Chapter 9

She spooned thick tomato sauce onto Eric’s spaghetti. He counted the chunks of Italian sausage, and saw that she was giving him more than usual. Too many chunks to count. He smiled up at her.

‘Did you have a good day at school? ’ she asked.

He thought about his troubles with Nate and Mr Doons. He sure wouldn’t tell Mom about that. ‘I got invited to a Halloween party, ’ he said.

‘Oh? That sounds nice. When is it? ’

‘Halloween night. ’

She stepped to her side of the kitchen table, and began serving herself. ‘Who’s having it? ’

‘Somebody from school. ’

‘Anyone I know? ’

He shook his head. ‘It’s a costume party. ’

‘What’ll you wear? ’

‘Haven’t decided. ’

She sat down. ‘Would you like to say grace? ’

He lowered his head, and rattled off his memorized prayer. ‘Dear God, who giveth us food for the body and truth for the mind, so enlighten and nourish us that we may grow wise and strong to do thy will, Amen. ’

‘Amen, ’ she mumbled.

Eric started to stir his spaghetti. ‘Are you going out? ’

‘Tonight? No, I don’t think …’

‘I mean on Halloween. ’

She shook her head. ‘I’ll stay here for the trick-or-treaters, I guess. ’

‘Will Sam come over? ’

He watched her face turn red. ‘Sam has to work. He’s a policeman. ’

‘He is? ’

‘He’s an awfully nice man, Eric. We’ve been … I’ve been seeing him for a long time, now. We’re very good friends. ’

‘Oh. ’

‘He’d like to meet you. ’

‘I don’t want to meet him. ’

‘Eric. ’ She sounded sad. ‘He’s my friend. ’

‘Must be. ’ Eric took a bite of sausage, and slowly chewed. It was his favorite meat, but he felt tight inside and he didn’t want to swallow.

‘I’m sorry you ran into him, that way. ’

‘Does he come here every nigh

t? ’

‘No. He’s only been here a few times. ’

‘Sneaking around. ’

‘He does not sneak around. I just didn’t want you to meet him, yet, because … things don’t always turn out and I didn’t want you getting attached to him, like you did with John and Raymond. ’

He managed to swallow. He pushed at his spaghetti, but didn’t take another bite. ‘You shouldn’t go messing around with men if you aren’t married. ’

‘You don’t have to be married to love someone. ’

‘Then you get kids without fathers. ’

‘You have a father. ’

‘Oh yeah? Where is he? ’

‘He went away. ’

‘Because he got you pregnant and you weren’t married. ’

‘That isn’t why. ’

‘Then why? ’

‘He asked me to marry him, but I wouldn’t. ’

‘Why not? ’

‘Your father wasn’t a nice man. ’

‘Then why did you … go with him? ’

‘I didn’t. ’ She stared at her spaghetti. So far, she hadn’t taken a single bite. ‘He was just a guy in school. We hardly knew each other. He followed me home, one day, and nobody was there but me, and – well, things happened. We were both only sixteen, and … He got kicked out of school, and got a job at a gas station. He wanted me to marry him, but I just told him no. And then he left town, about a month before you were born, and he never came back. ’

‘You should’ve married him. ’

‘How can you say that? You don’t even know him. ’

‘You should’ve. You should’ve let me have a dad. It’s not fair. ’

Her eyes got shiny and her mouth started to tremble. She pushed herself away from the table.

Eric started to cry. She’d made his favorite meal, and now everything was ruined. ‘Mom, I’m sorry. ’

‘Never mind, ’ she sobbed. ‘Just never mind. ’ She rushed out of the room.

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