Chapter 20

Chapter 20

“I’LL GO,” AHSOKA SAID, getting to her feet once the room was clear. “It won’t take me long to gather my things.”

“Ashla,” Fardi said. “I’m sorry we’ve put you in the cross fire here. We didn’t mean for the Empire to pin our activities on you.”

That brought her up short.

“Your activities?” she said. “But I’ve been—”

She and Fardi looked at each other in stunned silence for a moment, and then, of all things, Fardi began to laugh.

“You used our ships to run mercy missions of your own,” he said, and Ahsoka realized he hadn’t known for sure until just then. “You thought the Imperials were here for you.”

“Um, yes,” Ahsoka said. “They weren’t?”

“Well, they might have been here for all of us, as it turns out,” Fardi said. “I don’t know what you’ve been up to, but we have taken contracts and moved merchandise counter to Imperial regulations. You did some of the runs for us. My wife was furious that I was putting you in danger, but apparently you could handle it.”

“I thought it was ordinary smuggling,” Ahsoka admitted. “And it bothered me a bit at first, but then I saw how needed your supplies were throughout the sector. Every time I dropped something off, it felt like I was making a difference—but it wasn’t enough. The first time I heard a distress call, I knew that I could do more.”

“I did wonder why you were deviating from your schedule so randomly,” Fardi said. “Perhaps if we had talked about this, organized it for real, we could have had a longer run at it. As it is, I think you’ll have to leave, and we’ll have to go straight for a while to get our reputation back.”

“I’m in your debt again,” Ahsoka said. “This is the second time you’ve taken me in when I had nowhere else to go and the second time you’ve turned me loose instead of turning me in.”

“You’re a good mechanic,” Fardi said with a grin. “There aren’t so many of those that I am willing to throw one away just because of a few Imperial entanglements.”

“Thanks,” Ahsoka said. She started to move toward the door and then stopped. It was a risk to say the words out loud, but she had to do all she could before she left. “Fardi, you need to be careful with Hedala.”

The change in the older man was instant. His brow furrowed, and there was a determined gleam in his eyes.

“What about her?” he asked.

“She’s…” Ahsoka trailed off. She wasn’t sure how to say it without giving too much away. “She’s special. It’s important that no one realizes how special she is.”

Fardi blinked, putting the pieces together. Ahsoka wondered what he’d seen the little girl do, if he’d ever found her behavior odd and then dismissed it because he was busy. If he had, he was remembering it now.

“Do you think she’ll grow up to be a mechanic?” he said, and Ahsoka knew he’d understood everything she hadn’t said.

“There isn’t anyone to teach her,” Ahsoka said, choosing her words carefully. It was more than she wanted to reveal about herself, but so far the Fardis had given her every reason to trust them. “She won’t exactly grow out of it, but eventually she’ll grow into other things.”

“I’ll keep an eye on her,” Fardi said. “I promise.”

“Thank you,” said Ahsoka. “I’m sorry I can’t do more.”

“I am very much aware of what you have done, Ashla,” Fardi said. “And now that I know why you came back, I think we are even.”

Fardi held out his hand, and Ahsoka shook it. Then she picked up the package of tech pieces and went back to her room. She stood in the center of it, looking at her bed and the little shelf where she kept her few belongings. Then she knelt and spilled the contents of the bag onto the mattress to examine them again.

The bag was starting to fray, which wasn’t really a surprise considering all the oddly shaped pieces it contained. She spread them out, finding the pairs and the few pieces that had no match. She liked the colors of the metal and the weight of the pieces in her hands.

What she really wanted to do was close her eyes, reach out with the Force, and see if all the pieces somehow fit together. The door was open behind her, though, and she could hear the noises of the house. She trusted Fardi and his family, but there was a difference between suspecting something and knowing it, and that difference was dangerous. There was no reason for Ahsoka to put any member of the family at more risk than she already had. She’d be alone again soon enough. She’d be able to test her theory then.

Carefully, she slid the pieces back into the bag and retied the fraying ends. Then she put it into the carrying pack Neera had given her on Raada and added the other knickknacks she’d picked up, mostly from the children, who apparently thought she needed more shiny things to look at.

Ahsoka hoisted the bag onto her back, adjusted it around her lekku, and turned around. Hedala was standing in the doorway, looking at her with a serious expression.

“I don’t want you to go,” the little girl said.

“I have to, little one,” Ahsoka said. “It’s dangerous for everyone if I stay.”

“The shadow isn’t back,” Hedala said. “But I guess there are other shadows.”

Ahsoka wasn’t too surprised that Hedala could sense something she could not. It happened frequently with younglings. They’d be good at one aspect of the Force and not at others until they were trained. Obi-Wan told her that Anakin had been found by Obi-Wan’s master, Qui-Gon, because of his quick reflexes. It was her ability to sense people’s feelings and intentions that had marked her. Hedala was apparently good at sensing danger from a distance. Not a bad skill to have, untrained, at a time when having any skill at all was enough to make her an automatic target.

“I can handle it, thanks to your warning,” Ahsoka said. She was almost positive that she was telling the truth. “Your job is to avoid the shadows altogether, do you understand?”

Hedala nodded and then threw her arms around Ahsoka’s waist, as high as she could reach. Surprised, Ahsoka rested her arms on the little girl’s shoulders for a moment, and then Hedala drew away.

“Good-bye, Ashla,” Hedala said. “I’ll miss you.”

“I’ll miss you, too,” Ahsoka replied.

Hedala held her hand until they reached the front door and then waved until Ahsoka disappeared around the corner. Ahsoka didn’t like that she was leaving the little girl behind again, but there wasn’t anything she could do about it. Her position was too tenuous to include child minding. It was better for Hedala to stay with her family. At least Fardi knew to keep an eye out now, and he would tell the family what they needed to know.

What gnawed at her even more was that she knew Hedala couldn’t be the only Force-sensitive child in the galaxy. There had been thousands of Jedi because there had been thousands of kids like Hedala, and there still were, even though they had nowhere to go for training. And the Empire was hunting them down. It was another entry on the list of things Ahsoka could do nothing about. She was starting to really dislike that list. It was heavy, and she had no choice but to carry it.

She walked up the ramp onto her ship, both the hull and the navicomputer scrubbed clean since her last mission, and stowed her bag. When she sat in the pilot’s seat, her view was clearer. This, at least, was something she could do. She ran the preflight checks quickly, even though she wasn’t in any particular hurry, and took off when she had clearance. With no real destination in mind, she set a course at sublight speed and headed for one of the neighboring planets in the system. It was sparsely populated and covered with mountains. She couldn’t stay in isolation for very long, but taking a couple of days to clear her head and formulate a new plan was probably a good idea. There was no need to rush off half-cocked.

While the ship cruised along, she ran a scan of the hull and computer system, searching for any kind of tracking device. The sudden appearance of Imperials at the Fardi house was too alarming to overlook entirely. She hadn’t been away from her ship for very long, but it was more than enough time for someone to install a device. She found nothing, but she couldn’t shake the feeling of unease that Hedala’s warning about the new shadows had stirred in her. At least her stolen Imperial blaster was on board, so she’d have something to fight back with, if it came to that. She got it out of its hiding place so she would have it handy.

Her ship slid into the planetary atmosphere with only a small tremor, and she began scanning for a good place to set down and stay for a few days. Eventually, she found a spot with a wide enough platform to hold the ship. It was quite high up, so the air was crisp. The planet was smaller than the one where the Fardis lived but larger than Raada, so she was accustomed to the gravity. All told, it was not a bad spot to set up shop for a while and check the ship. It seemed to be running just fine, but since she had some time, she could give it a thorough onceover.

She was fine-tuning the plasma manifold when she heard it: the unmistakable hum of approaching engines. The blaster was still next to the pilot’s chair, so she had to run up the ramp and back into the ship to fetch it. She clipped the blaster to her side and cautiously walked back down the ramp.

Ahsoka could see the approaching ship now. It was flying low, skimming the tops of the mountains and weaving to avoid the highest peaks. It was definitely following her. If it were randomly scanning, it would have been higher up. She wondered how it had found her, and then she realized that since she hadn’t gone into hyperspace, whoever was flying that thing could have just tracked her visually.

The ship was not new, but it was well maintained. Even from a distance, Ahsoka could tell that much. It didn’t have space for cargo. Single pilot, she suspected. Maybe one or two crew. It began to descend toward her, which was interesting. At least whoever was flying in wasn’t going to blast first and ask questions later.

Ahsoka waited, calm and collected, until the ship landed. The other vessel’s ramp descended, and then a single figure emerged. Ahsoka couldn’t begin to guess if the being was male, female, or otherwise. Their armor was dark, and covered them from head to toe. They carried at least two blasters that Ahsoka could see immediately.

“Pilot Ashla.” The voice was heavily modulated. “Congratulations. You have come to the attention of Black Sun.”

OBI-WAN REACHED and found nothing.

It took him a while to get to this level of deep trance, and now that he was here, he was reluctant to pull up, even though he had failed once again. There must be other things he could see, other Jedi he could find and possibly aid.

Images flickered across his eyes. Padmé, dying, with the babies beside her. Yoda, exacting a promise and giving him a new goal. Anakin, burning on the volcanic slopes of Mustafar, blaming him for everything that had gone wrong.

And it had all gone so wrong.

Now he was back in the place where his carefully ordered life had begun to unspool. Not the exact location, of course. The Lars family lived in the middle of nowhere, and it was a part of Tatooine where Obi-Wan had never gone until he had brought Luke to them. But it was the planet where his whole existence had been forever altered.

He’d gone to Shmi Skywalker’s grave to apologize for losing her son. He had never met her, knew her only from Anakin’s stories, but Qui-Gon had made her a promise and Obi-Wan hadn’t been able to keep it. As he stood there, looking at the stone, he felt an even deeper shame. Qui-Gon had left her there a slave, and Obi-Wan had done everything in his power to prevent Anakin’s return. It was only the love of a good man, here on Tatooine, that had saved her—the kind of love the Jedi were supposed to eschew. Yet it had done something the Jedi could not.

But that was the past. What he did now, he did for an uncertain future and for hope. He had trusted in the light side of the Force for his entire life. There was no call for him to stop now. He found the center of his meditation, the quiet place where there was no emotion, no resistance, no worldly bonds. He rooted his feet in that place and reached again.

Still nothing.

Obi-Wan shook himself out of the trance, more annoyed with his failure than disappointed, and found he was still sitting on the floor of Ben Kenobi’s house. It was sparsely appointed, only the basic necessities. He hadn’t been there long, but he got the feeling that even if he stayed until Luke Skywalker had a long gray beard, he still wouldn’t accumulate many possessions. Tatooine wasn’t that sort of place.

He stood up, his knees creaking in a rather alarming fashion. Surely he wasn’t that old yet. It must be the desert climate that affected him strangely. He got a small cup, filled it with water, and then returned to his seat on the floor. Something caught his attention, one of the few pieces of his old life that he’d taken with him to his desert solitude.

Anakin Skywalker’s lightsaber.

It was all that was left of the man who had been, often simultaneously, Obi-Wan’s greatest annoyance, his brother, and his closest friend. If any other part of Anakin had survived, it was lost to evil and darkness. Obi-Wan couldn’t save him any more than he could save any Jedi who was still at large in the galaxy, trying to find footing in the new order. All Obi-Wan could do was make sure the child Luke survived to adulthood, and train him if he exhibited his father’s talents.

He wondered briefly how the daughter was faring under Bail Organa’s tutelage.

Then he closed his eyes and took a deep breath.

Down he plunged, through memory and dream. There was Commander Cody, handing him back his lightsaber only to blast him off the cavern wall moments later. There was Anakin, laughing as he made some improbably difficult landing, saving all their lives again. There was Ahsoka, her hands on her hips, her endless questions challenging him at every turn. There was Palpatine, as Chancellor, his disguise so complete that Obi-Wan couldn’t detect his villainy even when he knew where to look.

He made himself pass them all by. It was easier this time. It grew easier every time. That made his heart hurt, to think he was so fickle that he could turn his back on them to achieve his own ends. When he thought it, he heard Yoda, reminding him that his work was important, that he must focus on the future alone, obscuring the past and even ignoring the present if he must. He had to break through.

He reached the bottom again, the quiet place where his doubts, loves, and fears were gone. Then he realized it wasn’t the bottom, not quite. There was another level below.

Obi-Wan let go of Ben Kenobi’s house, the last place in the galaxy where a piece of Anakin Skywalker rested, and broke through the wall between life and death.

It was dark there if he wanted to take anything with him or leave anything behind, but he wished for neither of those things, so he stood in the light. His senses were sharp. He could hear every sound at once, and also none of them. It took him a moment to focus on the voice he wanted most to hear.

Alone and connected. Aloof and hopelessly entwined. Obi-Wan had only a moment before he was wrenched back into the physical world, but it was long enough to renew his hope.

“Obi-Wan,” said Qui-Gon Jinn. He was sure the voice was stronger this time. “Let go.”

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