CHAPTER SEVEN

'You look beautiful, Rachael! ' said Lady Ross, scrutinising her granddaughter with a critical eye. 'But there's something in your face that bothers me, a little reckless light. It reminds me of Dirk. '

'What's wrong with looking like my father? '

'Turn round. '

Rachael did so, pirouetting slightly, so that her chiffon skirt floated out about her. 'I'm going to a party, yet it seems like a battlefield, ' she confessed.

'What a very strange thing to say! '

'Mrs Maybury will be there, ' Rachael supplied, as if that answered everything.

'So? ' her grandmother asked_? after a moment's consideration. _

'So Mrs Maybury doesn't like me. '

'Is that important, darling? Nick obviously does. '

'Why does Nick like me? '

'Oh, Rachael! ' Her grandmother gave a truly Gallic gesture. 'He'd have a hard time not liking you. '

'I love him. '

'I know that, ' her grandmother said softly.

'Then what am I going to do about it, Gran? You're the oracle. '

'Well, my powers are somewhat depleted, but I'd advise you to sit still and wait. '

'What, for a wedding! Nick's and Vanessa Maybury's? What a nightmare. '

Her grandmother just looked at her. 'I think if I've learned anything at all, Rachael, it's that the most carefully laid plans go astray. '

'I'm sorry, Gran. ' Rachael put her arms around her grandmother and hugged her. 'But Mrs Maybury told me she and Nick were getting married in the New Year. '

'Strange that Nick hasn't mentioned it, and I was only speaking to him yesterday. '

'You really like him, don't you, Gran? '

'He makes me feel young again, so I can well imagine his effect on you. '

'Perhaps it's a crush? ' Rachael turned back to the mirror to examine her face.

'Perhaps it is, ' her grandmother said lightly. 'Time will tell. Are you going to wear my pendant? '

'Yes, thank you. You know, I couldn't stay here if it happened, Gran. '

'Let's take each hurdle as it comes. We've been doing quite well lately. Even at eighty one can grow another skin. Actually dear old Mag suggested a boat trip. '

'At seventy-eight? ' Rachael whirled round in surprise.

'I'm seventy-nine, Rachael, and I'd be keen to go. I haven't seen London or Paris in years, let alone Canada or the United States. I thought we might all go. Allie as well. She's been so good to us I'd like to reward her. Not when I'm dead and gone but now. Maggie thinks a trip might be just the answer. You know how she loves company and travelling. '

'I can foresee a trickling exodus into the sea, ' said Rachael drily.

'Don't be silly, darling, Maggie is very much admired. She had lots and lots of admirers when she was younger, '

'That's just what I mean. Sometimes Maggie forgets she's seventy-eight. Well, at least Allie would be there to look after you. '

'Maggie is very efficient as well, dear. '

'She's not Allie, Gran. Allie knows when to call a halt. You are a dark horse. '

'I know, and I love my little girl. Think about it, darling. There's always an escape route. Now, when you go up to the house, kindly remember who you are. '

'And who am I? ' Rachael laughed.

Her grandmother, however, was quite serious. 'You're a Ross, dear. That means you must conduct yourself accordingly. Don't do anything impulsive, and do steer clear of Mrs Maybury. After all, it's for your own good. I know you're going to have a lovely time. Nick will see to it. '

The telephone rang in the hallway and a moment later Allie came up the stairs and along to Rachael's bedroom. 'That was Nick. He said he'd pick you up in five minutes. '

'That was nice of him, ' Lady Ross said complacently.

'He doesn't have to leave his own party to do that! ' Rachael protested. 'I told him I'd walk. '

'Obviously he wants to take you himself, kiddo! '

'I'm not shy, ' Rachael maintained.

'We knew that long ago, dearie. '

'Well, Allie, what do you think? '

'You look like a canna lily. What a trick to match up your dress with your eyes. Only two people I've ever known have had your colour eyes. '

'That's the way of it! ' Lady Ross smiled. 'Lew used to call them " Cleopatra's eyes". '

'No use arguing with that one! ' Allie circled Rachael's standing figure, looking for any possible flaw, but could find none. 'I wish I could go with you, ' she said wistfully.

'I promised Nick-we'd go up to the house over Christmas, Allie, ' Lady Ross said. 'I'll feel better by then. He tells me he's made a few changes that I'll be interested to see. He's a man of great sensibility, Nick. '

Rachael gave a faint smile. 'Well, he can't do anything wrong in your eyes, Gran. '

'I knew that the moment I met him. If we had to lose our home at least it's to a man I feel I know and understand. Swans' Reach is in good hands. '

'Nevertheless, it's ironic, ' Rachael said slowly. 'Remember how much I opposed him? '

'Do we ever! ' Allie snorted. 'You ought to learn something from that. '

'Some lessons are salutary, some can be hell. '

'Now, now, Rachael, you're going to enjoy yourself. Take that expression off your face, it troubles me. '

'How's that? ' Rachael gave her familiar, heart-stopping smile.

'Beautiful, dear! '

'I cannot but agree, ' Allie said extravagantly. 'Don't worry, kid, I'm always on your side. '

Rachael's first reaction when she saw Nick was that her love for him must be blazing all over her. She couldn't, after all, tell him, so she acted out almost the reverse. He didn't seem to see anything peculiar in this, for his blue glance made her go weak at the knees. The house was a blaze of lights, like a ship at sea in the soft purple darkness. For a second only her skin went icy, because she loved it and her whole life had been altered. Nick eased the big car into the garage and turned off the ignition.

'Ready? I won't tell you how beautiful you look. There will be plenty of others to do that. '

'Nevertheless I'd like to hear it from you. '

He held her chin and inspected her face. 'You remind me of any number of flowers. Roses, tulips, lilies, it all depends what you wear. '

'That's nice enough, Nick. No wonder my grandmother's in love with you. '

'And that's bad? '

'No. I'm pleased. I really am. '

'And what about you? ' asked Nick. 'A few months ago to my certain knowledge you were nursing a violent hate. '

'Yes, it even surprised me. '

'And now? '

'Don't try to turn my head. It's no good for you to try. '

'To be a success, Rachael, ' he said lightly, 'one has to overcome challenges! '

'This one won't be easy. '

'Really? ' He came round to her and helped her out of the car. 'You're only pretending to be so serious, you're trembling. '

'I didn't say I didn't enjoy your company, Nick. I just expect you to act responsibly. '

'What a struggle when you look so magical. '

'Shall we go up? ' she said.

'Certainly. I think you'll approve of my friends. I find them pretty interesting myself. '

'Are they all from the law world? '

'Good lord, no, but none of them are struggling. Come and see! '

Upstairs, the big reception rooms of the house had been redecorated in a different, perhaps more vital style than that of Rachael's grandfather's time. The traditional had gained a new dimension, for several of the most beautiful pieces of furniture were original to the house, the great chandeliers remained, but the inspiration was essentially very modern, the more formal ambience giving way to function and comfort and a perfect balance of the old and the new. Rachael looked around swiftly, and found absolutely nothing to criticise. Without her grandfather's gorgeous clutter the rooms looked bigger than ever, and they were ideal for large parties. The wallpaper had been changed and it toned beautifully with the existing carpet, but where the original colour scheme had been muted, it now sang, the crimson of the beautiful area rug in front of the fireplace illuminating the gold carpet and repeated in the motif of the drapery. The new sofas that faced one another across an oriental coffee table were upholstered in gold velvet, and the rest of the pieces, the ornaments and paintings were in excellent taste. Coming into the house she had known a certain fear, a vulnerability, a sadness, but somehow this had become Nick's house, not Grandfather's. Apart from the big change in style, they both had one thing in common, a very confident artistic eye.

'Well? ' said Nick, lifting an eyebrow at her.

'I thought this would upset me, Nick. '

'I know you did. Is it my house, Rachael, or are you going to live with your ghosts? '

'Grandfather is still here, don't worry. '

'Exuberant, forceful, a real personality, I'll be pleased to have him. Nonetheless, this is my home now. '

'Yes, I can see that. '

'Do—you—like—it, Rachael? ' He drew her to him, spacing out his words.

'Is it important to you, Nick, what I think? '

'I've learned I have to drag things out of you. '

'Then I'm being very mean. My dearest grandfather would congratulate you. He would say you have real style, character. Grandfather was a great one for character. I congratulate you too, Nick. The house doesn't make me sad. It's still my friend. '

'You funny child, I think you love the house best of all. Would you marry me for it? '

'Certainly not. It's high time you found a suitable woman. '

'What are you afraid of? '

She was moving swiftly away from him. 'I'm trying to join the party, Nick. '

'Oh, is that all? ' he said airily. 'You can be sure they'll all welcome you. Especially my friend Tony. '

That, at least, was true. Young men of her own age group sometimes went in awe of Rachael's assurance and beauty, but Nick's bachelor friends had no such inhibitions. She was swept up at once into a crowd of sophisticates and presently found herself enthroned in an armchair surrounded by three of Nick's particular friends, all of them male. Flame-like, with a natural charm of manner, she found she was enjoying herself immensely, her laughing amber eyes more provocative than she meant, her supreme self-confidence stemming mainly from the fact that none of them could mean anything to her. There was only Nick, and he was very busy doing his duty as host, in conversation here, there and everywhere, while Rachael allowed herself the luxury of following him about with her eyes. Every now and again he caught her at this betraying practice and gave her his white, faintly mocking, smile, his glance moving on to the bright, interested faces of his friends, all trained on her.

Tony was easily the most determined of them, and soon he decided he wanted to dance. Rachael found herself out on the terrace where other couples surged around them, relaxed and smiling, the women delectably dressed, counter-attractions to the more sombre dress of the men. Waiters were circling with trays of champagne and other drinks, and after a while Tony broke off to take two glasses, drawing Rachael down to the stone balustrade. He obviously considered himself a connoisseur of beautiful girls, but he was very light-hearted and funny, and good-looking too in a nut-brown way. Rachael kept up the conversation easily, but she could no longer see Nick.

About an hour later, Vanessa arrived with the same party of friends that had joined her at the auction, including Ronald. Rachael recognised them immediately. Vanessa looked perfect in a pewter satin evening shirt with a long claret-coloured satin skirt, a wide silver belt around her slender waist and ropes of pearls and glittering silver chains. Nick went to greet her, and all of the women of the party, Vanessa included, kissed him. Maybe it was a special kind of game, Rachael reasoned. All of them knew the rules, but he did not seem to lavish special time or attention on any one of them, and Ronald, who looked almost as colourful as the women in a kind of evening caftan, had his hand shaken very briefly.

'Ah, there's Van! ' Tony said, looking up from the ice cubes at the bottom of his glass. 'Do you know her? '

'Yes, we've met. '

'You don't sound very enthusiastic, ' Tony grinned, not beating about the bush himself. 'Come to that, I'm not very enthusiastic either. Can't see what Nick sees in her, though she is very striking. '

'I expect you've heard they're getting married? '

'What? ' Tony almost shrieked, his brown eyes snapping. 'That comes as a bit of a shock. '

Rachael immediately felt better. 'Perhaps I shouldn't have mentioned it. '

'Good lord! ' Tony said, almost indignantly. 'You'd think Nick would tell me a simple thing like that. '

'How long have you known him? '

'For ever! Since we were kids. Nick was always the cleverest kid in the class and I was always the dumbest until I turned about twelve. Are you sure you've got your research right? '

'Perhaps we'd better forget it. If it's true, no doubt Nick will tell you. '

'I'd say so. I'd just have to be his best man. Tell me, Rachael, what man can afford to ignore his friends? Now, Van, she's a very possessive woman. In fact I think she could, if she wished, insult you. She wouldn't be in the least afraid of snubbing Nick's humble friends. Of course with young Jon, the obvious solution is for Nick to remarry. '

'You must have known Jon's mother? ' Rachael asked quietly.

'Yes, I did. Anne was the sweetest possible person. None of us could believe it when she died. It was a tremendous shock to everybody, though poor old Nick bore the secret for a year, even from Anne. She adored him. He must be missing a woman like that from his life. But Vanessa now... she seems to lack something vital. Warmth, I'd call it, but who knows, she might be very different with Nick. She's probably got her good qualities and she can be very agreeable when she likes. But don't let's waste time talking about Van. Let's dance. ' Tony started to his feet, grasping her arm. 'Here comes McGuire, but I saw you first. Are you interested in sailing? I have a superb little boat, and there's the whole of the harbour at our disposal! '

Rachael had to agree that she liked sailing, but she didn't want to commit herself. Brett often took her out on his father's boat. They lived right on the blue sparkling harbour with their own boat shed and slipway. Tony was getting fairly insistent, and it was quite obvious that he was taken with her. His friend Jake McGuire was at that moment complaining to Nick about certain persons monopolising Nick's youngest and best-looking guest. Nick listened to him with strict impartiality, then decided it was the host's job to do that. He turned and made his way out on to the terrace, stopping here and there at some laughing group.

Floating past them on the terrace, Rachael heard a woman say:

'Why, Van must be the luckiest woman in the world. '

Tony's teasing voice became immediately serious. 'Did you hear that? '

'What does it mean? ' asked Rachael.

Tony followed the woman's progress with his eyes. 'That's a friend of Van's. Could be she heard the same news you did. And to think I grew up with Nick! '

'I don't think I can get over it myself. '

'Here's Nick now... Listen, old son! '

'No, you listen! ' Nick said humorously. 'This is my party and I'm dancing with Rachael. '

'Anything you say. Would you like me to go home? '

'No, it's all right. Go and see Jake, he's ready to push you off the roof. '

'Just because he can't hold Rachael's hand? '

'Something like that. Go on, Tony, move. '

'Why, bless your little heart, of course I will. Aren't I your friend? Coming with me tomorrow, Rachael? '

'Yes, thank you, Tony, I will. ' Rachael smiled at him, only at that moment deciding any such thing. If Nick excelled at double-dealing she could play her own game.

'And what does that mean? ' Nick asked her, taking her smoothly into his arms.

'Tony asked me out in his boat. '

'What a thrill! One of you will end up sour, possibly both. Tony's always having engine trouble. '

'You sound jealous. '

'Whisper it, Rachael. '

'How come you've left Vanessa alone? ' she asked.

'Is she alone? ' he asked in a. ruminative voice. 'I thought blessed Ronald was with her. '

'They have similar expressions. '

'So I've noticed. '

She looked away from him, her amber eyes glittery. 'Gran is thinking of going overseas for six months. '

He pulled back a little, staring down at her. 'Is she up to it, the travelling? She'll be heading into the winter. '

'The cold doesn't bother her. I'm thinking of going as well. '

His face seemed to tauten. 'When was all this decided? '

'Tonight, as a matter of fact. I've never travelled, you know. I'm looking forward to it. '

'You don't sound very cheerful. In fact I can feel the tension in you. What on earth's the matter now? '

'There you go again, Nick, ' she said jerkily. 'We'll never resolve our little differences. '

'Let's just say the only way to stop you is to kiss you thoroughly. '

'That would be extremely unwise, ' she said, feeling utterly distracted.

'It's a miracle to find you two minutes the same. You look as if you were sent to earth to dazzle men, not incite them to strangle you. '

'That sounds delightful! You can't mean it, Nick? '

'I seem to be slipping from my civilised stand. Yes, I do. '

'Why, I thought you'd be more impassive than anybody. I was very impressed with you the day I saw you in court. '

'And you stuck out a mile with those blatant black curls. '

'I thought I looked rather gorgeous. '

'You're unhappy. Can't you tell me why? '

Immediately she lowered her thick eyelashes. Nick just went on holding her in complete silence. Neither of them said a word, but something elemental was pulsing between them. A funny little shiver ran down Rachael's spine. Impulsively she moved closer to him, murmuring his name. He must know how she felt, for all her silly antagonism. She seemed to be locked in his arms unable to break free, the two of them moving in the sweetest, most natural rhythm. If she looked up at him now, her eyes would tell him she loved him. So there was no one but the two of them and she wished them to stay that way for ever.

'Rachael? '

Was he going to tell her now she was only a stupid child? It wouldn't come easily, because he was very kind, much kinder than she had ever expected. She felt a terrible ache of sadness.

'Don't say it, Nick. '

'Are you sure you know what I was going to say? Your skin is like satin. ' His hand moved lightly down her back.

'Please! ' There was a kind of pleading in her voice.

Almost as if she had prayed for deliverance, Jake McGuire came to claim his dance, saying he had waited quite long enough.

'End of your dance, Nick, I think. The duties of a host and all that! '

'I know how it is. ' Nick relinquished her, smiling in mock defeat. 'Jake's an architect, Rachael. You know, he figures out plans and how to build things. '

'But I don't have your success! ' Jake maintained.

'Didn't I work for it? '

'You did, boy! ' Jake said emphatically.

'Well then; ' Nick walked away from them, very urbane and elegant, and Jake turned to look down into Rachael's creamy face.

'Nick followed his father's footsteps into law and I took up architecture to settle a family argument. Mother wanted me to be a doctor, every family needs one, and Dad wanted me to go into the business. '

'Which is? '

'Building boats. That's how I met Tony. He launched me into Nick's charmed circle and am I grateful! Nick really knows how to live. What a fabulous place! '

'Yes, ' Rachael answered. Nick was now dancing with Vanessa, who for once looked surprisingly alive as if his blue gaze dusted her with diamonds. Jake talked all the while, but Rachael scarcely heard him. Nick looked just as attractive, just as attentive, dancing with any woman. Probably he made them all feel the same way. It was a gift, sexual magnetism, and he had it in plenty. She felt as though the evening was ending instead of hardly beginning. She had two options open to her, to wilt like so much crumpled tissue paper or to glitter. Pride made her decide on the latter.

From then on she seemed to be spinning non-stop, the centre of a bright, ever-changing circle. Only one group failed to surge around her, Vanessa and company, though they followed her vivacious progress with tight disapproving glances and numerous sotto voce comments. Sometimes a mercurial temperament came in handy. Rachael was giving the performance of her life. No one could have guessed what she felt inside, it was simply that she wasn't going to quit the field without her colours flying. Nick's friends evidently found her dazzling, for she received more invitations in one evening than she had ever collected in a dozen weeks. She knew that when it was all over, she would have a violent headache.

Supper was sumptuous. She had it with Tony, who was barely able to hold his attraction in check. Previously he had thought young girls a crashing bore, but Rachael seemed to be extremely poised and witty. He supposed it was her upbringing. It had taken him half the evening to find out she was that Ross girl. Nick hadn't breathed a word to him about Rachael's background. That then explained it. Her grandfather had been one of the city's most colourful personalities for many long years.

Rachael managed to hold Nick at bay, every time he came near her, but once when she was telling a few of his friends about the wondrous trip she was intending, he interjected quite clearly that it would 'do her the world of good! ' Nothing could be plainer. He simply didn't care one way or the other. She wasn't the only woman interested in Nick. Neither was Vanessa. More than half the women at the party seemed to be throwing themselves at him. Good looks coupled with money threw nine out of ten women into a silly, gushing flutter. It certainly put things into perspective for her. How easy it was for one to delude oneself, to read everything into nothing. She might be too impressionable, but her feelings ran deep. .

By the end of the evening she was exhausted and she couldn't put Nick off once more. She was astonished in any case by her own fearlessness, in fact she was near to tears after an evening of acting as if she had come straight from fairyland. Only Nick's hand locking her wrist was reality.

'I brought you and I'm going to take you home again, ' he said with no hint of gallantry or pleasure.

'I can easily walk! ' she said with some spirit. 'In any case, Tony has already asked me. '

'Tony has just been blinded by your excessive good looks. He doesn't really know you. '

'Surely he can be allowed to change that? '

'Not tonight, anyway! '

'Then this seems the moment to die. You're angry! '

'No, not really. It's just when I start something, I always finish it. '

'You're making me look conspicuous! ' she accused him: Vanessa was at that moment staring at her with absolute venom.

'Poor child! ' he murmured in a smooth, taunting voice. 'Could it be true you believe it? I mean, after such an extravagant evening. Most of them have gone off thinking you a sensation. Your grandfather would have been proud of you. '

She stared up at him, her topaz eyes brilliant. 'Oh no, you're striking the wrong note. You're the sensation. You could wreck any number of lives. '

'Be still! ' he stopped her, by pressing her hand, 'or I just won't be responsible for the consequences. '

The last of the guests were leaving, making drowsy contented exclamations, Tony disappointed but bearing up well, the women touching their lips to Nick's cheek, the men pumping his hand. There were snatches of renewed invitations, a painfully frosty 'Goodnight! ' from Vanessa to Rachael, though she held her body close to Nick, promising to see him tomorrow. At last it was all over.

'How charming! ' Rachael said. 'But shouldn't you have taken Vanessa home? '

'She has her own car. '

'Ah well! you'll see her tomorrow. '

'It would seem so. '

'You don't sound awfully sorry about it. The house looks beautiful, ' she said, swirling around, her skirt flying.

'Yes, it does. Come along, Rachael. I'd better take you home. '

'I could have gone by myself, ' she told him airily.

'You're so wrong. '

'I'm quite capable of it. '

'Come with me, Rachael, it's your only chance. '

Nick held out his hand and she smiled at him, as though she had only just then decided to surrender. 'All right, I will. '

'We'll, walk. '

'I shouldn't risk it, with you! '

'You will. '

'Don't feel sorry for me, Nick Retford! ' she warned him, catching his sparkling mocking glance. 'I'm going round the world; '

'You owe it to yourself, Rachael. '

'I do? '

'You sound uncertain. Are you sure you want to go? ' He looked down at her dreamy, confused face. 'Come on, I shouldn't keep you out of your bed. ' He pulled her out through the front door and shut it after them.

'I've got to be free, Nick! ' she protested. 'It's just something that has to be done. '

'You have to decide that, Rachael. I can't. I must admit you could spend a little time growing up?

'Oh, thank you! ' she said with emphasis. 'You certainly know how to put me in my place. '

'The trouble is you won't stay there. '

It was useless to protest that she really was a woman. The night sky was perfect, studded with stars, and she looked up at it with a mixture of delight and sadness. The Lodge seemed awfully far away, the garden an enormous scented jungle, the tunnel under the interlacing trees of the drive as black as ebony. Night was a new element with its own powerful excitement. The breeze fanned her flushed cheeks.

'Can I ask you one question, Nick? '

'As long as it's not too personal. '

'Are you really getting married in the New Year? '

'Yes. ' He said it with terrible, direct cruelty, probably meaning to be kind.

'Then I don't think you're a very honourable man, ' she informed him.

His hands at her waist were firm to the point of hardness. 'You're the first one to doubt it. '

'Did you kiss me by accident? ' she asked, with frightening intensity.

His low laugh infuriated her. 'Rachael, you're priceless! '

'Then for what reason did you do it? I'm not so stupid I can't learn something from it. '

'Some things are inevitable, Rachael. '

'That's not an acceptable answer. ' Furiously she broke away from him, her flying feet scarcely seeming to touch the ground. She ran lightly, swiftly, a natural sprinter. The lights of the Lodge flashed out through the trees. This was her home ground. Here she was the expert. She knew every inch of it. She could lose him. Her long skirt fluttered and whipped around her, her hair tossed into a riot of curls. He would be angry for a while, but he deserved it. It was monstrous the way he treated her, though perhaps he thought he was completing her education.

She ran straight into his arms with wide, shining eyes, astonished that he had somehow got there before her. She was beaten. His arm went around her, crushing her to him, his hand came out to brush her hair away from her face.

'Don't you dare! ' she said, still angry, but his caressing hand round her throat almost stopped her. 'Please, Nick. ' An upsurge of excitement made her voice shaky.

'Surely I won? ' His hand clasped her nape, shaping it, her hair curling over the cuff of his jacket. 'Anyway, I enjoyed it. '

'This is unfair—unfair advantage. '

'Hmm, but it's irresistible. '

It was impossible to twist away from him, so she gave up the fight, her body of its own accord searching for comfort. She loved him desperately, and unconsciously her whole being was projecting her desires. It was too much for him. He claimed her mouth with such urgency that it had a kind of desperation about it as if he intended never to kiss her again. She locked her arms tightly around his neck, neither of them gentle with the other. There was too much emotion to be compressed into this very short time. Her own response, she knew, was reckless and impassioned and without reservation. But what was the good of it? Surely he knew she loved him. In another minute she could deny him nothing.

It was Nick who drew back, pulling her arms down though he must have known he was humiliating her. 'Don't say it! ' she put her fingers across his mouth. 'I know. Extreme provocation. It won't happen again. '

She was still trembling with excitement and the fear of giving away her most closely guarded secret. The physical communication between them was shattering, but she was correct in thinking a man didn't always marry the woman who filled that particular role. There were other more prosaic considerations. Vanessa was a different kind of woman again. She tried not to think about her, but she couldn't allow herself to dream on. Maggie, that strong personality, had come to her rescue offering a distraction, though it wasn't until after ten the next morning, waiting for Tony to arrive, when she saw Vanessa's Volvo sweep up the drive, that she finally decided to do something constructive about her future.

She would see the rest of the world. Valuable lessons were most often painful. She was young. She would survive—somehow. It had been Worth it at that. She had lost her head, but now it was all over. Probably Nick would breathe a sigh of relief. Their attraction, though mutual, was evidently unsuitable. A world trip was merciful. She had known from the very first moment that Nick was dangerous to her. Now she had to cultivate the great gift of forgetfulness. In time she might earn a measure of success, or was it her destiny to know terrible disappointments?

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