Stranded. Filthy Beast

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Stranded

When I came to, Khepri was bouncing across my face.

“Ra? ” He prodded at my cheek with his foreleg. “Ra, are you all right? ”

“How can I be all right? ” I moaned. “I’ve been replaced by another cat!

And I’ve been banished to this lousy, no-good excuse for a village—” “Shhh! ” Miu flicked her ears in warning.

I blinked and saw Sabu standing behind her. Judging from his offended glance, he’d heard every word.

I tried to claw my way back. “I mean, I’m sure it’s fine if you grew up here—”

“It’s way better than a flashy palace, ” Sabu growled. “Call yourself a cat! Real cats don’t sleep on gold-embroidered pillows. ”

I rolled to my feet. “Hey! I don’t sleep on gold-embroidered pillows.

Gold thread is much too prickly—”

“That’s enough. ” Miu put herself between us. “Both of you, behave. ”

“But I’ve just lost my home forever. ” I’d never make it through the desert to Thebes on my own, even if the Nile weren’t in the way. “And I’ve lost my necklace from Pharaoh. And my snacks. My scrumptious, one-of-akind, made-just-for-me snacks. ”

“Very sad, ” Miu said. “But you’ll live. And it won’t be forever, Ra. ”

“That’s right, ” Khepri chimed in. “Pharaoh won’t be fooled, Ra. He won’t accept a substitute cat. He’ll send the Vizier right back for you. ”

“You really think so? ” I said.

Sabu gave a cat-shrug, but Miu brushed against me in a comforting way. “Of course, Ra, ” she said. “The Vizier’s sure to come back. Maybe not right away. But soon. ”

Khepri settled himself against my ear. “After all, there’s no other cat like you, not in the whole of Egypt. ”

“True. ” I cheered up. “Pharaoh can’t do without me. Not for long, anyway. ” At least I hoped so.

“And really, when you think about it, we’re lucky to be stranded here, ”

Khepri went on. “Now we have a chance to crack the case. ” Lucky? I wouldn’t go that far. But he had a point.

“We’d better get down to business, then, ” I said. “The Vizier could be back at any moment, and when he comes, I’m out of here. So we need to solve this case. ”

“What case? ” Sabu asked. “What are you talking about? ” “It’s a secret, ” I told him.

“No, it’s not, ” Miu said. Ignoring my protests, she laid out everything we’d discovered. “So it’s someone in this village, ” she finished. “We just don’t know who. We could use your help. ”

Sabu tilted his head curiously. “You mean, you’re trying to solve this case? Why not leave it to the humans? ”

“We can’t, ” Miu said. “They haven’t noticed any of the clues. ”

“But we’re Great Detectives, ” Khepri piped up with pride. “We notice everything. ”

“Great Detective? ” Sabu swished his tail, a sign of interest. “That sounds like a job that would suit me. ”

“We have enough detectives already, ” I said. When Miu glared at me, I added reluctantly, “But if you really want to help, I guess you could be our sidekick. ”

Sabu looked like he couldn’t believe what he’d just heard. “I’m not anybody’s sidekick, Fancypaws. I’m a leader. Go find some other cat to help you. ”

Head held high, he stalked off.

Fancypaws again! The nerve. But when I turned to Miu to complain, she said, “Ra, stop making trouble. We need him on our side. He’s the leader here. I bet there’s not a cat in Set Ma’at who will talk to us without his sayso. ”

Hmmm…I hadn’t thought of that.

Miu was still watching Sabu’s angry tail. “We’d better go after him before he disappears completely. But this time, Ra, let me do the talking. ” “Good idea, ” Khepri agreed.

By the time we caught up with Sabu, Bek was hand-feeding him snacks again. Honestly, the way that cat could eat! And did he offer to share? No.

As we came into view, he turned his face away and butted his head against Bek’s knee.

“The Scribe says nobody’s allowed in the Valley of the Kings until the Vizier returns, ” Bek was saying to Sabu. “So we can’t work on Pharaoh’s tomb today. But that means I get to see more of you—”

“Bek. ” A stocky man hustled up to the sculptor. “We need to talk. ”

It was Neferhotep the goldsmith, the man who had given my necklace away. Oh, little beads that go clink! I put my claws out.

“That sculpture you were going to make for my tomb? I want it bigger. ” Neferhotep stretched his restless hands apart, showing the size he wanted. His rings sparkled in the sharp sunlight. “Twice as big, in fact. ”

Bek gave Sabu one last stroke, then straightened to his full height. “Are you sure, Neferhotep? It will take longer, and it will cost three times as much. ”

“Don’t be ridiculous. ” Neferhotep jabbed a ringed finger at Bek’s chest. “Twice as much, that’s all I’m paying you. ”

“That wouldn’t cover the costs, ” Bek explained patiently. “A bigger stone is much more expensive—and that’s before I even start carving it. But maybe there’s some other compromise we can come to. Come to my place, and we’ll discuss it. ”

As he and Neferhotep walked away, I saw the boy Kenamon slip out of an alley and follow them. I pointed him out to Khepri.

“Maybe he’s going home, ” Khepri offered.

“Or maybe he’s trying to get a closer look at those rings on Neferhotep’s fingers, ” I countered. “I swear he has more now than he did when we got here. Maybe one of them comes from Setnakht’s tomb. ”

“If it does, he’d be pretty silly to wear it where everyone can see it, ” Khepri said. “You’re getting carried away, Ra. Yes, Neferhotep gave your necklace to another cat. But that doesn’t mean he’s a criminal. ”

“Sure it does, ” I grumbled. “He stole my necklace, for starters. ”

I sat down in the shade, and Khepri slid between my paws. Behind us, Miu trotted up to Sabu.

“Cousin, I’m so sorry! ” She spoke in her sweetest purr. “Ra was just teasing. He knows you’re a born leader. We all do. How could anyone doubt it? You’re clearly in charge here in Set Ma’at, and we need your help. ” She bowed her head to him. “Please, cousin, will you be our partner? ”

Sabu looked torn. Cousinship is a strong tie among us cats. Even seventh cousinship, twice removed.

“Look, ” he said to Miu. “I want to help you. But I won’t take orders from that high-hat palace cat, and that’s final. ”

Well, he wouldn’t be working for us, then.

But Miu continued in that sweet purr, “You don’t have to take orders from him, cousin. You and I can work together. I could help you organize the village cats into a detective force. You’d be so good at that! ”

Sabu lapped up her praise. “You’re right. I’d be great. ” His gaze flickered back to me. “Maybe I could give him orders. ”

“All right. That’s enough. ” I hauled myself to my feet. “Nobody gives orders to Pharaoh’s Cat. Khepri and I will pursue our own investigations, thank you very much. ”

“We will? ” Khepri said.

I gave him a look. “Yes, we will. ”

“We can meet up and compare notes later, ” Miu said, trying to keep the peace.

“Yes. ” There was laughter in Sabu’s green eyes. “Then we’ll discover who’s the real Great Detective. ”

Filthy Beast

It was all I could do to get out of there without starting a cat fight. But Pharaoh’s Cat knows how to behave with dignity. With Khepri perched on my head, I padded my way down the narrow main street of Set Ma’at.

When I was sure we were out of Sabu’s sight, I came to a halt.

“Did you hear that? ” I fumed to Khepri. “Sabu’s turned this into a contest. He thinks he’s a better detective than I am. ”

“That’s not necessarily a bad thing, ” Khepri said, “if it means he works hard. ”

“Great Detective, my paw! Why, he couldn’t handle being a sidekick. ” I was still fuming. “I’ll show him. I’ll crack this case before the Vizier comes back for me—with time to spare. ”

“We’ll crack it together, ” Khepri said. “Where do we start? With Neferhotep? ”

“No. ” I didn’t even have to think twice. “We’ll get to him later. But we’ll start at the top. ” What better place could there be for Pharaoh’s Cat? “We’re going to interview the highest-ranking animal in Set Ma’at. ” “You mean Sabu? ” Khepri said doubtfully.

“Of course not. ” I scowled. “Sabu can brag all he wants to, but we know who the real top animal is. ”

“Who? ”

Wasn’t it obvious? “Well, it’s the Scribe who’s head of the village. So the top animal is his favorite pet. He had the boy Kenamon paint her portrait.

Remember? What’s-her-name. ” “Menwi? ” Khepri said.

“Yes, that’s the one. ”

“What sort of animal do you think she is? ” Khepri wondered.

“Something classy, no doubt, with a name like that. ” The original Menwi had been a great lady in the royal court. “I’m guessing she’s a cat of fine lineage. Or perhaps a monkey or a falcon. ”

Khepri looked down the street of tightly packed houses. “And where do you think she lives? ”

“Oh, that’s easy. We’ll look for the biggest place in the village. Only the best will do for the Scribe. ”

Khepri thought this over. “So he’ll have the best snacks, too? ”

Khepri is quite clever sometimes. “Another reason to always start at the top, my friend. ”

In the end, we identified the Scribe’s front door by smell alone. As the village boss, he had the fanciest midday meal.

“This is it, Khepri. ” The aroma of cumin and duck made my head swim. It wouldn’t count as anything special at the palace, but I was too hungry to care.

I bounded toward the steps just as the Scribe himself came along, accompanied by Huya, the strapping young carpenter. They appeared to be in deep discussion, keeping their voices low, but when the Scribe saw me, he broke off. “Shoo! ”

“I’m Pharaoh’s Cat, ” I meowed indignantly. Not that it did any good.

“Go on, shoo! ” The Scribe brandished his inky staff at me, narrowly missing my tail. I yowled.

“My lord, stop! That’s Pharaoh’s Cat. ” Kenamon rushed up to my side.

Relieved to have a defender, I turned back to the Scribe. So there!

“Don’t be ridiculous, boy, ” the Scribe sneered. “Pharaoh’s Cat went back with the Vizier. ”

“But this is the one I was drawing, my lord. I’m sure of it. He’s even got a beetle on his head—”

“And probably bugs all over the rest of him, too, ” the Scribe interrupted.

“He’s a stray, boy. Look at him. ”

“But—”

“Don’t waste my time, Kenamon. I’ve had enough trouble from you and your family today. Can’t you see Huya and I have important matters to attend to? ” The Scribe turned to his brawny companion. “Huya, wait out here, and I’ll bring you, er…” He flashed a glance at Kenamon and lowered his voice. “Well, just wait here, ” he went on to Huya. “And don’t let that filthy beast in. I don’t want him mucking up the place and bothering Menwi. ”

“Yes, my lord Scribe. ” Huya elbowed Kenamon out of the way and planted himself in front of me.

“Who does the Scribe think he is, calling me filthy? ” I protested to

Khepri. “He’s the one with the inky fingers. ”

“Yes, ” Khepri said uncertainly. “But…”

“But what? ”

“Well, the trip out to the tomb didn’t do you any favors, Ra. I hate to say it, but you’re not quite the same cat. ”

For the first time since we’d gotten back, I took a close look at myself. My hind end was covered with dust. My tail was matted. My paws were mottled with clay. And those were just the bits I could see.

“This isn’t good. ” A chill went through me. “Even if the Vizier does come back, he’ll never recognize me. ”

“Of course he will, ” Khepri said, a shade too heartily. “We need to clean you up, that’s all. ”

As the Scribe vanished into his house, Huya aimed a kick right at my hindquarters. “Scoot, you dirty stray! ” I scooted before I was booted.

Kenamon followed after me, and when we reached a safe place, he bent down and held a hand out. He didn’t seem to mind how dirty I was. “Sorry, Pharaoh’s Cat. The Scribe shouldn’t have done that to you, and neither should Huya. But they’re awful to almost everybody. In fact, I think they might be up to—”

“Kenamon, who are you talking to? ” Pentu the painter rounded the corner. His hands had flecks of rusty paint on them, and his gaunt face was winched tight with worry. “Oh, it’s just a cat. ”

Kenamon stood, his feet arranged as if to guard me. “It’s Pharaoh’s Cat, Father. ”

“Pharaoh’s Cat? ” Pentu didn’t look past my dusty fur. “You have quite an imagination, Kenamon. ”

“He got left behind somehow, ” Kenamon insisted. “He needs water and food. ”

“Kenamon, you know we can’t afford to feed a cat. Not even Pharaoh’s

Cat. Which I doubt this is. ”

“But I thought you said that things were going to change—”

Pentu looked alarmed again. “Hush. ”

Some cat wisdom: when people say “hush, ” it’s time to listen up. I swiveled my ears, determined to catch every word of what came next.

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