Coming Soon Follow the continuing story of Gabriel and Julia in the highly anticipated sequel to Gabriel’s Inferno, coming soon from Omnific Publishing. Prologue 15 страница

Chapter 20

Julia treated Paul to a coffee that she paid for surreptitiously with a Starbucks gift card—a card that had a picture of a light bulb on it. When they eventually crossed the threshold of Segovia, they were met by a very pleasant-looking Spaniard who identified himself as the owner. Much to his delight, Paul responded in Spanish. Segovia’s interior featured sunny yellow walls on which were painted images from Picasso’s drawing of Don Quixote and Sancho Panza. A classical guitarist sat in a corner playing arrangements by Maestro Segovia. And nearby, a series of long tables had been placed in a square in the very center of the room, marking the reserved space for the faculty dinner. Its geometric configuration made it inevitable that all guests would sit facing one another. Julia did not relish the idea of facing Professor Pain, and if she thought she could have escaped without insulting or drawing undue attention from Professor Martin, she would have. Paul chose seats on one of the far corners of the table; for once again, he was conscious of the class system and knew that his place was not one of honor. While he discussed the menu with the waiter en Españ ol, Julia silently mused about Gabriel’s jealousy and stealthily turned on her cell phone so that she could text him. But there was a text already waiting for her: Don’t come to dinner.
Give Paul an excuse.
Wait for me at my place;
the concierge will admit you.
I’ll explain later.
Please do as I ask. —G Julia staring at the screen blankly until Paul nudged her. “Would you like a drink? ” “Um, it’s probably out of season for sangria, but I’d love some if they have it. ” “Our sangria is excellent, ” said the waiter before leaving to place their drink orders with the bartender. Julia gave Paul an apologetic look. “I have a text from Owen. I’m sorry to be rude. ” “No worries, ” said Paul, busying himself with the menu while she quickly prepared a reply: My phone was off.
It’s too late, I’m already here.
You have nothing to be
jealous of—I’m going home with you.
You’ll have me
in your bed until morning. —J She deposited her phone in her messenger bag, praying silently that Gabriel would not be too cross. Oh gods of all over-protective and jealous (fill in appropriate description of Gabriel and our relationship here), please don’t let him make a scene. Not in front of his colleagues. Unfortunately for Julia and whoever was texting her, the messenger bag muffled the sound of an incoming message, which arrived shortly thereafter. Within twenty minutes, the rest of the guests filtered in. Professor Leaming and some of the other professors were seated beside Paul. On the far end, Gabriel was sandwiched in between Professors Martin and Singer. At the sight of Gabriel and his seatmates, Julia began sipping her sangria a little too eagerly, hoping she’d be able to get a refill to alleviate the tension that crackled in the air. The sangria was delicious and packed with lots of citrus fruit, which pleased her greatly. “Are you cold? ” Paul gestured to the purple pashmina that was wound around her neck in a very chic manner. “Not really. ” She slowly removed the scarf and placed it on top of her bag. Paul politely averted his eyes as the delicate pale flesh of Julia’s neck and dé colletage became visible. She was beautiful, and her body, although small, was blessed with generous breasts that provided her with very handsome, proportional cleavage. As soon as she removed her pashmina, a pair of jealous blue eyes darted across the table, hungrily taking in her newly exposed skin before making a hasty retreat. “Paul, what’s up with Professor Singer? ” Julia kept her voice low behind her wine glass. He saw Singer sitting far too close to Emerson, and he watched as Emerson subtly moved his chair away from her. She moved her chair closer in response. But Julia missed the exchange. “She and Emerson had an affair. Looks like they’re back at it. ” Paul snickered. “I guess we discovered the reason for his good mood this week. ” Julia’s eyes widened, and she felt ill. “So she was his—girlfriend? ” Paul moved his chair closer so that Professor Leaming couldn’t overhear their conversation. Of course, the fact that a flamenco dancer had appeared and was now dancing to the loud strains of a classical guitar made his task much easier. “Just a minute. ” He passed a tapas plate to Julia. “Try these. It’s chorizo and Manchego cheese, and crostini with Cabrales, a Spanish blue cheese. ” She helped herself, nibbling on the appetizers while she waited anxiously for an answer. “Singer doesn’t have boyfriends. She’s into pain. And control. You know…” His voice trailed off suggestively. Julia blinked in disbelief. “Did you ever see Pulp Fiction? ” he asked. She shook her head. “I don’t like Quentin Tarantino. He’s too dark. ” “Then let’s just say that she likes to get medieval…in her personal life…on people’s asses. And she isn’t shy about letting people know it. She researches that stuff and posts her publications online. ” Julia swallowed a piece of chorizo quickly. “So that means that he—” “Is a sick fucker like she is. But he’s a hell of a researcher, as you saw this afternoon. I try not to think about what goes on in his personal life. I think that lovers should be gentle with one another. Not that love enters into what they’re doing. ” Paul surveyed the room cautiously before whispering in Julia’s ear. “I think if you care enough about someone to have sex with them, then you should care enough to respect them and not treat them as an object. You should be responsible and careful and never, ever hurt them. Even if they’re fucked up enough to beg you to. ” Julia shivered and took a very large sip of her second sangria. He leaned back in his chair. “I can’t relate to someone wanting pain at all, let alone during sex. Sex is supposed to be about pleasure and affection. Do you think Dante would have tied Beatrice up and worked her over with a whip? ” Julia hesitated, then shook her head. “When I was an undergraduate at St. Mike’s, I took a course on the Philosophy of Sex, Love, and Friendship. We talked about consent. You know how everyone says that as long as an activity is between two consenting adults, it’s okay? Our professor asked us if we thought a human being could consent to an injustice, such as selling himself into slavery. ” “No one wants to be a slave. ” “They do in Professor Pain’s world. Some people sell themselves into sexual slavery—voluntarily. So is slavery okay if the slave wants to be a slave? Can someone who is in their right mind consent to slavery, or are they simply irrational because they want to be a slave? ” Julia began to feel more than slightly uncomfortable having this particular conversation so close to Professor Pain and Gabriel, so she tipped back the last of her sangria and swiftly changed the subject. “What’s your dissertation topic, Paul? I don’t think you ever told me. ” He chuckled. “Pleasure and the beatific vision. It’s a comparison between the deadly sins associated with pleasure—lust, gluttony, and greed—and the pleasure of the beatific vision in Paradise. Emerson is a great dissertation advisor, but like I said, I stay out of his personal life. Even though he’d probably be a hell of a case study for the Second Circle of the Inferno. ” “I can’t understand why everyone just doesn’t want kindness, ” Julia mused, more to herself than to Paul. “Life is painful enough. ” “That’s the world we live in. ” He offered her a sincere smile. “I hope your boyfriend is kind to you. Just be grateful you found someone who isn’t into the sick shit. ” At that moment they were interrupted by the waiter, so Paul didn’t see the color drain out of Julia’s cheeks and lips. She involuntarily peeked over at Gabriel and saw Singer whispering in his ear again. Gabriel’s eyes remained stubbornly fixed on the table in front of him, teeth clenched and jaw set. He picked up his glass of wine, sipped it, and set it down again, all while Julia stared. Look at me, Gabriel. Roll your eyes, rub your face, scowl…something, anything. Show me this is all a misunderstanding. Show me Paul is wrong. “Julia? ” Paul’s voice interrupted her thoughts. “Do you want to share the paella Valenciana with me? They only make it for two. It’s very good. ” Now he noticed Julia’s paleness and the fact that her fingers were trembling. “Hey, are you okay? ” She rubbed her forehead. “Yeah. The paella is fine. ” “Maybe you should go easy on the sangria. You haven’t had much to eat, and you’re starting to look sick. ” He was worried that he’d shocked her with his salacious revelations, revelations that he had no right to offer to a fellow graduate student. So he changed the subject by telling her stories of his last trip to Spain and his fascination with Gaudi’s architecture. She nodded as if on cue and even asked questions from time to time, but her mind was far away, trying to sort out who exactly she’d shared a bed with a week ago—the fallen angel who still had goodness in him or someone much, much darker. She noticed that Professor Singer’s left hand was suddenly hidden from view. She couldn’t bring herself to meet Gabriel’s eyes. But that didn’t stop Professor Singer from noticing Julia. Their eyes met just as Gabriel appeared to push her hand away under the table. Embarrassed, Julia turned to Paul, while Singer wore a look of inquisitive amusement that slowly morphed into an unblinking, fascinated stare. Eager to escape the sordid spectacle she thought she’d witnessed, Julia made a feeble excuse to Paul about not feeling well and left the table. She climbed the staircase to the second floor and quickly located the restroom. Examining her features in the mirror, she tried to process what he’d told her. Her thoughts were a sordid jumble of words and dark images, while her heart bled. Why would anyone want to be hit? Gabriel and Ann…pain…control…Ann’s fingers in Gabriel’s lap…Ann hitting Gabriel…Gabriel hitting Ann. Julia found herself leaning against the counter as she fought a wave of nausea. She wasn’t sure how long she stood there, eyes closed, before someone pushed through the door. “Hello there. ” Professor Singer smiled widely, showing rows of shiny teeth. Julia marveled at how the light glinting off the professor’s glasses tricked the brain into thinking that her green eyes were glowing red. “I’m Professor Singer. It’s a pleasure to meet you. ” She extended her hand, and Julia took it reluctantly, mumbling a response. The professor’s hand was cold but far from lifeless. She gripped Julia firmly and for far too long. When she released her, she trailed a finger down Julia’s lifeline as if she were intentionally measuring her. The act made Julia shiver. Ann cocked her head to one side and narrowed her eyes. “I thought you were expecting me. Do I make you nervous? ” Julia frowned. “No, I came up here to wash my hands. I think I’m getting the flu. ” “That’s a pity. ” The professor smiled more widely and took a step closer. “You seem healthy enough. You have lovely skin. ” “Thank you. ” Julia’s eyes darted toward the door, eager to make an escape. “Not at all. Not at all. Are you wearing lipstick, or is that the natural shade of your lips? ” She leaned forward at the waist and peered far too closely at Julia’s ripe, open mouth, their faces mere inches from one another. Julia took a step backward. “Um, it’s my natural color. ” Ann took another step forward. “Extraordinary. You know, of course, that the natural shade of the lip is repeated across a woman’s body in more intimate places. Your color is so pleasing on your mouth. I’m sure it’s breathtaking elsewhere. ” Julia’s jaw dropped open. “Look at yourself in the mirror. How could I not have noticed you downstairs? And fortunately, you noticed me too. ” Ann took another step forward and dropped her voice. “Do you like to watch? ” she whispered. “Did you like watching what I was doing to him under the table? ” Julia reddened. “I don’t know what you’re talking about. ” “Flesh changes color, you know, in response to increased blood flow. Like now. ” She smiled, exposing her teeth. “I’ve embarrassed or aroused you, so your cheeks have grown flushed and so have your lips. But you’re flushed elsewhere, aren’t you? ” She dropped her voice still further. “And lower down, I’m sure you’re begging to be stroked and teased…” She licked her lips and smiled. “My little pink pearl. I think you want me to tease you. You’d make such a pretty pet. ” Julia stared defiantly. “I’m not interested in being anyone’s pet. ” That made Professor Singer back up. Julia’s sudden show of spirit was wholly unexpected. “I’m a human being, not an animal. Leave me alone. ” Julia did not know where in holy hell she found the nerve to dispute with Professor Singer, but she found it. Ann laughed. “Human beings are animals, my dear. We share the same physiology, the same reactions to stimuli, the same needs for food, drink, and sex. Some of us are just more intelligent. ” Julia glared down at her. “I’m intelligent enough to know what an animal is. And I am not interested in being fucked like one. Excuse me. ” She sidestepped the professor quickly, heading for the door. “If you change your mind, come and find me, ” Ann purred. “Not a chance in hell, ” spat Julia. She fled, inhaling and exhaling very quickly as she began to jog down the hall. A quick pair of footsteps followed close behind. She let out a shriek as someone pulled her into a darkened room, closing and locking the door behind them. She pushed against a hard chest roughly before someone grabbed her wrists. “Julianne. ” It was too dark to see his face, but she recognized his voice and the strange sensation that hummed up and down her arms in reaction to his touch. She stopped struggling. “Please turn on the light. I—I’m claustrophobic. ” Her voice sounded to Gabriel’s ears like that of a frightened child. He released her and pulled out his iPhone, holding it up like a lamp. “Is this better? ” Gabriel suppressed the urge to ask what light had to do with claustrophobia as he wrapped an arm around her trembling shoulders and pressed his lips to her forehead. “Julianne? ” She took a moment to examine their surroundings and realized that they were in a broom closet. “Julianne? ” he repeated, trying to capture her attention. “I saw Ann follow you. Are you all right? ” “No. ” “What did she do? ” “She said I’d make a good pet, ” Julia whispered, her eyes downcast. Gabriel scowled darkly. “Did she touch you? ” She closed her eyes and wiped a few beads of sweat from her forehead. “Just my hand. ” He quickly dimmed the light on his phone so that they were only partially illuminated, for he was worried that Ann might see the light under the door. “This is what I was afraid might happen. Why didn’t you do as I asked? ” “I told you, I didn’t get your text until it was too late. I didn’t expect to be hit on at a faculty dinner, by a professor who wasn’t you. ” Gabriel growled. “She was watching you across the table and was probably excited by your shyness, not to mention your beauty. Having you in the same room as her is the equivalent of dangling a lamb in front of a wolf. ” He shook his head and cursed. “I tried to keep you away from her. ” Julia searched his eyes. “You weren’t keeping me away because you’re jealous? ” Gabriel let out a sharp exhalation. “Of course I’m jealous. Jealousy is a new emotion for me, Julianne. I’m not practiced in the art of dealing with it. But I would have begged Paul to take you to dinner somewhere, anywhere, just to keep you away from her. ” “Were you involved with Professor Singer? ” His expression darkened, and he pressed his lips into a thin line. “This is not the place to discuss that. ” Julia shook her head as her nausea returned. She’d hoped that Paul was mistaken. But Gabriel’s reaction told her otherwise. “How could you? ” “You’re shaking. Are you going to be sick? ” “Why won’t you answer my question? ” Gabriel spoke through his teeth. “Julianne, your comfort and well-being is my only concern at this moment. I won’t answer any questions until I am satisfied that you are all right. Although if you throw up, I promise to hold your hair. ” He smirked slightly. “I’m not going to throw up, ” she murmured. “Unfortunately, she’s not the first woman to come on to me. I’m more upset about the fact that you’re hiding something. ” Gabriel’s eyebrows furrowed at her admission, but he quickly pushed his concern aside. “Julianne, trust me when I tell you that you do not want to know more about her. Your mind should remain unpolluted. ” “But it’s okay for her to molest you under the table? That’s how she noticed me, Gabriel. She caught me staring. ” A muscle jumped in his jaw, and Julia saw sparks in his eyes. “She’s goading me. And for obvious reasons, I can’t react and cause a scene. I was hoping she’d ignore you and focus all of her twisted attention on me. Clearly, I was wrong. ” “Why did I have to find out from Paul that you were involved with her? ” “Paul said that? ” She nodded. Gabriel swore an oath and began rubbing his eyes forcefully, as if he were blotting out a repulsive image. “I didn’t expect her to attend my lecture. We don’t share the same values or research interests. Today is the first time I’ve seen her in months. She’s part of my past—a past I will not repeat. Not if I live forever. ” “Paul said she likes pain. Were you—violent together? ” He clenched his fists at his sides, the tendons in his arms humming in contraction. “Yes. I’d like to tell you that she was the wicked temptress and I was lured into an entanglement with her, but that isn’t what happened. Nevertheless, I am not going to explain the dark contours of her world to you. Not even a single thought of yours belongs there. But I’ll tell you that during one of my—encounters with her, she did something that caused me to lose my temper. And I gave her a taste of her own medicine. That act alone terminated our interactions, and I was immediately flung out of her house. ” “She hit you? ” “More than once, ” rasped Gabriel grimly. “That was the point. ” “Gabriel. ” His name came out as something akin to a sob, and his heart was instantly pierced. “How could you? How could you let her touch you, let alone hurt you? ” He encircled her with his arms and squeezed her tightly. “Julianne, you do not want to hear this. Please forget what Paul said. Forget all about her. ” “I can’t. I can’t forget what you said in your lecture this afternoon. Your description of the act of making love was really beautiful, but that’s not what you want. Or maybe you think it’s impossible for lovers to be like that. ” Gabriel’s eyes bored into hers. “Of course it’s what I want. Of course I think it’s possible. I’ve just never experienced it. ” He cleared his throat. “You aren’t the only virgin in this relationship. ” She looked at him in surprise. “Then why would you want someone to hurt you? Haven’t you been hurt enough? ” His face wore a pained expression. “Gabriel, your life is like a series of locked, secret rooms. I have no idea what lurks behind those doors. And you won’t tell me. I have to find out about your ex-girlfriend from your research assistant! ” “She was never my girlfriend. And I asked you about Simon, and you wouldn’t tell me anything. So far we are even. ” Julia winced. “I told you about my mother. ” Gabriel sighed. “Yes, you did. And hearing what happened to you in St. Louis hurt me far more than I can say. More than Ann and her parlor tricks. ” He shook his head. “You’re right. I should have told you about her. ” He shifted his weight from one foot to the other, and Julia heard his fists slide into the pockets of his trousers. “I thought that when I told you, you’d be so repulsed that you’d run. You’d realize I truly am a devil. ” “You’re no devil. You’re a fallen angel who still has goodness left in him. A fallen angel who aspires to make love with a woman and treat her with tenderness, ” whispered Julia. She closed her eyes. “Hearing about Professor Singer from you would have been far better than finding out like this. Or having it flaunted in front of me when you wouldn’t even look in my direction. ” “I wear tremendous shame, Julianne, which is something you know precious little about. ” “You aren’t the only sinner in this closet, Gabriel. ” She opened her eyes and inhaled slowly. “Which is why I can’t hold your past sins against you. Do you still want her? ” “Of course not! ” His demeanor immediately shifted to outrage. “We did not have a relationship, Julianne—we had a couple of encounters. It was over a year ago, and I haven’t been involved with her since. ” He sighed deeply. “If you insist, I’ll tell you more, but I can’t do it now. Can you give me until after dinner to explain? Please? ” She chewed her lip pensively. Gabriel gently pressed his mouth to hers, tugging her lip free with his own and slowly releasing her. “Please don’t hurt yourself. It upsets me. ” “I could say the same to you. ” His shoulders slumped forward, and he groaned a little. “I will give you until after dinner only if you promise not to let her touch you. ” “Gladly. ” Julia exhaled deeply. “Thank you. ” “So you’ll stay? ” She shook her head. “I can’t sit across the table from her and eat paella. She makes me sick. ” “I’ll take you home. ” “You’re the guest of honor. You can’t leave. ” Gabriel ran his fingers through his hair as he thought for a moment. “At least let me call a taxi for you. I’ll try to extricate myself as soon as possible. My concierge will let you in. ” He reached into his pocket and pulled out a money clip. She waved his hand aside. “I have my own money. ” “Let me give you my credit card so you can order dinner and have it delivered. ” “I can’t eat. ” He sighed and rubbed at his eyes. She turned to leave, but Gabriel reached out and grasped her elbow. “Wait. ” He stared down at her, his voice pleading. “When I saw you walk into the lecture hall, my heart leaped. My heart leaped, Julianne. You’ve never looked more beautiful. You looked…happy. ” He swallowed noisily. “I’m sorry I killed that look. I’m sorry I didn’t tell you the truth. Do you think…you might be able to forgive me? ” “You didn’t sin against me, Gabriel. ” Her eyes slowly began to fill with tears. “I’m trying to figure out how deeply rooted your taste for pain is and what that means for us. I feel like I have no idea who you really are, and that hurts. ” With that, she exited the closet.
***
The Fates favored Julia on her return to the dinner party. While she fetched her things and made her excuses, Ann was still ensconced in the ladies’ room. A second female professor was missing from the table. One look at Julia’s pale face and teary eyes convinced Paul not to try to persuade her to stay. And when she offered an obviously fictitious explanation about having a migraine, he didn’t question her until they were standing outside the restaurant. “Singer followed you to the bathroom, didn’t she? ” Julia chewed on her lip and nodded. He shook his head. “She’s a predator. A dangerous predator. I should have warned you. Are you okay? ” “I’m fine. But I have to go home. I’m sorry about the paella. ” “Fuck the paella. All I care about is you. ” He winced slightly. “If you want to file a complaint against her, I’ll take you to the judicial committee’s office on Monday. ” “What’s that? ” “It’s the office that handles allegations of misconduct against faculty and staff. If you want to tell the judicial committee what happened with Singer, I’ll help you. ” Julia shook her head. “There weren’t any witnesses. It would be my word against hers. I’m going to try to forget what happened, unless she approaches me again. ” “It’s your decision, but you should know that I filed a complaint against her last year. Even though it was her word against mine, my harassment complaint is still in her file. She stays away from me now. It was the best decision I ever made. ” Her smiled faded. “I don’t think I want to do that, but I’ll consider it. And I’m sorry that happened to you. ” “Don’t worry about me. Have a nice weekend and try to forget about this. If you need to talk, you’ve got my number. I’ll see you next week. ” Paul offered an encouraging look and waved as the taxi pulled away. While Virgil’s words rang in Julia’s ears, she checked her cell phone. She found a text message that had been sent shortly before the professors arrived at Segovia: Stay away from Prof. Singer.
Stay close to Paul—she despises him.
Be careful. —G Too little, too late, Julia thought ruefully. When she entered Gabriel’s apartment she quickly turned on the fireplace, hoping to dispel the darkness that she felt creeping around her heart. But it didn’t seem to help. Truly, all she wanted to do was go home and pull the bed covers over her head. But she knew better than to hide from reality now. She didn’t want to snoop, but she found herself in Gabriel’s bedroom, kneeling on the floor of his closet. She was searching for his black-and-white photographs, wondering if Professor Singer was in one of them. She certainly had the correct hair color. But the pictures were gone. She examined every inch of his closet and looked around his bedroom and even under his bed. The photos had been removed. Hanging on the wall in their stead were six pieces of art, some abstract, some renaissance, one by Tom Thomson, but all beautiful and strangely…peaceful. Gabriel had redecorated. She stood in front of his dresser admiring the reproduction of Botticelli’s Primavera that was displayed over it when her gaze alighted on an eight by ten picture in a dark frame. It was of a man and a woman dancing. The man was tall, attractive, elegant, and commanding, and he was looking down at the woman with an intense, almost heated gaze. The woman was petite, blushing and staring at the buttons of his shirt. She was wearing a purple dress that was so vibrant it seemed to diminish all the other colors in the picture. How did he get a photo of the two of us dancing at Lobby? Rachel, she thought. Julia quickly placed the picture back and exited the bedroom, being sure to leave everything exactly as she found it.

Chapter 21

While Julia waited at his apartment, Gabriel played the chameleon, blending into his environment. He was charming and gracious to his colleagues, but all the while, his insides churned and his mind raced. He had to force himself to eat and to decline libation upon libation. Gabriel was convinced that he would be returning to an empty apartment. Julianne was going to run. It wasn’t surprising—he knew it would happen eventually. He just hadn’t thought it would be this secret that would separate them. He was unworthy of her for many reasons, reasons he’d hid like a coward. It wasn’t a question of love, for Gabriel did not believe that she could ever love him. He was unlovable. Nonetheless, he’d hoped to be able to court her long enough for their affection and friendship to bind them together, even in the face of some of his darkness. Now it was too late. When he finally arrived home, he was surprised to find her asleep on the sofa, her face a picture of perfect peace. He tried valiantly to be still, to resist the urge to touch, but he couldn’t. He reached out and softly stroked her long, silken hair, murmuring sad Italian words. He needed music. At that moment, he felt the need for melody and lyric to soothe his agony. But the only song he could think of that would match this moment was Gary Jules’ cover of Mad World. And Gabriel didn’t want to be listening to that song when Julianne left him. Suddenly, her eyes fluttered open. She saw that Gabriel was no longer wearing his suit jacket and tie and had released the top three buttons of his shirt. He’d also removed his cufflinks and rolled up his sleeves. He smiled but his expression was cautious. “I didn’t mean to wake you. ” “It’s fine. I just dozed off. ” She yawned and sat up slowly. “You can go back to sleep. ” “I don’t think that’s a good idea. ” “Did you eat something? ” She shook her head. “Will you eat something now? I could make you an omelet. ” “My stomach is in knots. ” He was irritated but refused to argue, for he knew a much bigger argument was on the horizon. “I have a present for you. ” “Gabriel, a present is the last thing I need right now. ” “I disagree. But it can wait. ” He shifted uncomfortably on the sofa, never taking his eyes off of her. “You’re wearing a scarf and sitting by a roaring fire, yet you’re so pale. Are you cold? ” “No. ” Julia reached up to remove her pashmina, but Gabriel’s long, slender fingers caught her hand. “May I? ” She withdrew her hand and nodded warily. Gabriel moved closer, and Julia shut her eyes as his scent washed over her. He gently unwound the scarf from her neck with both hands and placed it on the sofa between them. Then he reached out to trail the knuckles of one hand down the column of her throat. “You are so lovely, ” he murmured. “No wonder all eyes were on you this evening. ” She tensed at his words, and he pulled back, stifling a groan. Her eyes found her feet, and she realized that she’d been so distracted she hadn’t bothered to remove her boots. But he hadn’t complained. “I’m sorry for putting my boots on your couch. I’ll take them off. ” She fingered one of the zippers, but Gabriel moved quickly to kneel on the carpet. “What are you doing? ” Her eyes widened in confusion. “I’ve been admiring your boots. Very much. ” He lightly grazed her high heels with his hands. “Rachel helped me choose them. She has great taste, but the heels are always too high. ” He regarded her seductively. “Your heels could never be too high. But let me free you. ” At the sound of his voice, husky and adoring, Julia’s heart skipped a beat. His hands hovered over her knees, where the tops of the zippers rested. “May I? ” She acquiesced and held her breath. Reverently, he unzipped her boot and gently ran his fingers down her calf to her ankle, freeing her. He repeated this procedure on the other leg, placing the boots next to the sofa. Then he lifted her right foot and began to massage it lightly with both hands. Julia moaned in spite of herself and bit her lip sharply in embarrassment. “It’s all right to voice your pleasure, Julianne, ” he encouraged. “It reassures me that I don’t repulse you completely. ” “You don’t repulse me. But I don’t like seeing you on your knees, ” she whispered. His pleased expression faded. “When a man kneels before a woman, it’s a gesture of chivalry. When a woman kneels before a man, it’s unseemly. ” Julia moaned once again involuntarily. “How did you learn to do this? ” He gave her a puzzled look. “How did you learn to massage feet? ” she clarified, flushing more deeply. He sighed. “A friend. ” Probably a black-and-white photograph friend, thought Julia. “Yes, ” said Gabriel, as if he’d anticipated her question. “I would like to extend my attention to the rest of your body, but I don’t think a full massage would be possible for us, at least not now. ” His eyes darkened slightly as their eyes met. He switched his attention to her other foot and lowered his eyes. “I already hunger for your body, Julianne. I’m not strong enough to touch you chastely, not if you were laid out before me wrapped only in a bed sheet. ” They sat in silence for a few moments while Gabriel tended to Julia’s feet. At length, he sat back on his heels, running light fingertips up and down her stockings. “I’ll drive you home, if you wish, and we can talk tomorrow. Or you can stay here. You could sleep in my room, and I’ll take the guestroom. ” He searched her eyes uncertainly. “I don’t want to prolong this, ” she offered. “So I’d like to talk, if that’s all right. ” “That’s fine. Can I offer you something to drink? ” Gabriel motioned toward the kitchen. “I can open a bottle of wine. Or fix you a cocktail. ” He gazed at her intensely. “Please let me do something for you. ” A flame ignited in Julia’s middle, flaring up and passing over her. But she suppressed it. “Water, please. I need a clear head. ” He stood up and walked to the kitchen. Julia heard him wash his hands followed by the sounds of the refrigerator and freezer doors opening and closing. He returned to her with a tall glass filled with Perrier, ice, and pieces of lime. “Um, Gabriel, would you excuse me for a minute? ” “Take as long as you need. Come to the fire when you’re ready. ” He attempted a smile, but his face was too tense to make it genuine. She disappeared with her drink, and Gabriel assumed she was using this opportunity to steel herself for the next revelation from his miserable, damned existence. Or maybe she was going to lock herself in the bathroom and demand to speak to him through the door. Not that he would blame her. Julia’s mind was traveling at light speed. She didn’t know what Gabriel was going to say. She didn’t know how she would respond. It was quite possible that she would learn things that would make it impossible for their relationship to continue, and the thought crushed her. For no matter what he’d done or with whom, she loved him. The thought of losing him again, after the joy of reconnecting, was agonizing. Gabriel sat in his red velvet chair staring vacantly into the fireplace. Dressed as he was and brooding, he looked very much like a character out of one of the Brontë s’ novels. As Julia approached him, she silently prayed to Charlotte that Gabriel would be one of her ilk and not of her sister Emily’s. Pardon me, Miss Charlotte, but Heathcliff terrifies me. Please don’t let Gabriel be a Heathcliff. (No offense to you, Miss Emily. ) Please. From where Julia stood, he could not see her. She cleared her throat to alert him of her presence. He gestured to the fire. “Come warm yourself. ” She made as if to sit on the carpet in front of the fire, but his hand shot out to stop her. He forced a smile. “Please. Sit on my lap. Or the ottoman or the sofa. ” He still doesn’t like me on the floor, Julia thought. She hadn’t objected to the idea of sitting at the hearth. But the mere idea more than offended him. Not willing to argue over such a trivial thing, she eschewed his lap for the ottoman and sat quietly, gazing at the blue and orange flames. He was no longer The Professor in her mind; he was Gabriel, her professor, her beloved. Gabriel shifted in his chair, wondering why she wanted to be so far away from him. Because she knows what you are now and she’s afraid. “Why don’t you like me on my knees? ” she asked, breaking the silence. “Perhaps in light of tonight’s conversation, you can divine the reason. A reason multiplied and strengthened by what you told me at your apartment. ” He paused and looked at her pointedly. “You’re far too humble as it is, and people take advantage of your sweet nature. ” “Graduate students have to pay their dues. Everyone knows that. ” “Being a student has nothing to do with it. ” “You will always be the gifted professor, and I will always be your student, ” she remarked quietly. “You forget that I met you long before you were a student and I was a professor. And you won’t be a student forever. I shall sit in the front row when you deliver your first lecture. As for your prejudice against professors, if you prick us, do we not bleed? ” “And if you wrong us, shall we not revenge? ” Julia countered. Gabriel sat back in his chair and indulged himself in an appreciative smile. “See? Who is the teacher now, Professor Mitchell? I only claim the advantages of age and experience. ” “Age doesn’t necessarily make you wiser. ” “Of course not. You’re young, but you’re industrious and bright and at the very beginning of what promises to be a long and brilliant career. Perhaps I haven’t done enough to show my admiration for your mind. ” She fell silent, pretending to be mesmerized by the dancing, licking flames. He cleared his throat. “Ann didn’t hurt me, Julianne. I hardly think of her, and when I do, it’s with regret. She left no scars. ” Julia turned her troubled eyes to look into his. They were a lively, earnest navy. “Not all scars mark the skin. Why did you choose her, of all people? ” He shrugged, turning away to peer at the fire. “Why do human beings do anything? Because they’re searching for happiness. She promised raw, intense pleasure, and I needed the diversion. ” “You let her hurt you because you were bored? ” Julia felt instantly ill. Gabriel’s features hardened. “I don’t expect you to understand. But at the time, I needed a distraction. It was either pain or alcohol, and I was not about to do anything that might get back to Richard and Grace. I tried…interacting with women, but my liaisons quickly lost their luster. Perpetually available but mindless orgasms can become tiresome, Julianne. ” I’ll remember that, she thought. “The way Professor Singer was with you at the lecture…then at dinner…she doesn’t behave like a woman scorned. ” “She despises weakness. And she can’t accept failure. It was a harsh blow to her reputation and her massive ego when she tried to control me and failed. She isn’t about to advertize her failure. ” “Did you care for her at all? ” “Hardly. She’s a soulless, heartless succubus. ” Julia looked back at the fire and pursed her lips. “I was not about to jump into something with Ann without testing it. And we never got beyond the test. In other words, although we…interacted, I was not involved with her in the strict sense. ” “You’ll have to excuse me if I don’t own the specific vocabulary that would allow me to understand what you’re trying to say. ” “I’m trying to explain this to you without tainting more of your innocence than is absolutely necessary. Do not require me to be explicit. ” His tone was suddenly cold. “Do you still want what she offers? ” “No. It was a disaster. ” “With someone else? ” “No. ” “But what about the next time the darkness comes? What will you do? ” Gabriel stared at her. “I thought I’d made myself clear. You dispel the darkness, Beatrice. ” He cleared his throat. “Julianne. ” “Tell me she isn’t in one of your photographs. ” “Absolutely not. Those pictures were of women I actually liked. ” “Why were you thrown out of her house? ” He gritted his teeth. “I did something that in her world is absolutely unacceptable. And I won’t lie and say that I didn’t enjoy the look on her face when I gave her a taste of her own medicine. Even though I broke one of my most sacred rules in doing so. ” Julia shuddered. “Then why is she still after you? ” “I represent her failure, her inability to control. And I possess certain skills. ” She flushed uncomfortably. “Ann was also interested in my pugilistic abilities. When she learned that I was a boxer and a member of Oxford’s Fencing Club, she wouldn’t leave me alone. We share those hobbies, unfortunately. ” Julia fingered the scar that was hidden underneath her hair. “I can’t be with someone who hits, Gabriel. Not out of anger, not for pleasure, not for any reason. ” “And you shouldn’t. It is not in my nature to be violent with women, but rather, to be seductive. Ann was an exception. And if you knew the circumstances, I think you’d forgive me. ” “I can’t be with someone who wants to be hit, either. Violence frightens me, Gabriel. Please understand this. ” “I do. I understand. I thought that what Ann offered would help me deal with my problems. ” He shook his head sadly. “Julianne, nothing was as painful as the moment in which I had to look you in the eye and admit my sordid entanglement with her. I wish for your sake I had no past. I wish I was as good as you. ” Julia looked down at her hands, which were twisting in her lap. “The thought of someone hurting you…treating you like an animal…” Her voice began to tremble as her eyes slowly filled with tears. “I don’t care if you had sex with her. I don’t care if she didn’t leave any marks. I can’t bear the thought of someone hurting you, especially because you wanted them to. ” Gabriel pressed his lips together but said nothing. “The mere thought of someone hitting you makes me sick. ” He clenched his jaw as he watched two lone tears slide down her cheeks. “You should be with someone who will be kind to you. ” She wiped her face with the back of her hand. “Promise me you’ll never go back to her. Or to someone like her. ” Gabriel gazed at her sharply. “I promised that you wouldn’t have to share me. I keep my promises. ” She shook her head. “I meant—ever. After me. Promise. ” He growled. “You say it as if it’s a foregone conclusion that there will be an after. ” She wiped away another tear. “Promise me you won’t let anyone abuse you in order to punish yourself. No matter what happens. ” He gritted his teeth. “Promise me, Gabriel. I will never ask you for anything else, but promise me this. ” His eyes narrowed, and he measured her carefully. Then, seemingly satisfied, he nodded. “I promise. ” Julia’s body relaxed, and she hung her head, physically and emotionally exhausted. He’d been watching her closely, the alternating flush and paleness of her skin, the way she’d fidgeted and pulled at her dress. It hurt him more than he thought possible to see her so upset. And the sight of her tears… The brown-eyed angel was weeping over the demon. The angel wept because she was grieved at the mere thought of someone hurting him. Without a word, he pulled her onto his lap. He pressed her head gently against his chest, wrapping his arms around her. “No more weeping. I’ve seen enough tears from you to last a lifetime, ” he whispered, pressing his lips to her ear. “And I’m not worth a single one. ” He sighed with regret. “I’ve done a very selfish thing in pursuing you, Julianne. You should be with someone your own age who is your equal in goodness. Not with some twisted Caliban like me. ” “There are moments when you are my equal in innocence. ” “When? Tell me. ” “When you hold me in your arms. When you stroke my hair, ” she whispered. “When we’re in bed. ” His face took on a pained expression. “If you don’t want me, all you have to do is say so, and I’ll disappear from your life forever. I don’t want you to be afraid of what might happen if you reject me. I promise I’ll let you go, if that’s what you want. ” Julia was quiet, for she did not know what to say. “I know that I am controlling and, as you put it, commanding. ” Gabriel’s voice was low and strained. “But I would never do to you what she does. I won’t harm you, Julianne. I could never harm you. ” He lightly trailed his fingertips up and down the exposed flesh of her arm, feeling the skin goose-pimple underneath his words as much as beneath his touch. “I was more worried about what Ann did to you. ” “No one has worried about me for some time. ” “Your family does. And I did too, you know, even before I came to Toronto. I thought of you every day. ” He pressed a gentle kiss to her lips, and Julia reciprocated softly. “My past indiscretions notwithstanding, my tastes run to inflicting mad, passionate pleasure on my lovers and not pain, I assure you. Someday I’d like to show you that side of me. Slowly, of course. ” Julia chewed at the inside of her mouth, trying to find the right words. “I need to tell you something. ” “Yes? ” “I am—not as innocent as you think I am. ” “What’s that supposed to be mean? ” he snapped. She raked her upper lip with her teeth nervously. “Sorry. You took me by surprise. ” Gabriel rubbed at his eyes. “I had a boyfriend. ” He frowned. “I know that. ” “We, um, did things. ” His eyebrows shot up. “What kinds of things? ” His question emerged before he could consider it, but he soon thought better of it. “Don’t answer that. I don’t want to know. ” “I am not as innocent as I was when you first met me, which means that you have, um…an idealized and false perception of me. ” He considered her admission for a moment. He wanted to know the specifics, but he was worried about what she might say. The thought of someone else, of him, coaxing pleasure out of her, or even touching her, infuriated him. He was far from certain that he could handle whatever confession she was burning to make. “You were my first kiss. The first to hold my hand, ” she admitted. “I’m glad. ” He took her hand in his and pressed his lips against it. “I wish I had been all your firsts. ” “He didn’t take them all. ” Julia closed her mouth quickly. She hadn’t meant to say that. Her use of the word take made Gabriel think murderous thoughts. If he ever found himself in the same room as him he would rip his throat out with his bare hands. “When you didn’t come back, I started dating someone. In Philadelphia. And things, uh, happened. ” “Did you want those things to happen? ” Julia squirmed. “He was my boyfriend. He was—impatient sometimes. ” “That’s what I thought. He was a manipulative bastard who seduced you. ” “I have a free will. I didn’t have to give in. ” Gabriel was thoughtful for a moment. Jealousy—the idea of her hands and her lips wrapped around someone else—or someone else’s mouth on her. Her body…“I have no right to ask this, but I will. Did you love him? ” “No. ” He tried to hide his secret relief at her answer by lifting her chin. “Don’t ever touch me or let me touch you unless you truly want me. That’s a promise I’d like to exact from you right now. ” She blinked at him in surprise. “I know what I can be like. So far I’ve kept my passions in check. But I’ve been forward with you, I know, and on more than one occasion I’ve made you uncomfortable. It would trouble me to discover that things progressed between us solely because you felt coerced. ” “I promise, Gabriel. ” He nodded at her and pressed his lips to her forehead. “Julianne, why won’t you let me call you Beatrice? ” “It made me sad that you never wanted to know my name. ” He gazed at her intensely. “I want more than that. I want to know the real you. ” She smiled. “So do you still want me? Or would you rather I let you go? ” He tried to keep his voice steady. “Of course I still want you. ” He kissed her softly before placing her on her feet and leading her to the kitchen. When she was comfortably seated on one of the bar stools, he walked over to the counter and picked up a large, silver dome. He grinned at her, his eyes glinting mischievously as he placed the plate in front of her. “Homemade apple pie, ” Gabriel announced, removing the dome with a flourish. “Pie? ” “You said no one ever baked a pie for you before. Now someone has. ” Julia stared at the dessert incredulously. “You made this? ” “Not exactly. My housekeeper did. Are you pleased? ” “You had someone bake a pie for me? ” “Well, I had hoped you’d share it. But if you insist on eating the entire thing by yourself…” He chuckled. Julia covered her mouth with her hand and closed her eyes. “Julianne? ” When she didn’t respond he started speaking very quickly. “You said you liked pie. When you told me about growing up in St. Louis, you said no one had ever baked you a pie. I thought…” He stopped, suddenly very unsure of himself. Her shoulders shook as she silently cried. “Julia? What’s wrong? ” His voice was frantic as he watched her cry again. He walked around the counter and enveloped her shaking figure in his arms. “What did I do? ” “I’m sorry. ” She found her voice. “Sweetheart, don’t be sorry. Just tell me what I did so I can fix it. ” “You didn’t do anything wrong. ” She wiped her tears. “No one has ever done something like this for me before. ” She gave him a half-smile. “I didn’t know you had a present waiting here for me. ” “I didn’t mean to upset you. I was trying to make you happy. ” “They’re happy tears. Sort of. ” Julia giggled half-heartedly. He hugged her one more time and released her, smoothing her hair back behind her shoulders. “I think someone needs dessert. ” Gabriel cut a large serving of pie and held a fork in front of her. “I’d like to feed you. But I’ll understand if you’d rather I didn’t. ” Julia opened her mouth immediately, and Gabriel fed her a small piece. “Mmmmmm. It’s really good, ” she said with her mouth full and grinned as she brushed the crumbs from her lips. “I’m glad. ” “I didn’t know you had a housekeeper. ” “She’s only here twice a week. ” “And she cooks? ” “Sometimes. I go through stages. Obsessions, really, but you knew that already. ” He tapped her nose with his finger. “This was her grandmother’s recipe. I won’t tell you what she put in the crust to make it flaky. ” He winked at her. “What about you? No pie? ” she asked. “I’d rather watch you enjoy yourself. But this isn’t a proper dinner. I wish you’d let me cook for you. ” “My dad always eats a slice of cheese with his apple pie. I’d have some cheese if you have it. ” Gabriel appeared puzzled by her request but immediately rummaged in the refrigerator and soon presented her with a substantial piece of aged Vermont white cheddar. “Perfect, ” she murmured. After she’d finished her pie, she sat quietly, wondering if she should go home. She really didn’t want to, but perhaps after so many tears and so much drama he wouldn’t want her to stay. “You didn’t respond to my note, ” he said after a protracted silence. “The note I sent with the gardenias. ” “I wrote an e-mail. ” “But you left something out. ” Julia paused. “I didn’t know what to say about the taming part. ” “You told me the dialogue with the fox was your favorite. I thought it would be clear. ” “I know what the fox meant. But you…” She shook her head. “Then I’ll tell you. I don’t expect you to trust me, but I would like to earn your trust. Maybe once you trust me with your mind, you’ll begin to trust me with your body. That’s the sort of taming I have in mind. I want to pay close attention to you…to your wants, needs, and desires…and take my time attending to them. ” “How will you tame me? ” “By showing you with my actions that I am worthy of trust. And by doing this. ” Gabriel stood in front of her and clasped her face in his hands, bringing his mouth inches from hers. She closed her eyes and held her breath, waiting for their lips to meet. But they didn’t. Warm air from between Gabriel’s curled and parted lips floated across her mouth. Her tongue peeked out, slowly wetting her lower lip in anticipation. The feel of his breath across the wetness caused a shiver to shoot down her spine. “You’re trembling, ” he whispered, pushing more warm breath across her mouth. Julia felt herself blush against his hands, the warmth traveling across her face and down her neck. “I can feel you flushing, your skin blossoming in heat and color. ” He stroked her eyebrows, and she opened her eyes, staring into large, dark-blue pools. “Your pupils are dilated. ” He smiled against her mouth, barely grazing her lips. “And I can hear your breathing speed. You know what that means. ” Julia searched his eyes. “He said I was frigid. ” She sounded ashamed. “Cold like snow. It made him angry. ” “Only a boy who knew nothing about women could be so blind and so ridiculous. Never think that about yourself, Julianne. I know for a fact that it’s far from true. ” His lips curved into a seductive smile. “I can tell when you’re aroused, like now. I can see it in your eyes. I can feel it on your skin. I can—sense it. ” Gabriel traced a single finger across her eyebrows to relax them. “Please don’t be embarrassed. I’m not. It’s tantalizing and very erotic. ” She closed her eyes and inhaled his scent—Aramis and peppermint and blessed Gabriel. He chuckled. “I think you’re telling me that you enjoy my cologne. ” He leaned down so that her nose was able to skim his neck. The scent of Aramis was stronger there. “What are you doing? ” “I’m building desire, Julianne. Now tell me what you want. You’re flushed, your heart is beating rapidly, and I can hear your breathing accelerate. What do you desire? ” He cupped her face in his hands again and brought his mouth close to hers. Close, but still not touching. “I want to kiss, ” she breathed. He smiled. “I want to kiss too. ” She waited. And still he would not move. “Julianne, ” he blew across her lips. She opened her eyes. “Take what you want. ” She inhaled sharply. “If you don’t initiate on occasion, I’ll conclude that you don’t want me. That I’m being demanding. After a night like tonight, the only person doing the demanding should be you. ” Gabriel’s eyes were wide and dark, and they pierced her. She didn’t need another invitation. Surprising both of them, she wrapped her arms around his neck and tugged him forward. When their lips met, his hands trailed down to her lower back, and he imagined caressing her naked flesh. She teased his bottom lip and drew it into her mouth, copying an act he’d performed with her before. She was less skilled, but he was no less pleased. Her unhurried ardor enticed him, and within a moment, he felt his skin heat and his heart race. For as his tongue expertly explored her mouth, he wished nothing more than to part her modest knees with one of his own and press himself against her. And sweep her into his bedroom to fraternize… He pulled away, placing his hands on her bare forearms. “I have to stop. ” He leaned his forehead against hers and exhaled deeply. “I’m sorry. ” He pressed his lips to her forehead. “Never apologize for acting on your desires. You’re beautiful and sensual. And very, very arousing. I can enjoy you without becoming more intimate, but I can’t kiss you again. Not right now. ” They stood frozen, holding each other for several minutes, until Gabriel opened his eyes and stroked her cheek. “Whatever you want, Julianne. Tonight, I’m yours. Do you want me to take you home? Do you want to stay? ” She nuzzled his jaw with her nose. “I’d like to stay. ” “Then I think it’s time for bed. ” He extended his hand and helped her to her feet. “Doesn’t it seem strange to you? Sharing a bed with me? ” “I want you in my arms and in my bed every night. ” Julia was quiet for a moment as she picked up her messenger bag. “Does that bother you? ” He frowned. “No. Maybe it should. ” “I’ve missed you this week. ” “I missed you too. ” “I sleep better when you’re in my arms. ” He smiled at her warmly. “But it’s your choice where you sleep tonight. ” “I’d like to share your bed, ” said Julia shyly. “If you’d let me. ” “I’d never deny you that. ” He led her down the hallway to his bedroom. She sat on the bed, and he picked up the framed photograph from on top of the dresser. “You have a picture of me under your pillow. I thought I should return the favor. ” Gabriel smirked as he handed her the photograph. Julia racked her brain to try to remember when he could have found the old photo she had of him. “How did you get this? ” “I should be asking you where you obtained a picture of me from my days on Princeton’s rowing team. ” Gabriel untucked and unbuttoned his dress shirt, exposing the tight T-shirt that clung to his chest. Julia grew embarrassed and looked away, silently ruing the day men decided to wear undershirts. Watching him undress was even sexier than watching him in a purple towel that was far too small. “Um, Rachel had it on her bulletin board. And the first time I saw it, I took it. ” He leaned down to lift her face up so that he could examine her expression. “You took it? You mean, you stole it. ” “I know I shouldn’t have. But you had this wonderful smile. I was seventeen and stupid, Gabriel. ” “Stupid or smitten? ” Julia rested her eyes on the floor. “I think you know. ” “Rachel took pictures with her phone while she was visiting. This one is my favorite, which is why I framed it. ” He examined her closely. “Don’t you like it? ” She seemed flustered. “You look nice. ” He took the photo out of her hand and carefully placed it on top of the dresser. “What are you thinking? Tell me. ” “The way you looked at me while we were dancing…I don’t understand. ” “You’re a beautiful woman. Why wouldn’t I look at you? ” “It’s the way you looked at me. ” “I look at you like that all the time. ” He kissed her softly. “I’m looking at you like that right now. ” He brushed her hair back from her face. “I’ll be back in a few minutes. ” After changing into what would serve as her pajamas, she stood in the doorway of the bathroom, backlit in white light. “Stop, ” said Gabriel. He had returned to the room during her absence and was lying in bed, staring at her. Julia looked down at her clothes and fidgeted. She hadn’t known what to wear. Most of her pajamas were too juvenile to wear in front of him, and she didn’t own any lingerie for sleeping. Not that she would have been brave enough to wear lingerie to bed with him. So at this moment, she was clad in a dark blue T-shirt, which was large enough to hide her chest, and a pair of athletic shorts that had Saint Joseph’s University’s logo on the front. “You’re exquisite. ” She made a face and reached over to switch off the light. “Wait. Standing there, in the light, you look like an angel. ” She nodded to indicate that she’d heard him before silently joining him. Gabriel immediately pulled her into a warm embrace, and as he did so, she realized he was wearing a T-shirt and shorts too. They were quite a pair. But now their naked legs could tangle together blissfully under the sheets. He kissed her tenderly and leaned back on the pillow, sighing in pleasure as she rested her head on his chest, wrapping her arm around his waist. “I’m sorry you’re lonely, Julianne. ” She appeared puzzled by his non sequitur. “Earlier this week when we were talking on the phone, you mentioned that you feel isolated, that you don’t have any friends. ” She winced in remembrance. “What if I were to buy you a kitten or a rabbit? Someone to keep you company at your apartment. ” “Gabriel, I appreciate the thought, but you can’t just throw money at my problems. ” “I know that. But I can spend money to try to make you smile. ” He kissed her again. “Kindness is worth more than all the money in the world. ” “You shall have that. And much, much more. ” “That’s all I want. ” “Stay for the weekend. Here. With me. ” She hesitated only for an instant. “Okay, ” she whispered. He seemed relieved. “How about a fish? They’re the new companion animal. ” She laughed. “I don’t think so. I can barely look after myself, let alone another poor creature. ” He lifted her chin so that they could see one another. “Then let me look after you, ” he whispered, eyes intense and unblinking. “You could have any woman you want, Gabriel. ” He furrowed his eyebrows. “I only want you. ” She rested her head against his chest and smiled. “Being without you, Julianne, is like enduring an endless night without stars. ”