrassed and uncomfortable. I started to walk again, shifting my gaze to the ground.

“Maggie. I’m sorry, ” Kyle blurted loudly while Kyle’s dad said, at the same time, “Let her go, Kyle. ” While Caleb said, “Maggie. ”

“Um. I think I’ll just go home but, thanks for lunch. I really enjoyed it. I want to change before tonight. ” I looked at Caleb. “I mean, if you still want to go. ”

“Of course I do. ” He sighed and came to stand in front of me. “I’m sorry about this, ” he mostly whispered.

“It’s ok. ” I needed to flee the eyes. “Can we talk, later? ”

“Do you want me to walk you? ”

“No, I’m fine. Really. ”

“Can you even leave? ” Kyle said condescendingly. “I mean it’s only day two. Last night you were on the edge the whole time. Go ahead. Try to just walk out of here without his help. ”

I already felt and knew it. That what he was saying was true. The minute I told Caleb no about walking me home, my body clenched with the knowledge that I’d leave him here.

“Shut up, Kyle! You claim to be her friend so stop it already. You think you’re helping right now? ”

Caleb took my arm gently and pulled me with him to the back gate. I looked back and saw Kyle and his father in a heated discussion. Gran, Rachel and Jen were looking at me with nothing but sympathy. They’d been through this. They knew what it was like. And I was already hurting.

“I’m so sorry, Maggie. I don’t know what’s gotten into him. ”

“It’s ok. ”

“No, it’s not. ” He spoke gently and my head started to hurt, the pounding behind my eyes suddenly almost unbearable. My eyes closed and pinched. He sighed and framed my face with his hands and I instantly felt better and opened my eyes to look up at him. “It’s so much worse when you’re upset. ”

“I’ll live. I just didn’t want to be in the middle of all... that, ya know? ”

“Yeah. Me neither, ” he said dryly. “Are you ok, now? ”

“Yeah. So, Arizona? Is that true? ” I asked still looking up at him.

“Yes. ” His thumbs moved across my cheeks causing my eyelids to flutter with pleasure. “And I never would have said a word to him if I’d known he’d tell everyone. This’ll stir up crap, for sure. ”

“So, ” I said thoughtfully. “We got Arizona and some sport you love to play that I have yet to learn what it is. What else? ”

“What? ”

“I’m making a list. ”

He laughed softly.

“I’ll give you the full list tonight, which I can’t wait for, by the way. ”

I nodded.

“Ok. I guess I’ll see you in a couple hours. ”

“I’ll pick you up at five thirty. ”

“In your convertible, ” I teased.

“Absolutely, ” he said grinning.

“Ok. ”

I wanted to move. I wanted to. He knew what I needed.

“I want you to go home and wait for me. It’ll be better this way, now you can see your dad for a little bit before we leave. Everything will be fine, ” he crooned soothingly. “And I’ll see you very soon. ”

“Ok. ”

I started to pull away but he pulled me closer and kissed my forehead. I looked up and smiled at him before pressing through the big wooden gate, not looking back at his multitude of family watching our every move.

Seven

I walked home slowly. I felt the pull to go back to Kyle’s house. It didn’t seem quite as bad since I understood what was happening this time.

Kyle only lived six blocks away. I paused at the red light and remembered the last time I was here, on the other side; watching a dark haired boy bob his head to his music. So normal, so human, I thought about how wrong I had been.

The light turned red and I looked before making my way across. As soon as I turned the corner I saw her breeze. Her scowl was firmly in place as I made my way down my walkway.

Rebecca.

“So. You’ve completely just cut me out. Is that it? ”

“What? No. Look, I know seeing me with Kyle last night looked bad. But we aren’t dating, far from it. I didn’t leave you out of the loop. I promise. ”

“It certainly looked like there was a loop. And that I was out of it. ”

“Nope. No loop. Nada. Kyle is just a friend. He was... helping me with something last night, that’s all. ”

“You know it’s been a week and half since I’ve even talked to you. You haven’t returned any of my text or voicemails. Even at the diner. ”

“Beck. I’m sorry. Ok? I’ve been having a hard time lately. I just didn’t want to drag you down with me. ”

She stood up off the steps and came to stand in front of me.

“Mags. You know better than that. I’m a glutton for drama and baggage. You know this, ” she joked but stepped forward a little and looked at me seriously. “You could have talked to me. ”

“I just didn’t want to talk about it. I don’t wanna think about. ”

“Look. You’re mom is a skeez for leaving but your dad has no right to treat you like this just because he’s angry or depressed or whatever. He needs to chill and take a Prozac. He’s still your dad. He still has responsibilities. ”

“I know but he apparently doesn’t, or doesn’t care. ”

“So you thought Kyle-class clown Kyle-could help you with your problems and not me? ”

She looked so hurt and bothered, I felt terrible. I have ignored her and purposely avoided her and there really was no good reason for it.

“I’m sorry. Really. ” I grabbed her purple nail polished hand and squeezed. “You’re right. I’ve been avoiding you. I’ve been avoiding everyone and everything. I completely screwed myself this year and I didn’t know what to do. I just didn’t want you to see me like that. I was almost as bad as my dad. ”

“That’s impossible. Your dad’s practically catatonic, ” she scoffed.

“That’s what I said. ” I grinned at her. “I love you, Becky Wecky. ”

“Ahh. You haven’t called me that since second grade. ” She smiled widely and it felt so good to see. I missed her. “I love you too, Maggie waggie. ”

She grabbed me in a hug and squeezed me. Then she grabbed my hand and started to tow me down to the sidewalk.

“Come on. You’re spending the night at my house. ”

I stopped her.

“I can’t. I have a... date. ”

She screwed up her lips.

“Kyle, again. ”

“No. Kyle’s cousin, Caleb. ”

“Wow. ” She grinned deviously. “You’re really making the rounds, aren’t you? ”

“Shut up! ” I yelled playfully. “I’m not dating Kyle. ”

“So, Caleb is Kyle’s cousin. Where did you meet him? ”

“At the main street red light. He stepped into traffic and I pulled him back. ”

“What! For reals? ” she shrieked.

“Yeah. ”

I realized with painful acceptance that that was about all I could tell her. Everything else was complicated and crazy and unbelievable. I was going to have to keep secrets from her. Mmmmm. That sucked.

“Wow. So you saved him and now you’re going on a date? When did this happen? ”

“Last night. ”

“Ahh. He’s smitten because you saved him and asked you out to thank you. How cute. ”

I felt a sudden bristle at her nonchalant words.

“It’s a little more than that. ”

“What do you mean? ”

I sighed and relented. There was no point.

“Nothing. ”

“So, how old is he? ”

“Nineteen. He’s a sophomore at U of T. ”

“Really? Football? ”

“Not sure. But he’s studying to be an architect. ”

“Oooh. A money maker. Sweet. ” She sighed dreamily. “I bet he drives a Lexus. ”

“Don’t know. But it’s a convertible. ”

“Definite Lexus. Is he hot? ”

“He’s perfect, ” I answered quickly, my mouth answered without my permission.

I blushed and she laughed.

“Aha! Wow. You really like him, huh? So, what time is Caleb coming to pick you up? ”

My heart clenched each time she said his name. I tried to focus on her face and remain calm. My fingers were starting to twitch.

“Five thirty. ”

“What? ” she exclaimed loudly and grabbed my arm. “That’s only two hours. We gotta get you ready! ”
“What? Why? What’s wrong with what I have on? ”

“Nothing. But this is a college guy, babe. ” She pulled me as she walked backwards. “They expect a certain kind of girl. And no offense, but your age isn’t exactly going for you right now. Unless he’s a pedophile. Do you think-”

“Beck! Eew! Stop! ”

“Anyway, he’s been at college for a year already, seeing all those mature girls with their expensive cars and flat ironed fake blonde hair. It’s a lot to compete with. ”

“I’m not gonna worry about that. ”

I wanted to contradict her. Tell her I was his soul mate. That he would like me even if I wore a sack. I knew this must be true because I could picture Caleb in one and I still wanted him. I giggled to myself at the picture but then I remembered what he wore today. His yellow shirt and how much I liked looking at it on him. I suddenly wanted to look my best. Not just ok. Not just presentable. I wanted him to look at me and think I was pretty.

That brought me back to this morning in my bathroom when he thought I looked gorgeous in blue, how he loved my freckles. And how even after all that I still felt young and inadequate.

I wanted him to want me because he wants me. Not because he’s imprinted with me and can’t help himself. So I smiled at Beck and told her to have her way with me.

“Really! ” she squealed and she shut my bedroom door. “You never let me play doll with you! ”

“I know. Now’s your chance. Don’t go overboard, ” I warned.

“Ok. What are we going for here? Where’s he taking you? ”

“A barbeque joint in his home town. ”

“Boo. That gives me nothing to work with. ” She pressed a finger to her lips as she thought. “What do you want? ”

“I just want him to look at me and think there’s no one else he’d rather be with. ”

She smiled.

“So. Sex vixen? ”

I gasped.

“Rebecca! ”

“Kidding! Kidding. I have the perfect thing in mind. Don’t worry about a thing, Mags. We’ll have him drooling, in a very tame and respectable way, of course. ”

I rolled my eyes but smiled at how much I missed her. I took a deep breath and let her work.

An hour and forty seven minutes later I stood in front of the oval floor mirror in my room. My very me room that I completely redid when my mom left. She had it all coordinated with different squares of color. I always hated it. So when she left I took everything down and now it’s just a room. The walls are white; the bed is white and green with a dark brown poster frame. Not a very girly room but I loved it, because it was all me.

So, I stood looking at what Beck had done. I didn’t look like a different person. I didn’t look vamped up with a crazy outfit or makeup. I wasn’t glamazonned in a preppy, peppy outfit that wasn’t me. I was just me.

She’d made me shower while she looked through my closet and decided nothing would do. So, she took a dark green knee length dress out that had thin brown stripes down the length of it. She cut the sleeves off to make it a tank dress and pulled a wide brown ribbon off a pillow on my bed to push my hair back with like a headband. She was always so crafty, always coming up with crazy things to do. It’s like her brain never turned off.

She pulled her long gold chain necklace off, with an open heart at the end that hung half way to my navel and put it around my neck.

“Perfect. Now shoes. Aha. ”

She handed me my strappy gold flat sandals and I pulled them on before she dragged me back to the bathroom. My hair has a natural curl at the ends, always has, but she wanted them to curl her way. So she curled and did my makeup and then painted my nails a barely there pale pink. She ended the ensemble with small gold studs in my ears and smiled at my reflection with approval.

And that’s where we are. And I’d never been this nervous in my life. What if he thought I was overdoing it, trying too hard? I pushed that thought away. That had to be some side effect of the withdrawals from him because I’d never acted like this before. I wrung my hands and smoothed my dress over and over.

“Why are you so nervous? You’re going to sweat through your dress if you don’t calm down. ”

“I’m ok. ”

“What’s wrong with you? I don’t remember you being this way before. Even with Chad. It’s just a date, ” she reasoned.

Yeah right.

I shook my head to clear it and thanked her for helping me right as the door bell sounded. It took all my strength to stay put and not bound down the stairs for him. The ache in my stomach and back had returned already but not as bad as before and I wondered if he was feeling it too.

“Wow. College boy is four minutes early. He must be trying to impress, ” she joked. “Sorry. I meant to be out of here before he came. ”

“It’s ok. ” I thought real hard before my next statement and decided it was ok. “I want you to meet him. ”

“Really? It’s not weird I’m meeting some guy you barely know on your first date? ”

“No. ” I chuckled as I pushed my bangs over to cover the wound on my forehead. “I’m sure he’ll be fine with it. ”

I rushed to answer the door, at a ladylike pace, but dad beat me to it. Caleb was trying to make small talk with the man known as my father, standing in the same outfit as yesterday just another color, thankfully, but still his boxers nonetheless.

Caleb was wearing something different than earlier; a button up blue and green shirt and brown boots with his jeans. He looked up at me coming down the stairs to greet them and his face lit up and he couldn’t stop himself anymore than I could. It was like a dam broke.

He reached for me just as I raced to the bottom step and embraced me. I wrapped my arms around his neck, lifting my feet from the floor. I breathed him in and everything else fell away. He was just as happy to see me as I was him, as strange as it all was. And once again, the second he touched me the ache of being away and silly girl worry over what he’d think melted away.

I somehow found my sanity and pulled back. He smiled shyly and put some space between us. He looked me over, making my cheeks beg for permission to scarlet but I forbid them to, standing my ground.

“You look gorgeous, in case you didn’t know. ”

“Thanks. You too. ”

“Wow, ” I heard Beck mutter behind me.

I turned and beckoned her down the stairs.

“This is my best friend, Rebecca. Beck, this is Caleb. ”

“Hi, ” he said easily and reached for her hand.

For a split second I imagined the whole imprinting process again but with her and Caleb instead. She already seemed half in love from her glazy stare.

“Hey, there. ” She grabbed his hand and removed it quickly. “Do you have any single brothers? ”

He laughed.

“Beck! ” I chastised.

“I’m just saying, ” she rationalized. “Alright. Have fun. I’m out. Text me if you need me. ” She leaned to whisper in my ear. “Do you remember the code for a 911 emergency date exit? ”

She pulled back to look at me seriously.

“Uh, 911? ”

“Good girl. ” She smiled at me and then at Caleb. “Have fun you two! ” She waved over her shoulder.

I turned back to Caleb who stood amused and patiently waiting. I completely forgot my father standing there by the door. I looked at him and saw how he was looking at me, as if he was actually seeing me. Like he was looking at me for the first time in ten months, which was true. I didn’t know if that was a good thing, or bad.

“Where are you taking her? ”
“To a place called, Mugly’s. It’s a barbeque place my family loves to go to, ” Caleb answered.

“Hmm. Well, I expect her back before midnight. ” He turned to me and scowled. “I know you think because you graduated you’re all grown up but you still live with me, so my rules. ”

“Dad. I didn’t say anything. Midnight is fine. It’s only five thirty. We’re just going to dinner, ” I said at a complete loss for his outburst and his sudden concern for my whereabouts.

“Well, good. ” He seemed off put, like he expected a fight. “You have your cell? ”

“Yes. ” I grabbed it off the hall table and put it in my bag. “All set. ”

“Ok. Call me if you need anything. ” All I could do was stare at him like he was speaking Chinese. So he sighed harshly. “What? ”

“No offense, dad. But since when do you care if I have my cell or not? Since when do you care what time I come home? ” I asked softly.

“Since you started bringing a boy home that’s too old for you. ”

“He’s only two years older than me, dad. And I’ll be eighteen soon. ”

I glanced back at Caleb and he smiled, letting me know he’d wait.

“Well, ” dad mumbled. That seemed to bluster his resolve. “Still, with Chad it was safe. I knew he was leaving for college. I knew there would be no chance of you getting all silly over him because he’d keep you at arms length. Everyone always knew he was leaving, everyone but you. But this boy, he is not safe. ” He looked over at Caleb. “She is still a minor and I’m not thrilled about you taking her out. ”

“I understand, sir. I promise you I’m not up to any trouble, ” Caleb answered respectfully.

“Dad, if I’m old enough to work almost full time and go to school in clothes that I paid for all by myself, I think old enough to go on a date and know to be careful and come home at a reasonable hour. ”

His face went pale and he nodded sadly.

“I guess you’re right. We’ll talk later. ”

He walked off into the kitchen and I saw the light turn out as he made his way through the house. I was astounded. What just happened?

I looked at Caleb and felt the need to explain. I’d told him earlier that my dad was docile and uncaring but now he was all about my every move.

“I understand, ” Caleb said. “I feel how confused you are. It’s fine. Maybe he’s just waking up. I told you it probably wouldn’t last forever. ”

“Yeah. But why now? Why when I’m gonna need-” I stopped myself from saying anything else.

“I know. I need you too. ” He came and hugged me to him, making sure to touch his palm to my arm so as to get skin contact, to take my troubles away. “Don’t worry. We’ll figure it out. In the mean time are ready to go? ”